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AIBU?

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Original poster

To donate my cats money to a charity?

16 replies

mynotsoperfectlife · 27/05/2017 02:31

I am sure everyone will say I'm not being unreasonable but I need to hear it from a third party.

My lovely, lovely cat died this week. I love all cats but this guy had seen me through two close bereavements and various personal difficulties and he just made it better by being by my side purring.

Cremating him alone for £100 seems ridiculous but a group cremation seems somehow undignified for such a special cat and I've cried buckets over imagining all the dead pets.

DH has suggested we donate the £100 to the local cats protection league in his name. What do you think?

Don't flame me. I'm so upset.

OP posts:
Ollivander84 · 27/05/2017 02:39

I think it's entirely up to you and no flaming required ever. The donation is a lovely idea but so is individual cremation Flowers
What does your heart say?

fortheloveofcats · 27/05/2017 02:40

I think it's a wonderful idea. You're able to preserve his memory but also help other cats.

FelineEleganza · 27/05/2017 02:45

I'd rather have my beloved pet with me forever than spring for a charities advertising costs but whatever floats your boat I guess.

Ollivander84 · 27/05/2017 02:49

Also if you liked you can get ashes set into jewellery, or maybe get a little something that is a sort of memory? I have a double stacking ring, one has the birthstone of my pet and the other band says "it all started with a horse". Was about £40 from a lovely woman on etsy and I wear them every day

Wincarnis · 27/05/2017 04:37

Went through this last year when my dog died. Opted for individual cremation - couldn't bear the thought of my faithful companion of 17 years mixed in with whatever else they happened to have in that week.

Agree with Ollivander you can get nice memento jewellery & ornaments to keep the ashes in, then your special cat will still be with you.

look after yourself Flowers

RainbowsAndUnicorn · 27/05/2017 10:27

I had an individual cremation as wanted them back home with us where they belonged.

You could do that and then donate whatever you would have spent monthly in food/litter/treats etc to a local cat sanctuary.

Original poster
mynotsoperfectlife · 27/05/2017 10:28

Will definitely be rescuing another cat so won't be saving any money on that. Not to replace my boy but there are so many cats needing loving homes.

OP posts:
usershitloadofnumbers · 27/05/2017 10:31

I think you should do what makes you feel better. Nothing wrong with spending £100 when you are so upset. I might have a different view if it was £10,000 but there's nothing wrong in your plans. Your DH's suggestion wasn't a bad one, but do what you feel is best. The jewelry idea is a good one.

ColossalKalamari · 27/05/2017 10:35

I would have my beloved pet individually cremated and have its ashes back with me, without question

Yogagirl123 · 27/05/2017 10:47

Hand hold OP. Very sorry to hear of your loss, we also had our poorly 18 year old DC put to sleep last week, we miss him dearly, so I understand how empty you and your home must feel. We opted for a cremation, but not on his own as we did not want his ashes, I just find that to upsetting, it wouldn't have brought us any comfort. It's entirely an individual choice, as we made the decision a few years earlier when we lost our beloved dog, we made the same decision again.

Welshmaenad · 27/05/2017 10:48

I had to have my wonderful elderly cat PTS last week. Previously we had buried pets but I'm separated now and have a chronic pain condition so can't dig. I opted for individual cremation as I wanted her home.if you are planning to rescue another cat I think that is a fine tribute to your memories of your cat, and a help to two more cats - the one you rescue plus the one that can occupy the space you free up by rescuing. Personally is opt for individual cremation but it us totally up to you and a lovely idea whatever you decide.

Whatsername17 · 27/05/2017 10:49

Do what makes you feel better. I will be devestated when something happens to my two, but we will do group cremation. I'm a big believer that the body is just an empty shell, the soul moves onwards. I'm not even having a funeral - it's in my will that my body will go straight to the crematorium in a cardboard box. The whole thing costs about £600. Those left behind are to spend the 'funeral' money on a party or holiday and spread my ashes somewhere pretty.

SwimmingInLemonade · 27/05/2017 10:55

My two beloved cats are buried in the garden... just another thought if you want to keep him "with you" as it were. Ultimately though, whether you opt for individual or group cremation won't make a difference to his spirit. Just do whatever feels right to you. Flowers

Scandelicious · 27/05/2017 11:14

My mum buried our childhood cat in the garden and planted a rose bush on top. Are you allowed to do that these days? She later moved house but always liked the thought of someone enjoying the rose bush where the cat was buried

GreenPolishtoGo · 27/05/2017 11:24

I would do whatever feels best to you. Like Whatsername17 I regard a dead body as an empty shell so I would, and have, opted for group cremation in the past. My lovely cats live on in my memories of them.

Be kind to yourself. It is always hard to lose them.Flowers

DonttouchthatLarry · 27/05/2017 19:36

Whatever feels right for you. Not being insensitive (I've lost beloved horses, dogs and cats plus a much loved father!) but to me, once they're gone, they're gone - I don't 'do' ashes or grave visiting. Personally I would rather the money help needy cats who can be saved from suffering and have their lives improved.

I wouldn't even pay for group cremation, I don't have the ashes from any of my pets, but you should do whatever brings you the most comfort.

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