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Original poster

To buy my DS a dress?

532 replies

Isthereanyusernamesleft · 10/06/2017 21:26

I've one DS, he is my first & last (traumatic birth).

He's only 10 weeks so is still quite neutral I.E you can't necessarily tell he's a boy yet!

I think dresses are lovely & as I don't follow this gender society crap of girls wear dresses & pink & boys wear blue & trousers.....I don't see the issue in putting my DS in a dress.

However, everyone else thinks it's wrong!

Is it??

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
GinIsIn · 12/06/2017 16:12

FreeNiki I would far rather poppers than a poosplosion on my leg after a nappy explosion on my lap Hmm

NotYoda · 12/06/2017 16:20

Do POGs put little knickers over their nappies when they wear dresses? I have never noticed? When I was a child, they had these plastic pants for that job

FreeNiki · 12/06/2017 16:23

Who the hell says they have to be frilly? Confused

I posted some links to dresses thst were blue / yellow and were like a body suit with skirt attached. Not a frill in sight.

robinsongyal · 12/06/2017 16:23

No no no no! You are taking this decision waaaaay out of the boy's hands - he could grow up one day in resentment and embarrassment over the fact his mum would parade him around in dresses..stop trying to make a statement!

FreeNiki · 12/06/2017 16:38

And of course a tiny summer romper suit is going to prevent a poo explosion Confused

drspouse · 12/06/2017 16:41

For those saying:

It's unfair on the child, they have no say in the matter and
Think of how they will feel when they see the photos when they are older!

Do you feel the same about dressing a girl in dresses when she may not want to wear them when older?

Dressing a boy in baby football kit "because it's cute" when they may hate football when older?

Dressing a child in an outfit with a logo or picture such as a spider, dog, ballerina, high heeled shoes, truck, princess or superhero that he/she may hate or even be terrified of when older? Or dressing a boy in a pink polo shirt to match daddy or a girl in dinky blue jeggings to match mummy?
(I know several small children who are terrified of spiders and dogs to the point of not wanting to wear pictures of them - my own DD won't wear spider motifs aged 3. And there are vast numbers of boys who cringe at the thought of pink and not a few girls who won't wear girl because it's a boy's colour).

In all those cases the child has no say in what they are wearing as a baby. And they may be embarrassed or even horrified at seeing their own baby photos.

Yet most would say it's fine for the parent to do that.

BusterGonad · 12/06/2017 16:51

Oh come on drspouse is not really the same is it, of course the baby isn't going to give a damn at 10 weeks old, but my concern is will the mother carry on dressing the child as a Girl when the child is old enough to understand and then become confused themselves.

rightwhine · 12/06/2017 17:05

My retired dad still recalls that he was dressed in dresses as a kid. My gma used to tell him they all were in those days but it's definitely a "thing" for him. He doesn't like it.

drspouse · 12/06/2017 17:07

Buster what are they going to be confused about?

I thought the point was that the child wouldn't like it when they realised. Not that they'd think they were a girl.

When they are old enough to express an opinion one would hope the parents would listen to that opinion (if only to say, no I know you love it but you cannot wear your ridiculous padded superhero costume when it's 30C outside or just your fairy tutu when it's -10).

notomatoes · 12/06/2017 17:08

BusterGonad

I don't know how else to say this.. It makes no sense to me why people care so much about what someone chooses to dress their child in. Any more than why I would care what they choose to dress themselves in. But then, in school I was always more likely to be bullied for my clothes than to do the bullying.

MaisyPops · 12/06/2017 17:14

People wouldn't be massively bothered if they saw a child dressed in a unisex smock thing (even if I personally think they are awful).

What people are commenting on is the fact that the OP is clearly just wanting to dress their baby boy in highly typically feminine outfits just to make some kind of statement (though they say it's because it's cute).

I don't really care how people dress their child. But if they start dressing their kid up like a mini doll then they can't be defensive and aggressive when people say 'that's a bit weird'.
I think seeing babies on Toddlers and Tiaras is weird as hell. I think dressing a baby boy in a feminine dress because it proves how open minded you are is also weird as hell.

BusterGonad · 12/06/2017 20:05

notomatoes people care how parents dress their children because children deserve to be brought up correctly, not fulfill some fanciful whim of their parents, if I had a friend who dressed her new born boy up in pink frilly dresses and clothes obviously meant for a girl I'd have deep concerns. I don't give a shit how that makes me look, but to dress a boy up as a girl when that child has not made that decision themselves would send alarm bells ringing for me. If I turnt around a showed my son photos of him as a baby dressed as a girl he'd be very upset, why would you want that for your child? The reason I give damn about how people dress their children is because if everyone turnt the other cheek then children would go through hell due to the fact everyone had blinkers on, children are not toys to do with as you wish.

Morphene · 12/06/2017 21:06

buster so what you are saying is that everyone is responsible for maintaining the strict gender segregation and enforcement of gender stereotypes and hence anyone is justified in smacking parents into line about their DC's clothing?

Cool.

On the other hand, we could try and SOLVE the problems of gender stereotyping by encouraging people to break down the barriers. To help prevent boys doing badly at GCSE, and to help girls realise their potentials in maths and science.....

MaisyPops · 12/06/2017 21:12

Gcse performance and girls in stem subjects has sod all to do with dressing children in the highly gendered clothes of the opposite sex.

Total mixing of issues.

If the OP was actually interested in challenging gender stereotypes they'd just wear unisex clothing and get on with life promoting a range of interests as the child grows up.

But they didn't. Theyre writing self-congratulatory threads on dressing their 10 wrek old baby boy in a dress. They're making a point and a statement that makes people Hmm.

It's as concerned with challenging gender stereotypes as 90% of the people who think putting a 'pray for paris' frame on their Facebook profile picture actually care about global affairs.

In other words 'look at me'.

Morphene · 12/06/2017 21:15

I absolutely HATE seeing babies in dresses. I hate seeing them wearing frilly hairbands. I hate them wearing pink.

But I feel this way regardless of the gender of the child.

Why on earth parents want to label their child for the stereotyping purposes of the world I have NO idea.

IMO you should only dress your child as a girl if you want them to be discouraged from being ambitious, to be told they lack flair and talent, to be given lower ratings in maths and science than they deserve, and to be pigeon holed as successful only if they are pretty, caring, and have lots of friends.

I don't know why ANYONE would want that for their child.

My personal experience of this is of having a DD, who chose for herself a batman swimming costume, which entitled her to swim wear she liked in the pool (once she could swim). Once it wore out she chose for herself a pink flowery costume to replace it. Suddenly we couldn't move for life guards asking if she could swim well enough to go in the deep end. Endless queries, and some people forcing her back to the shallow end 'just in case'. I will leave you to imagine what this did to her confidence.

Seriously you need to hate your girls to let them wear pink....

So bear that in mind next time you let your child wear a dress to school.

BusterGonad · 13/06/2017 05:29

I'm not Morph so stop misinterpreting what I'm saying, You know full well I'm not saying that, what I am saying is how people treat their children is everyone's business, that is how child abuse is snuffed out, and before you jump on your high horse dressing a baby boy in a dress isn't child abuse but if the OP carries on the charade of dressing him as a girl for years then yes that is imo. I'm sorry I don't think it's cool to dress boys as girls, I really should be more with it but I don't think exposing your children to unnecessary bullying and teasing is really good parenting.

Wonders71 · 13/06/2017 06:31

morph you must hate your daughter to let her wear pink
Fuck off! My daughter can wear any colour she wants, play with any toys she wants and do whatever job she wants it's her choice!

Screwinthetuna · 13/06/2017 06:44

I haven't read all 17 pages but yes, putting your son in a dress is very odd behaviour!

Funnyfarmer · 13/06/2017 09:30

Bit ott @Morphene.
My dd wore pink as a child. Not exclusively.
She currently doing her GCSE's and is predicted to do very well. According to her teachers there's no reason why she couldn't go on to university. She's very happy, confident and independent.
Dd2 wore pink and dresses untill at about 3 years old, she decided she didn't want too.
She wore "boyish" clothes for a good few years. Now she likes dresses again now but only for dress up or going to party's.
She's only 6 but is doing exelent at school.

BestZebbie · 13/06/2017 09:45

I wondered about this as there are some gorgeous dresses around, but the conclusion I came to was that a dress or skirt is specifically a signal to other people saying "the person wearing this is female" in a way that a pink t-shirt isn't. So our son has had pink clothes, babygros/pajamas/tops/fancy dress onesies from the girl's ranges, fairy wings, girl's leggings, tights and even a nightie (as that is only seen by us), but no dresses/t-shirts saying "little princess etc" - the line for us is that he is a boy wearing a wide range of clothing, but we aren't trying to pass him off as a girl/don't want to appear as if we are.

VoteMe · 13/06/2017 09:54

-Morph

Seriously you need to hate your girls to let them wear pink

i think this is an extreme viewpoint. Does it apply to purple or sparkles? Or do you think it needs to be proper 'boys' clothing all the time? What about long hair? You DDs could be dressed in a Spider-Man outfit but it will be obvious they are a girl if they have 'girls' hair.

BusterGonad · 13/06/2017 10:01

My son had a girls onesie with a cat face in that had a pink heart as a nose, he's spent Christmas money in My Little Ponys, he had little baby girl dolls for Christmas last year. One of his favorite toys is a pink bunny. The BIG difference is he chose all of the above. When he was a baby he wore Winnie the Pooh baby grows, in lovely mint green, and ones with owls on in lemon yellow. I didn't dress him head to foot in blue or pink. If I wanted him to look cute I chose other things than frilly dresses.

BusterGonad · 13/06/2017 10:02

Sorry about the typos, in should usually be on! Confused

GhostPower · 13/06/2017 10:13

What's the point in posting, asking people's opinion on it and then discounting them when they do?

Maverick66 · 13/06/2017 10:24
Hmm
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