To be a bit annoyed about school awards?

[ThePlatypusAlwaysTriumphs]

Dd1 is in 2nd year, going into 3rd. She is an intelligent and very hard working girl. She is one of the few in her class who always completes her homework. She has come top of most of her classes in exams, getting 100% in 4 subjects and high 90s in all others. They have just had their awards announced, for which there will be a ceremony. Dd hasn't won a single award, even in the subjects she got 100% in. The awards are for "effort" and "endeavour" and have been given to children who didn't do as well as dd in the subject. She is embarrassed and upset, as all her friends have won awards.
What is going on? We realise and have explained to her that it seems to be important today to try to encourage children who haven't done as well, despite working hard. But for 13yo dd, it feels like she has worked hard and done well, and it's not something to celebrate. Why are the school so afraid to give reward to children who are very capable and achieve good results? I'm not outraged or anything, I realise that her effort and achievements will eventually be their own reward, but I'm mildly miffed that her diligence and ability are to be ignored by the school. What message is the school sending to more able pupils? You don't count?

Awards for effort and eendeavour are extremely important for all the children who bust a gut but will never be rewarded with coming top in any class or ever getting 100%. It's a way of recognising their worth.

YANBU
this was exactly the same when I was at school.

There were also special treats for the 'naughty' kids if they behaved for x amount of time. No thought given to the ones who were always well behaved.

Not sure what can be done about it though.

cauliflower what about recognising the 'behind the scenes' gut-busting that goes on from the 100% achievers? No one gets 100% by chance no matter how naturally gifted they are

At my ds school the 'awards' all seem to go to the kids who are generally bad behaved, naughty , quite horrible. I think they use it to try and bolster them. To hell with the ones that actually put in proper effort and do well though.

I couldn't get annoyed about this. Your child is always top of the class. She is a winner every day. You should try to let her feel happy for other kids tasting a moment of glory.

I do think they should be recognised. But it's never going to be totally fair.

I guess those who get their 100% every test have the reward of knowing that they will get on whatever A level course they want, any uni and job they want. A world of options. Also many want the 100% for their own personal satisfaction.

Those busting a gut who will only ever scrape Cs and Ds at best despite putting in all the effort and never getting good actual results are the ones who, in my opinion, need to feel additional success.

I can see your point, but I dislike these awards anyway as true motivation needs to come From within.
As she gets 100% already maybe her teachers don't think that is a huge effort for her and they'd like to see her stretching herself? Asking for extra work or extension stuff? Or maybe 💯 and top Marks is seen as a reward of sorts already and those who work equally hard but never get the grades need the recognition more as they don't have the "proof " so to speak.

Two points:

1. your DD's turn will come in the next half term. Everyone gets a turn once a year, with a few exceptions getting two turns.

2. as other posters have said the awards aren't really for recognising good behaviour, hard work or attainment. They are more for encouraging those who tend to perform less well, apply themselves less or misbehave more to improve so the teacher seizes on any positive occasion and declares an award for that. It is tough on those who are consistent though.

My children are now in secondary and yet they still mind that others are given awards for lower attainment than they achieve. They were complaining to each other only today along the lines of "What do we have to do to have our achievements recognised?". So, it doesn't get easier, I'm afraid, because schools are too busy to worry about the highest achieving.

Of course they deserve a award, just because some do not get good grades even if they are busting their guts saying they do not need it is wrong all people should be appreciated for their hard work.

Effort awards are always going to be dodgy.

Firstly, it's very hard for a teacher to tell 100% who's really putting in effort - okay, there are some obvious ones, but (and I know it's irritating to hark back to one's own schooldays) when I was at school and got effort grades on my report, they bore little to no relation to how much effort I actually put in. English, I got great marks without really trying, got a 1 for effort (the highest grade). PE, in which for the first couple of years I absolutely worked my arse off, I got 3s or 4s from one teacher, 1s or 2s from another. Once I stopped being taught by the teacher who recognised my effort, I eventually stopped trying because it was so demoralising to be told all the time that I was lazy and not trying hard enough. FGS I passed out at one point from trying to run the 800m with an asthma attack Similar things happened with other classes - German, got good grades without a lot of effort, got 1s. And so on.

Secondly (I might be being a but cynical here, but hey), it's a question of who the effort grades are for. Obviously a large part of it is for the student getting the award, to recognise all the effort they've put in. But additionally, they're for the other kids, and for that to be a good example to the others 😒 they have to be given to the obvious strivers. Giving an effort awards to the kids who stay quiet every lesson, get their heads down, work hard on their homework but don't super-obviously show it does nothing to show other students that effort is worthwhile (and I question rewarding effort anyway; effort should be something that is one's own decision to make, and teaching someone to make an effort in order to get a reward unrelated to doing better in the subject than you would otherwise have done is a bit weird).

When you said 2nd yr going into 3rd, I thought you meant a primary KS1 child going into KS2.

I could understand a child of that age being upset. Not so much a 13 yr old.

Why do you think schools might be encouraging those who need encouragement? What is is that they might be trying to achieve?

Does your child not get positive feedback? Does she not feel she's doing well? Were the teachers mean when you met them at parent interviews with her?

I really think that with a little bit of thought you can support her through this.

Whilst I do understand that it's irksome for parents (usually in primary school, btw) to see "naughty" children being given rewards and congratulations and treats, I think it's very short-sighted of those parents who are irked to not understand that if a child can be motivated to do better, it benefits ALL the class.

Or, the schools know information you don't. I was once told (when running an after school club) "we're being kind to xxx at the moment. It's not his fault, but his foster placement is breaking down". I didn't even know the kid was fostered. Was the school wrong to have cut him some slack? Were they wrong to keep this private from the rest of the parents and children?

I think you need to trust that schools look at the bigger picture.

Talk to the school yourself if you need to, but I wouldn't recommend allowing your child to fester about stuff like this. Be brisk and move on.

You could always reward your child yourself if you felt your child deserved it and the school was lacking?

I do appreciate that other children need to have their efforts awarded, but I feel sometimes the more able children are given the impression that they ability is almost an embarrassment. I was the same as dd at school and was made to feel like a bit of a freak. The one thing I could do was so we'll in tests/exams , but then that is now brushed under the carpet too. So now you're freakish to your classmates and unreleased by the teachers.
Don't get me wrong, dd is smart enough to see through it, but she has a real sense of justice/injustice and she is a bit upset that her efforts are not recognized. It's hard for a 13yo to think about the rewards she will garner in 5years time. It seems too far away for her.

And something else as well....

whilst it's fantastic to always get 100% (and congrats to those who do or who come near it)

Isn't it a greater achievement to be at (say) 20% level and work really hard and get 40% in the same academic year?

No disrespect to those at the top, and those kids might be improving at the same rate, but OFSTED look at the RESULTS without really caring about how ATTAINMENT improves. If you had a class of (say) year 3 children, all of whom were at year 1 levels, and by the end of year 4 were all at average levels for a year 4 child, wouldn't that be an amazing achievement? Wouldn't that say amazing things about the teachers? OFSTED would pan that class for only being at expected.

I think it's more about the learning journey for your child, and it's more about how schools bring on and improve the outcomes for each child, and whether they stretch them appropriately. But I know I'm in a minority about this.

Keepserving, she does get lots of positive feedback at parents nights etc, and obviously she knows we are proud of her. I'm just not so sure that the school giving out awards randomly is such a great thing for any of the pupils. When they move on from school into real life they will have to readjust to the fact that you need to achieve to get on. If you don't do what's asked Of you (e.g. Homework) you won't get rewarded! And yes, it does feel as though the awards are almost random, dd s friends are laughing at the awards they have win, as they are bemused at why they have been given them!

In my dcs school there was two awards for each class. Academic and effort. I think its good to have an academic award as often those dc dont win sports awards or make team captain but that is their moment of glory. They also had awards for best contribution to school..best represented school on all occasions..So overall there was a good chance of recognition on some occasion.

I honestly don't have as bad grammar and spelling as this! Blummin tablet keeps autocorrecting my posts!

Junebirthdaygirl, that's what I would expect - some recognition of academic achievement AND other awards for effort/contribution etc. But seems like academic achievement is a dirty word now.

I get what you mean, OP.
It is incredibly demoralising to be very good at something and get absolutely no recognition whatsoever. Especially when you see people who you know are not as good as you being praised to the rooftops and you are overlooked.
There's nothing like it for making you think "Oh what's the point in trying hard and doing well?" and to decide not to bother putting in the effort any more.

If you don't do what's asked Of you (e.g. Homework) you won't get rewarded!

No, and in a work situation, you'd get the sack. I assume your DD understands this basic life lesson without school having to enforce it? But the rest of the kids in her year are going to need to try and earn livings too, and the school is trying to support them in that (probably in a variety of ways? Assume they'll have detentions and other forms of consequence as well as rewards?) Should they not bother trying to install life-skills into kids who need them? Some children - literally - never know what it feels like to 'win'. Isn't school partly there to help them feel that feeling, that empowerment? So they can build on it.

Maybe your DDs school is rubbish, and these awards are as random as you think. Maybe some of the kids who've won things are young carers or who came with EAL or who have hidden disabilities or indeed anything that they've overcome. None of which you or your child would or should be aware of.
Perhaps rather than encouraging your child to feel hard-done-to, she should be celebrating the achievements of others whilst knowing she's going to be absolutely fine in anything she chooses to do, which puts her miles ahead of most children in the country

I read 6 / 7 years of age too. At 13, surely this isn't a shock any more?

But I get the disappointment. DS did extremely well last term in his best subject. It was an external exam that the school gave to their G&T kids and DS performed exceptionally well. Other schools put it in their newsletters and maybe present the certificates at an assembly. DS's teacher ( who is also head of dept), however, hasn't even bothered to hand over the certificate. YY it feels like the school wants to not see that he is exceptionally able. I don't think it's embarrassment though. More a dislike of the talent for some reason.

If the award recipients are anything like most teenagers, they were probably embarrassed to get an "effort" reward, to be honest.

I was shite at PE and would have died of mortification if I had been given a reward in recognition of my effort (*). I wonder if the schools have actually looked at how the kids getting the rewards actually think about them?

Small children are one thing, but most teenagers will probably find getting a pat on the back for "effort" deeply patronizing.

(*) not that there was any chance of that since I went out of my way to avoid moving on the sports field....

stuntcamel are you talking about school or the outside world as an adult?

OP, may not be relevant to your DC but research shows praising ability reduces achievement whilst praising effort increases it.
By rewarding ability, you are giving the wrong message to children.

It is widely regarded as being best practice for both parents and schools to reward and affirm effort rather than results. It may appear to your child's teachers that she started from a place of excellence and therefore has not had to work as hard for her 100% as another child. I think schools also assume that academically high-achieving students are intrinsically motivated rather than motivated by awards. Also, I assume they have chosen a sample of high achievers (using whatever metric they've chosen) rather than every child. If everyone gets a prize, it devalues the prize.

I would take the opportunity to affirm your own child's effort and work (her results are surely their own reward?). It is a child's belief about the event, rather than the event itself, that is most important. Tell her to keep it up and she might be chosen next time. She should also be aiming for attendance and sports and community awards, not just improving in the areas she finds easiest. Or tell her it doesn't matter because in time her academic success and work ethic will get her places and no employer will ask to see her second year Maths test results. What I wouldn't do is feed her incipient persecution complex by showing any anger about her not getting an award.

I said what Carol and Wardrobe said, but not so well and in a lot more words!

(do I get an award?)