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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask what are the best things about having a little boy?

353 replies

KeplerYellow · 06/06/2017 14:51

I'm almost 30 weeks pregnant and really excited to be having a boy. I am however getting a bit scared about the whole giving birth part, so trying to focus on the bigger picture. I would love to hear how great it is to have a son to help me concentrate on the positives.

OP posts:
squoosh · 08/06/2017 19:27

Yeah hair bobbins make parenting a daughter a total nightmare!

AssassinatedBeauty · 08/06/2017 19:36

tomorrow there's every possibility that as you don't like those things then any daughter of yours may well not like them too? Liking Rainbow Magic is not inevitable or an innate preference of girls!

Tomorrowillbeachicken · 08/06/2017 19:37

tbf after eight years of trying I was just glad for a child, boy or girl. But I love my son and can't imagine any different.

Ginlinessisnexttogodliness · 08/06/2017 19:47

@bigbuttons well initially it in response to your withering remark after my "I am sad " one late last night.

Then - as I scrolled rough the thread and saw your attempt to make others feel asinine - on reflection it is actually in relation to those barbs too.

This was a thread started by someone who just wanted some frivolous, happy, celebratory observations: you and a few others warped it into a deconstruction of gender stereotyping and general contempt at times.

I'm sure she feels either a bit of a tit or just raging at how people have smashed up her little baby boy tea party.

Totally unnecessary and way more pathetic than the things you and others sought to scotch.

Ginlinessisnexttogodliness · 08/06/2017 19:48

Oh and nationality.

It's just ludicrously small minded and miserable. Have you really not got anything mor eimpkrts t to get so worked up about?

Ginlinessisnexttogodliness · 08/06/2017 19:48

More important not whatever that was......

paddypants13 · 08/06/2017 19:49

Squoosh my daughter sports a short bob (at her request) just so she doesn't have to have the whole hair palaver every day. I love that kid!

Coddiwomple · 08/06/2017 20:10

I think bigbuttons you are very narrow-minded and it's very amusing to see you deny people's personal experience on a light-hearted thread because you don't like their stories.

I feel sorry for your kids if you have any, if you are pushing your views so strongly on them instead of respecting their individuality. There's no shame on being a boy or a girl, and letting your kids go their own way instead of refusing them toys or activities which "reinforce stereotypes" and that sort of nonsense. Poor kids.

AssassinatedBeauty · 08/06/2017 20:16

No one is denying your personal experience. They're just pointing out, reasonably, that your personal experience isn't necessarily representative or accurate of people generally. Nor does it mean that the things you experience are innate to either sex.

"There's no shame on being a boy or a girl, and letting your kids go their own way" this is exactly the point. Boy or girl, it doesn't matter, every child should be free to pursue whatever their interests are. No one is suggesting that they should be refused toys or activities which "reinforce stereotypes", rather that there should be opportunities to experience all types of toys/activities free from opinions on whether it's suitable/appropriate/normal for their sex.

Primaryteach87 · 08/06/2017 20:18

My boys are utterly scrummy. Huge smiles, lots of cuddles and tell me they love me all the time. Just wonderful. You will be mightily loved.

ohgoshIdontknow · 08/06/2017 20:25

I didn't want a boy til I had mine (I have a girl as well) and now I'm a total convert. They love you with a fierce passion that takes your breath away, they tell you how pretty you look, and they are such, such good fun.

Congratulations!

Ginlinessisnexttogodliness · 08/06/2017 20:28

@AssassinatedBeauty don't patronise people on here with what we all know to be true.

People were just allowing this woman some light hearted heart warming individual anecdotes. Stop wrecking it.

If some of you are that peeves thens tart your own sodding discussion about how irritating / did people waxing lyrical about their babies can be and take it from there.

Ginlinessisnexttogodliness · 08/06/2017 20:29

Irritating / outmoded that should have read.
I need to learn to type.

Dandandandandandandan · 08/06/2017 20:32

I'm with you, Gin. It's not so much pissed on her chips as shat all over them by now! There's a time and a place for talking about very serious issues. Someone who is excited, nervous, hormonal, probably tired, scared about giving birth doesn't need them ramming down her throat and to be made to feel like shit for asking a simple and clearly light hearted question.

PunkrockerGirl · 08/06/2017 20:33

Mine are 25 and 21 now - still as loving and gorgeous as they were when they were babies/children.

EezerGoode · 08/06/2017 20:36

I've 1 girl.whos cost me over the years in clothes and makeup,the same as my 3 boys together...so yeah boys cost you less ....half joking😜

AssassinatedBeauty · 08/06/2017 20:43

I have two boys. I posted that it's great having two little individuals that develop their own personality and watching the process of that happening. I really don't care if people wax lyrical about how wonderful their boys are - I would about mine if I thought anyone was interested. I don't think that it's helpful whilst waxing lyrical to reinforce stereotypes as if they are inevitable and unavoidable. Plus the stuff mid thread about how awful girls are was pretty bad and surely not what the OP was asking for.

bigbuttons · 08/06/2017 20:43

Coddiwomple I have mentioned more than once how many children I have? Can't you be bothered to read? I thought you had read everything?

bigbuttons · 08/06/2017 20:47

Coddiwomple what views would I be pushing on my kids? That they are all individuals and not to be bound by narrow minded and ill- considered views of sexual sterotyping? That'll do me.

noeffingidea · 09/06/2017 06:47

people were just allowing this woman some light hearted heart warming anecedotes
By describing girls as one tenth as affectionate as boys, manipulative, full of drama, etc.
Yeah, that's really heart warming.
Other people don't lump babies in to 2 different categories and instead treat their children as individuals. Get over it.
I find it sad that this kind of stereotyping and expectations are even happening before the birth now. At least people used to wait until the baby was actually born.
I'm sure she feels a bit of a tit or just raging at how people have smashed up her little boy tea oarty
Well, yeah, I would feel a bit of a tit if I 'threw a little boy tea party' on Mumsnet AIBU.

I am sorry for any parent who was made to feel as if they should be disappointed for having a boy, as if boys are a consolation prize, etc. That wasn't a thing when my children were born, and nor should it be. All are indiduals, and of equal value. Is it so hard to look forward to the birth of a baby, who just so happens to be a boy, and take it from there?

myusernamewastaken · 09/06/2017 08:27

I have 2 boys aged almost 19 and 20 and they are both utterly gorgeous and its an absolute joy to see them growing into fine young men.....

Designerenvy · 09/06/2017 09:53

As I said before, I have 2 ds....love them to pieces. I also have a dd....love her to pieces too! I don't discriminate on their sex. I love them all for their individuality. .... nothing to do with gender.
The boys bring a cretain energy and my girl brings a different energy. All 3 are very loving and caring.
I do believe there are innate differences in boys and girls ( there's bound to be, it's biological!) But both can be equally endearing and equally frustrating, depending on the day !

Ginlinessisnexttogodliness · 09/06/2017 10:05

@noeffingidea it's you and other sour pusses that need to get over themselves.

Stop over analysing and dissecting. If you can't tell that most people who posted some thing nice about boys on here were just sharing their pride at their children - and not seriously stereotyping - then you need to start cuddling puppies and kittens and reading Pollyanna just to counter the bleakness.

I have a son and a daughter and another baby on the way. They are equally precious and wonderful but very different. Don't you dare tell me I'm stereotyping them or lumping them based on me commenting on my son being heartbreakingly sweet. Who do you think you are???

Stop being a know it all, when in this context you don't know anything.

notfromstepford · 09/06/2017 12:31

Hi OP
I have 2 boys age 1 and 5 and a DSD who is now 24, but have been in her life her since she was 3 and you couldn't get less of a "girly" girl.

They are all loud, funny, affectionate, laugh at farts, love getting filthy dirty in mud, playing rough and tumble, love cars and motorbikes and are an absolute delight to be around - wouldn't have it any other way.

Although, when they are all together it is absolute mayhem and you can't hear yourself think! However the crazy giggling and laughing and seeing them all happy is the best thing in the world.

Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy - you're going to adore having a son! Smile

noeffingidea · 09/06/2017 13:49

Ginlime no I don't need to get over anything.
This is AIBU, not everyone agrees with you , get over it. If that's the way you feel about your own children, that's absolutely fine. Other people feel differently about their own children.
My children are individuals, they are all different people, nothing to do with their sex. By the way theres a fair amount of research that has been done on this subject, indicating that male and female children are socialised differently from birth, leading to different patterns of behaviour.If the OP feels her 'chips have been pissed on' well that's tough really. It's AIBU. Netmums is thataway.
And nice bit of rudeness from you, referring to myself and other posters as 'sourpusses'. Do you always insult people who hold different opinions from you?