Little bit long but could really do with some insights/advice. So...my 11 (nearly 12) year old ds is in primary school (not in UK so he will not be finishing primary until he is turning 13) and has been a bit upset lately - he says it is because nobody in school wants to play games any more at break-time, only stand around and chat, which he doesn't enjoy, he just wants to play football or playground games. So he has been spending his free time in school mainly on his own. I've encouraged him to join in the chat but he says he doesn't understand what they're talking about and then yesterday I think I figured it out. BTW he is currently being assessed for mild ASD, partly as he is not great at figuring out social situations.
There was an all-class party last week and he ended up playing with the 8 yo sibling of the birthday girl and their friends instead of his own class. Turns out that the girls and some boys from his class were chatting about who has a crush on who, and that the girls were chasing the boys they fancied and sort of trapping them for kisses. My ds's best friend was one of those trapped and was really upset about it, and reportedly a few of them have a crush on my ds but he just walked away when they told him.. I think my ds is just shutting it out, hence playing with the younger kids and not wanting to join in. We'll talk to him about what has been going on in more detail. I should add my ds and his closest friends are 'young' for their age and don't seem to be ready for this kind of thing. I really feel like having a chat with one of the girls' mums and seeing if she might have a word about being respectful of boundaries and unwanted attention. Am I being unreasonable? And is there a better way of handling this?