'But what about Syria'. Would I be unreasonable to tell this woman to go and fuck herself?

[Runny]

I have a Facebook friend who I think it's fair to say has some very extreme political views that she's not afraid to air. Normally I think live and let live, but she really gets her knickers in a knot over things like the Western bombings of Syria, refugees, Israel etc. I should say I'm also against the bombings in Syria and have donated to refugee charities.

Since the Paris terror attacks she's become very vocal about how Western media organisations ignore the terror attacks that happen in the Middle East, lots of 'why don't we change our FB profile pics to Palestinian flags' and the like. I let that go, even though I think she's talking out of her arse and it's blatantly obvious why our media focus on stuff happening in Europe. Since then with every terror attack that's happened she's posted similar stuff, even when the Westminster attacks happened the other week. This person lives in Central London so it bloody happened on her died doorstep and she was still at it even then!

Then yesterday arrived, my feed was full of comments about how awful and horrific the events in Manchester were. She was uncharacterstically quiet for most of the day, then late afternoon she posts a status 'I weep for the children, children everywhere'. What followed was a load of guff implying it was a 'false flag' designed to rig the election in the Tories favour. I hate the Tories as much as the next person, but come on that's just lunacy!

She's been at it most of the night, posts about fucking Syria, don't forget about Syria. Seriously, there's a time and a place for her crack pot opinions, and I really want to comment telling her she's a fucking insensitive idiot for spouting this now. WIBU to do this? She seems to have a complete empathy bypass. I'm so angry reading her posts, she posts this guff just hours after children have been blown to bits at a pop concert. What the hell is wrong with her?

You can believe what you like. But posting stuff like that on FB at the moment is - I'm not sorry to say it - hateful.

There was a poster on another thread - I could have predicted it - talking about sympathy for the bomber's family. At a time like this they put their fingers on the keyboard and typed that. Nice.

All of the suffering is horrific. The attack on Manchester was horrific; the fact that Syrian children die in Western airstrikes is no less horrific. Your friend has a point - as illustrated by your use of the phrase "posts about fucking Syria" (I do admire the irony of you describing her as a "fucking insensitive idiot", by the way). By November 2013, it has been calculated that over 11,000 children have died in the Syrian conflict. But, well, it's only "fucking Syria", isn't it?

She's right in what she says although she could have been a bit more sensitive timing wise. The Syrian people have been targeted and attacked over and over again for a long time yet most people I know turn a blind eye to their suffering because the Syrians are not European. Agree with other posters that the media coverage yesterday was vile, insensitive and patronising. I had to turn the tv off in the end because I couldn't bear watching it anymore. I suggest you do the same with your friend.

But she's right! What about the drone strikes in Syria?
We have blood on our hands too.
What happened in Manchester is terrible but it's not automatically more tragic because it happened on our soil so it's easier to empathise with the victims.
You cannot say definitively that false flags don't exist.
I don't think your friend is insensitive. I think she is just pointing out that these things do not happen in a vaccuum.

Believing that false flags exist is proper tin foil hat territory. I'm open minded, and I'm perfectly inclined to believe that cover ups occur far too often, but false flags? Really? Blowing your own people up just to rig an election?

Honestly believing in that crap is like believing in fairies and unicorns.

Surely it's entirely normal to feel more pain and loss when tragic events occur close to home, in situations we ourselves could easily have been in?

What exactly is required of us with regard to mourning Syrian children? Constant fb posts? Crying emojis?

The rolling news is mostly cringe inducing garbage but the event itself is truly shocking and upsetting. I can't apologise for being more moved when people who look like me, live like me, speak my language and live down the road are involved in mass murder than I am when it happens in a region I can't understand, will never visit, and which has reported mass deaths every week since I was old enough to watch the news.

The parents and family of those killed in Manchester or in Syria have had their lives destroyed. It doesn't matter where they live or where they were born. It's all just desperately sad. I understand that you may find your friend's posts upsetting OP but you can just unfriend her. You don't need to come on MN mouthing off about 'fucking Syria'. That's extremely disrespectful.

I think you're the one BU and insensitive OP.

Well she is entitled to her views but I agree with the 'empathy bypass' observation above. We do have the freedom to choose our friends and it sounds as though she has a mindset about this issue for some reason. So unless you think she may engage in illegal action I agree with those here who suggest that for your own peace of mind/blood pressure you 'unfriend' her.

I don't think your friend is a crackpot. I agree with her. But repeatedly making your point with post after post on Facebook is fairly annoying, and the time to be doing it is not in the aftermath of a huge atrocity. As pp have said, it's crass and insensitive. She's right though, and our country spends lots of money and effort on fucking up other countries under the guise of 'ousting tyrants', that our government was always happy enough with until they stop playing ball. We don't change our profile pics for them.

It is so so easy for people's individual horror and frustration to spill over into 'atrocity top trumps'. None of us is immune.
I feel for the children in Manchester.
I feel for the children in Syria. Who couldn't, in either case?
Yet I am aware of the difference in reportage levels, the horrible way our media reports incidents here (horrible because it feeds the terrorists), and I am always very watchful to see which politician is making capital out of tragedy (most of them :(

Your friend is a fanatic. We live in a peaceful democracy, as does most of western Europe. The middle East is full of malevolent dictators who dont really care about peace. Syria is in the middle of a civil war which we are unsuccessfully trying to stop and should possibly not be bothered trying to. Yes its terrible that children die there but there is nothing we can do to stop it.

This is why some cultures are just incompatible. Just unfriend her.

Maybe you should remind her that the same people that are killing children in Manchester are killing children in Syria.

I pointed out to a friend who was posting pictures of the children killed with 'Why is this happening to us???' Posts that the guy responsible had fled here with his family from Lybia, our government and the US were bombing their country not so long ago. It is fair to say if we keep bombing the middle east, killing civilians, displacing families, that some will end up in the UK and some will have an axe to grind. What is annoying is the way people go on about UK deaths when there have been millions killed elsewhere, it smacks of hypocrisy and the sentiment that their children are less important. Maybe her timing could be better, and obviously I have nothing but sympathy for the victims, but she is correct. False flags do exist look up historical military data such as operation northwoods. It happens, but not saying this is one.

it's entirely normal to feel more pain and loss when tragic events occur close to home, in situations we ourselves could easily have been in

More pain, of course it's normal. But I think the contrast is way too unbalanced.

What is annoying is the way people go on about UK deaths when there have been millions killed elsewhere

And this wins nicest post of the year. So people have been going on about the atrocity on Monday night? Going on. How very dare they.

This is why some cultures are just incompatible. Just unfriend her.

. I'd be unfriending YOU if I knew you on FB.

Cement, I'd say 'going on' was an understatement!

The media has been positively REVELLING in it.

Children die everywhere in the world every day. Why does Syria get more attention than all the wars in Africa? Hundreds of thousands of black Africans were slaughtered by the Arab Janjaweed and that hardly garnered any attention. And what is going on in Syria is mostly Sunni Muslim vs Shiite Muslim (with a bit of slaughter of Christians and Yazidis thrown in). The west is damned if it gets involved and damned if it doesn't. Not everything can be reduced to simple baddies and goodies. Every conflict is more complicated than the press like to make out.

I agree with her, tbh.

TheOnlyBoy and Muggle put this really well.
I must admit I know a lot of anti refugee types, and I'm so tempted to try to say to them "imagine this happening every day? You'd want out, right?" because they seem to have no empathy for "just Syria". But I can't say it because it will be taken wrong, like here.
The media is ridiculous in this country, and America.

People like her are fucking idiots.

Is it just as sad that children in Syria die? Yes.

Was it appropriate that yesterday, when something happened that close to home, that people's thoughts were with the children of Manchester?

Of course it fucking was.

What did you want the news to do exactly?

'Here's a picture of a victim of the bombing in Manchester.

But it's wrong to just focus on his me recent tragedy at the expense of all others.

Here's also a picture of a child that died in Syria last month after being shot by Isis. In the interest of fairness, here is one we bombed too.

Here's a picture of a newborn baby girl that was abandoned and died on her own because her parents wanted a boy.

Here's a picture of a young boy that was raped and murdered by his father.

Here's a....'

Just how much tragedy are we supposed to discuss in one go? How much is morally correct?

And to suggest that if we all cared about dead little children more maybe our own wouldn't get bombed is insensitive and batshit.

Isis don't want revenge for dead children. They kill the children of their own people themselves.

They want the collapse of the western world.

There is no such thing as a 'false flag' and anyone who thinks there is needs their head examining.

Of course there is, not saying anything about this event or recent ones but in the past they have happened and it's been proved when the documents were declassified. Look it up.

I agree with your friend. Why can we only empathise with people of our own country? Why do we turn a blind eye to Syria when we have so much involvement and meddle so much? Why is it disrespectful to discuss other countries' deaths and plight when we have just had a horrific disaster? It's probably a good time to talk about these things.

To the PP saying "they have crackpot dictators, there's nothing we can do about it" - oh, we have done plenty about it. Like ruin entire countries (Iraq)and fund "moderate opposition" groups that then go out of control.

If you don't like it, unfriend her. Don't whine about it here.