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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask people to move seats at the theatre

633 replies

Homemoans · 06/06/2017 15:48

My 6-year son really wants to see a play of one of David Walliams on Saturday, the only seats they have left are on the front row but they are 5 seats apart. WIBU to buy the two tickets and ask the 5 people sat in between us to either move up or move down?

To ask people to move seats at the theatre
OP posts:
LassWiTheDelicateAir · 07/06/2017 17:46

Livia is saying that people shouldn't book if they have to sit separately to the other person with them even if they don't mention anything to them about swapping seats

Livia said nothing of the sort. What on earth would be the issue of booking separate seats if you are happy with that?

The issue is booking separate seats in the expectation some one will move to accommodate you.

riceuten · 07/06/2017 17:52

What happens to singletons like me who want to see a play, pollymere?

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 07/06/2017 17:58

Of course you can book single seats. I regularly do.

malmi · 07/06/2017 18:06

A lot of people think you're being U for making the request.
I think that as long as you phrase it nicely and readily accept whatever answer you're given then it's fine to ask.
Some people would not like to be asked the question and having to turn you down but that's their problem not yours.
If the answer is no, you need to be prepared to either walk away or sit separately in good humour.

When it's an aeroplane everyone agrees that they should shuffle people around to ensure parents sit with children. I know this isn't the same but am surprised at how vehemently some are saying you would be U to book those seats.

Figamol · 07/06/2017 18:15

Yep it would make them massively uncomfortable for their whole evening if they're feeling under pressure to accept and dont want to. Its a lose lose, they probably chose those seats for a reason. And even if they did move they might not be happy about it.

However, I would be more sly and make it obvious on arrival that you're separated from each other and a decent human being might offer off their own back. It's exactly what I would offer anyway.

Jaxhog · 07/06/2017 18:18

Big risk.All things being equal I'd move but, as you see here, not everyone would.

BTW, I wouldn't necessarily move on an airplane. Not if it meant losing my precious window seat (I'm claustrophobic). Whenever I've been asked to move, it's nearly always to a rubbish seat.

Happysnaps · 07/06/2017 18:20

Definitely go for it - any problems, just pop them on your knee. I'd move.

QueenOfRubovia · 07/06/2017 18:24

It may be useful to ask the theatre attendant to help

They would tell you that you needed to sit in the seats you'd booked.
In fact, 'I'm sorry but I can't ask these people to move from their booked seats' is what they would most definitely tell you.
They might even ask to see your tickets and ask if you'd realised on booking that your seats weren't together. Because that's a weird thing to do.

Imagine the chaos if were to become commonplace to book on spec
and play musical chairs for 20 minutes before the performance.
Rules is rules for a reason.

To re-iterate. I would move if asked, but I'd think the person was a bit of a presumptuous knob to book seats that weren't together with the express intention of breezing in and asking others to move for them.

I would never have done that because I'm not a presumptuous knob.

SherbrookeFosterer · 07/06/2017 18:25

TimeIhadaNameChange is spot on, follow the given advice.

QueenOfRubovia · 07/06/2017 18:27

Some people would not like to be asked the question and having to turn you down but that's their problem not yours

It's a problem that you've foisted on them.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 07/06/2017 18:52

However, I would be more sly and make it obvious on arrival that you're separated from each other and a decent human being might offer off their own back. It's exactly what I would offer anyway.

Wow.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 07/06/2017 19:00

Oh and OP has had a chance of plan so it's all academic anyway

Helentad · 07/06/2017 19:03

Not theatre etiquette at all I'm afraid and I wouldn't be surprised if the patrons who had booked the seats early enough complained to and you were escorted out from the theatre. It's as bad as using your mobile or talking during the performance.

QueenOfRubovia · 07/06/2017 19:03

However, I would be more sly and make it obvious on arrival that you're separated from each other and a decent human being might offer off their own back. It's exactly what I would offer anyway

If the 5 people are in two separate groups, that would involve you negotiating with and disturbing the second group, who might not even have arrived yet. So you wouldn't be able to offer anything until the very last minute, if at all. And you might end up separated from your own group. See how complicated and bothersome it gets?

That's why it's not a good idea to book separated seats for you and your six year old with the self-centred attitude that you can guilt trip somebody into moving.

Not to mention. Wow.

VerbenaGirl · 07/06/2017 19:08

Yes, that is really not on. Could you not just sit a few seats apart?

StarHeartDiamond · 07/06/2017 19:12

Navy and white - "Knowing in advance you'll be asking those people to do you a favour by moving" - as I said and you quoted - how the heck have you interpreted that as having no intention of asking people to move??Confused

Hicks123 · 07/06/2017 19:15

You could buy both tickets and your 6 year old could sit on your lap. That way you've paid, and he gets to see the play. If anyone offers to move that's a bonus.

CremeBrulee · 07/06/2017 19:17

Yes it's unreasonable and entitled. If the seats you want aren't available to book, you can't have them.

user1487941567 · 07/06/2017 19:18

Why are people surprised that theatres allow single seats? I don't find this at all odd. I've booked many a single seat when it's been a play I really wanted to see, or if there is a group of us, we meet up to talk about the play after.

user1487941567 · 07/06/2017 19:31

From this thread I get the impression that some people think a trip to the theatre is rather like going to see a school play...

nina2b · 07/06/2017 19:33

Haha! Yes! Got it in one.

nina2b · 07/06/2017 19:36

Love the "However, I would be more sly..." touch. Astonishing and downright selfish.

Ugh

malmi · 07/06/2017 19:49

It's not that theatres don't allow single seat bookings, it's that they often disallow bookings which leave a single seat, with booked seats (or an aisle) on both sides of it. They want unbooked seats to be left in groups of 2 or more so they have a better chance of being filled up.

As the theatre fills up it becomes impossible to prevent single seats being left over without refusing the booking, so there are always a few single seats left.

southeastdweller · 07/06/2017 20:00

From this thread I get the impression that some people think a trip to the theatre is rather like going to see a school play...

Exactly, it's easy to see that many posters here aren't hugely familiar with theatre-going and etiquette.

Bigbiscuits · 07/06/2017 20:04

Eh?

I go the theatre a lot and on the scenario set out by the OP, I would have no problem moving at all.

It would be no skin off my nose and would make someone else happy - so it's a no brainer to me.

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