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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I'm so angry at my neighbour.

93 replies

helbel34 · 15/06/2017 21:12

We have had neighbours for the last 2 years the dh works away and is only home every couple of weeks. My dh and myself have socialized with the wife. E.g. drinks in the garden, and I have invited her in when I have had friends over. Tbh I have not really clicked with her but I felt bad that she was on her own.

So the issue is a couple of weeks ago my dh was downstairs late at night I was on bed, my neighbour knocked on our back window to ask if she could borrow a cigarette and proceeded to stay in my house for two hours what do you think.

OP posts:
LagunaBubbles · 15/06/2017 21:27

I presume your DH has a mind of his own and could have asked her to leave....if he wanted to.

Scholes34 · 15/06/2017 21:27

Good time to give up smoking.

Original poster
helbel34 · 15/06/2017 21:29

Yes we are married and I was in bed. My dh feels that she is a friend of us both and nothing wrong with neighbour coming in a 1.30am. I feel that I don't want to ask her in again.

OP posts:
HildaOg · 15/06/2017 21:29

Be pissed off with your husband and don't let her into your marriage, way too close for comfort.

Justmuddlingalong · 15/06/2017 21:31

You don't have to ask her again. But you don't choose your DH's friends, or do you?

LIZS · 15/06/2017 21:31

Surely your frustration should be directed at your dh. He allowed her in and to stop.

Sunnymorningwithbacon · 15/06/2017 21:32

What was she going to do? Smoke it and give you back the butt and ash?

cushioncovers · 15/06/2017 21:32

I think I would speak to your dh and tell him how you feel. Why the heck would he want to sit up until the early hours with a woman he barely knows? Hmm

PenguinOfDoom · 15/06/2017 21:33

But why are you still angry enough to post about it after two whole weeks?

Waltermittythesequel · 15/06/2017 21:33

I don't know what your problem is.

TheoriginalLEM · 15/06/2017 21:37

Is her nsme sharron and was there a wasp involved? did she divorce her dh for t rexing in asda?

Funnyfarmer · 15/06/2017 21:38

Is it the time she came the problem?

AcrossthePond55 · 15/06/2017 21:40

Are you saying you think she and/or your DH have the hots for one another? Are you saying it's 'improper' for a married man to be alone with a married woman late at night? Otherwise, I don't see the problem. It didn't disrupt your sleep (I assume) and if your DH wanted to go to bed and was too chicken to tell her it was time to go, that's his problem. Otherwise, if he wasn't wanting to go to bed and was happy to sit up chatting, what's the problem? Would you be as upset if it had been her DH chatting with your DH at 1am?

Original poster
helbel34 · 15/06/2017 21:42

I don't think that I would go to anyone's house at 1.30am and I'm also angry with my dh more so the fact that he says that he finds no problem in this.

OP posts:
HildaOg · 15/06/2017 21:45

I think you're absolutely right op. Don't trust her or your husband. She's not your friend. Do you have kids?

Justmuddlingalong · 15/06/2017 21:45

What problem do you have with it?

Original poster
helbel34 · 15/06/2017 21:48

I was awoken by them talking and I had to be up early for work. Tbh if it was her dh talking with my dh I would have not been so annoyed.

OP posts:
Original poster
helbel34 · 15/06/2017 21:49

Yes I have 3 kids neighbour has 2.

OP posts:
rolopolovolo · 15/06/2017 21:51

draw some boundaries NOW or you'll regret it later.

rolopolovolo · 15/06/2017 21:52

stop inviting her round for a start.

HildaOg · 15/06/2017 21:52

I would have gone down and ordered her out. Tell him he has a choice. The neighbour or your marriage. Don't let her in.

ShinyGirl · 15/06/2017 21:52

Why have you posted this again, didn't you like the other answers?

harderandharder2breathe · 15/06/2017 21:54

I don't get it

Someone who you and DH socialise with came and he let her in and they socialised for a couple of hours? That's just not a big deal. If DH had a problem with it he shouldve asked her to go so he could go to bed too. He didn't so presumably he was fine with it.

If the whole story is your OP then you sound paranoid

Original poster
helbel34 · 15/06/2017 21:56

Ha ha this is my first post and I wanted it on aibu.

OP posts:
Starlight2345 · 15/06/2017 21:57

I am still not sure what the issue is as I can only assume you don't trust your DH?

I assume she saw light on ? I am wondering about her children for the 2 hours though?