To be irrationally upset with DH

[EmmaBridgewatermug]

For xmas DH bought tickets to see a band in London, also booked a one night hotel stay in a place we've stayed before so I know its nice. I was extremely happy and grateful and have been looking forward to it for ages.
Now, DH has a habit of being a bit incompetent with arranging things but he reckons I'm too controlling so Ive sat back and not even looked at the arrangements as I know the place he's booked is good.
So, I ask if hes printed out the hotel booking ready for our travel next weekend and he hasn't so I said send it to my phone so I can print it out in work.
I look at the booking and hes only gone and booked a bloody twin room!!! I'm fucking tamping!!
We've got two teens at home and paper thin bedroom walls so any privacy and sex is very infrequent as it is. (I must add we arent loud but always on pins as the kids are always wandering around on the landing at all hours and they never go anywhere either to give us time alone).
I was so looking forward to this trip, I also find out hes booked just room only so no nice breakfast to look forward to either.
Im in work and ive actually gone to the loo and cried in disappointment which seems ridiculous, ive text DH raging and he is sorry but I'm fucked off with his sheer incompetence to do anything properly.
Is this an overreaction as at the moment I feel like telling him not to bother to go at all.

The point is you have a room to yourselves and time to yourselves. We don't need to tell you all the places you could have sex without the need for a double bed. I think he's hot it right personally. Push the twins together and then you can both get a decent night sleep without being disturbed by the other tossing and turning (in projecting I know 😬)

But you can just phone and add breakfast to the room though if that's what you want? I don't understand the drama to be honest!

You just seem ready to see the negative of this.

Push the beds together, or shag in one and then have a decent night's sleep (in the dry bed!).

I've never heard of a hotel where if you haven't prebooked breakfast they won't accommodate you in the morning of your stay. You can have breakfast, it's not the end of the world.

I don't mean to be harsh OP, but I think there's more going on here. What he's done is not crying in the loo worthy, I'd suggest it's definitely a symptom of a load of other frustrations. How is he generally?

You're going to have to make yourself laugh at this otherwise it will spoil the whole thing and he'll never even attempt anything like that again.

Wish someone would take me to a hotel. I can only dreeeeeeeeam.

Seriously I know and understand why you're so upset. That comic about the "mental load" becomes so relevant YET AGAIN...! (Look it up if you haven't already seen it). Often we wonder why men who are perfectly competent at work try and do the tiniest task and fuck it up. But yeah. He knows you're disappointed. He should ask himself whether he would have made the same careless mistake had it been a project for work. But. Just try and make the best of it and say that next year round 2 is the chance to redeem himself

'Or you can do this, you can do that'. It's absolving the men of having to actually think things through that makes them brand us screaming harpies when for the umpteenth time they've forgotten the milk, or not re-made the bed after stripping it, or booked the most basic room for what's supposed to be a romantic night out.

Do it just half-arsed enough and she won't expect or even want me to do it again.

OP, yes your reaction was a bit OTT but as you say it's the final straw. If he gives even half of a shit he'll try and put it right and email you a new booking

I thought this was going to be much worse, like he'd booked the hotel on the wrong date or in the wrong city - but you can push the beds together or phone and ask for an upgrade and breakfast to be added on, can you not?

It's easily fixable as PP have said. Ask for double room or get creative then go out for breakfast. Breakfast out would probably be far nicer than in anyway .. whereabouts in London will you be? I can recommend some breakfast spots.

Why would you need to drive around with a hangover, looking for somewhere to eat breakfast?

You've got plenty of time to google where to eat.

Twin beds in hotels usually simply zip together. Get DH to phone the hotel today and ask if that can be done for you for your stay.

She already said everything is booked up because she gave him the benefit of the doubt and didn't run after him checking everything and now she's looked it's too late.

Must be so annoying when if you'd checked you would have been able to change but frankly if it's a treat for you you shouldn't have to be checking his work like his bloody mum.

And now it's too late she'll be accused of being "hysterical" and "overreacting" when all she wanted was him not to fuck up.

Sometimes you can't win. But you gotta draw a line under it, try not to explode too much as that will give him future ammo.

Yes driving round with a hangover? So you plan to be a real danger to other road users??
Far more important than this little princess rant.

In fact it's not really even about the "solutions" as such, it's just the simple expectation that things will be done properly instead of having to rectify things at the last minute. This was meant to be a "break" for her & now she has to think of things like "ring hotel ask for beds to be pushed together" "Google where to breakfast" - simple stuff but it's still work, it's still the "mental load" (seriously, look up the comic). You have my sympathy OP. Hope you have a lovely weekend away

You are right, it is the mental load effect. I see to everything that requires a bit of thought. Don't get me wrong, practically hes excellent, will wash, iron, cook, clean (a bit) but every bill, everything that requires correspondence, all holiday arrangements, the kids arrangements for school, clubs, car MOTS's, insurances, dog vaccinations, every damn thing that requires brain work falls to me. I've spent months organising a 21 night USA holiday with 5 different hotels, car, theme parks, routes etc for us all and he cant book one fecking nights hotel stay properly.

I have never been turned away for breakfast in a hotel even if by some miracle you are then how far out of London is that you can't walk to breakfast? Twin beds? wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

I feel sorry for your husband tbh.

Yabu can't you just do it in one of them,

yuk.

Are you expressing disgust at the thought of a married couple having sex in a hotel bed?

I understand.

Booking a twin room was a stupid mistake that indicates a certain lack of thought. When it's one of a series of stupid mistakes of course it's irritating.

(sighs) ignore the posters excusing your husband. We're conditioned to accommodate men & forgive every single fucking time. Imagine if you had made the same mistake on your US trip...! I'm sure your husband & kids in tow would have found it hilaaaarious.

I don't really have any advice. I'm sure you will have a lovely time. I just think all of these suggestions "chin up and shag in one bed, come on where's your sense of fun?!" are missing the point.

Get inventive OP surely you don't want to be confined to the bed missionary style when you have a whole room and bathroom to fuck in noisily.

I understand that you are disappointed by his lack of organisational skills but maybe you could focus on having a weekend away. I net they offer room service so maybe you could just have breakfast in bed.

Talk about sledgehammer to crack a walnut. I feel sorry for your DH.

You push the beds together & add breakfast onto your order. Where's the drama?

We stayed in a Travelodge recently. All disabled rooms are twin. The manager turned it into a double by hooking the two beds together (they're designed for this).

You do have the "crack of doom" threat, but given it was less than £50 in London ....

I get you're disappointed but crying? Really?!

Sex in his bed then after a cuddle-sleep in your lovely clean, unmussed bed!

Oh don't get me wrong, the twin bed thing would annoy me, actually, it all would....just because of the lack of thought, and the mental load, but the "now we'll have to drive around with a hangover" comment was just ridiculous!

I can understand why you are slightly dissapointed but i think you should just try and look on the bright side! It was a nice thing for him to try and do anyway and it will still be romantic. Most hotel double rooms just have twin beds pushed together anyway albiet with the bedding made up so they dont come apart, but its not really that different is it!! And you can get breakfast somewhere nice in the morning outside the hotel, london is great for going out for breakfast!

I honestly thought your post was gonna say hed accidently booked a hostel or a non en suite room or hed booked the hotel for the wrong date or something!!
What has happened is not actually that bad really.

Lots of hotel rooms now have 2 double beds in them - just ask the hotel. I do think you're over-reacting though.