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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be confused by other people's finances...

314 replies

Haudyerwheesht · 29/05/2017 18:19

I know it's none of my business obviously but still....I want to know!

For example how does my neighbour who only has one adult working in an averagely paid job afford to go to Florida and do Disney / universal etc twice in 6 months?

How does another person I know live in an enormous house and wear designer clothes and have lovely holidays etc when they're 24, with 3 kids and don't work (husband does). I kind of know the answer to this as they're both from wealthy families....but I want to know the ins and outs because I'm nosy!

Why does my friend rent for 1.2k a month and fritter money away when they could ft a mortgage much cheaper if they had a deposit?

How can my sister moan about money when she has no mortgage or housing costs, no council tax and her and her husband both work full time??

Obviously aibu to be so nosey but I'm not the only one am I?

OP posts:
Ohyesiam · 29/05/2017 19:11

westray I've done lots of going to the gym and walking in the woods, and it's never earned me a penny. What's your secret? Grin

ballerinabelle · 29/05/2017 19:12

My DH and I earn £31k and £30k respectively and live in a house where the mortgage is £275 per month....we bring in about £3900 per month and we're savvy with our bills. We could probably live in a much bigger house and go on much fancier holiday but we don't do debt.

Giddyaunt18 · 29/05/2017 19:12

Credit cards probably.

catsarenice · 29/05/2017 19:13

I've come to the realisation that a lot of it depends on when people bought their house and therefore how much their mortgage is. We earn a fair bit more than my sister and her dh but they bought a few years before us and their mortgage is about a third of ours for a very similar house. Same goes for friends etc. Can't wait to pay off the mortgage (15 years ) !

hellokittymania · 29/05/2017 19:14

I am quite frugal, I don't drink or smoke, most of my things come from Asda, Sainsbury charity shops etc. I do spend a large chunk of time outside of the UK, but mostly in developing countries and it's for work, so again, I'm not spending money on tors of things. I do have to eat at markets, Street stalls etc when I am in these places, but meals are usually one dollar each if you know where to buy them. Also, I don't know how I do it, but I somehow managed to get very cheap flights even though I book them sometimes 24 hours before I travel. Friends joke that I should be there travel agent! Grin

I do attend conferences and events, but some of them are free.

I also love the Londonist website, which also has a lot of free or cheap things to do. I found a Cinema club in London that has films for 5 pounds and you get popcorn and a drink.

U

mynotsoperfectlife · 29/05/2017 19:14

S'all Younique according to my mate. Hashtag BOSS LADY!

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 29/05/2017 19:14

It's one of those things that varies person to person.

Do people really concern themselves with the lives of others to this extent?

early30smum · 29/05/2017 19:15

Parental money, inherited money, credit cards and living beyond your means. DH and I often talk about the fact we think lots of our friends live well beyond their means, which is fine, but if something happens, everything would come tumbling down.

cardibach · 29/05/2017 19:16

Sofia I can cook. I also like to host friends at home. However, it is in no way cheaper to feed, say, 4 people than to pay for one meal out.

illneverknowwhereigo · 29/05/2017 19:17

We are the opposite.

Together DH and I bring home around 5k per month. Our mortgage is only £700.

We run out of money before the end of the month. But we never go on holidays, rarely eat out, don't have flash cars, no school fees, no childcare fees.

I think we are just utterly crap with money day to day.

whirlycurly · 29/05/2017 19:18

We were wandering past a pretty ordinary hotel yesterday and their menu was outside - mushroom tortellini for £17.. I thought at the time that one 2 course meal there for the 4 of us would probably equal my normal supermarket budget for the week - even in Waitrose. We could probably afford to eat out regularly but it often seems so extravagant and I'd rather have a coffee and cake and put the money towards really good holidays - a higher priority for me.

I think some people just live up to and beyond their means, even if they have lots coming in. I once worked with a girl who was on a £15k salary but had racked up nearly £40k credit card debt.

I try and save as much as possible into my mortgage, pensions and savings. I want to be able to be mortgage free and able to travel in retirement, not counting every penny.

Giddyaunt18 · 29/05/2017 19:19

However, it is in no way cheaper to feed, say, 4 people than to pay for one meal out.
I disagree, you can eat and drink very well at home for much less than the price of a meal and drinks out.

Blinkyblink · 29/05/2017 19:20

Those with very low mortgages, I'm guessing interest only in most cases.

That's not savvy. If you're saying a reason why you have significant disposable income is because you have a low mortgage and it is an interest only mortgage that you have nothing to crow about.

Noofly · 29/05/2017 19:20

gillybeanz bitcoins are a form of crypto currency. They used to be worth next to nothing but are currently around the £1500-£1900 mark. The price fluctuates by the minute. I want to but Ethereum now (another crypto currency) but coinbase, the only exchange I want to use has had problems accepting EU credit cards for the past week or so because so many people have been trying to buy bitcoins. It's all a bit nuts, but other than selling the odd one here and there I'm hanging on to them for the next 10 years.

(And this is in no means trying to advise people to buy them. I just happen to like super risky bets)

Blinkyblink · 29/05/2017 19:20

"Then you have nothing to crow about"

cardibach · 29/05/2017 19:21

Depends where you go, Giddyaunt. If you're after the £17 tortellini, you are right. It's easy to eat out far more cheaply than that though.

ILikeyourHairyHands · 29/05/2017 19:21

To the PP who asked about Bitcoins, they're a cryptocurrency, currently trading at about £1700, so the poster who bought them at a tenner has done very nicely there.

ILikeyourHairyHands · 29/05/2017 19:22

Noofly, have a look at Ripple.

Blinkyblink · 29/05/2017 19:22

Noofly, out of curiosity , what is the logic in holding on to then for ten years?

If they take off, then the value of what you have will be decimated.

If they don't take off, then no valje.

Surely something as bleeding edge as investing in bitcoins requires a less long term view and a more flexible, I'll potentially off load at any moment ie when I think value at peak, whether that's 2 weeks or 12 years down the line?

Giddyaunt18 · 29/05/2017 19:24

Went to a burger chain restaurant last week. 4 main courses only and 6 drinks came to £65. I could make a 3 course meal with wine for that and have change.

BarbaraofSeville · 29/05/2017 19:24

However, it is in no way cheaper to feed, say, 4 people than to pay for one meal out

Of course it is. Very average middle of the road restaurants charge £5 for a starter, £10 for a main, £5 for dessert, £10 for half a bottle of wine, that's £30 and it's easy to spend more than that especially if you have coffees, extra sides, bread, olives, water etc.

For a start for that £30 you could get 2 lots of the M&S Dine in for a tenner deal and feed 4 people and that still leaves a tenner for a starter.

Or you could get all manner of other sorts of supermarket food at least of equal quality, probably higher if you are a reasonably competent imaginative cook.

jarhead123 · 29/05/2017 19:24

I know what you mean!

We have friends who are on a very low income yet regularly go on cruises. I know for a fact they're up to their eyeballs in debt!

ILikeyourHairyHands · 29/05/2017 19:24

You need to look at high-volume margin trades with your cryptos.

AndNowItIsSeven · 29/05/2017 19:27

RainbowsAndUnicorn
" (tax credits with three chidren are very generous), " not really because you need to feed and clothes said three children.

LuxuryWoman2017 · 29/05/2017 19:27

Of course it is sometimes credit or inheritance, but on any road of identical houses one family could be paying £200 a month mortgage,, the next family £1500 depending on when they bought it.
Also, rarely mentioned is low interest rates, many, many people have seen their monthly payments slashed to almost nothing, so they have lots of spare cash or they've had the chance to pay down the mortgage at a rate of knots (mine went from £850 to £197)

Also, there are a lot of people who have had large PPI compensation payouts, thousands of pounds which would pay for a Florida holiday or nice car.

These are extra reasons on top of the ones usually mentioned like debt or parental handouts.

Everyone has different spending priorities, I have friends who like expensive clothes or go to the theatre a lot but take no interest in their homes, I spend my spare cash on my home as I like to entertain indoors.

So many reasons.

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