I know ibu but still

[koalabeartape]

I'm 15 weeks pregnant and told family a couple of weeks ago.

Was told this weekend that my sister is also pregnant.

We do not get on.

I know I'm being unreasonable and whatnot but I'm scared she's going to have a girl and I'm not.

Really coughing? I find that hard to believe. Why has it hurt your feelings, surly your daughters love you? I cannot see why such a comment can cause so much upset, it was a tongue in cheek comment to the Op joking around that if she had a boy all is not lost. Boys are wonderful too! I'm in no means saying girls are awful, girls and boys are wonderful. Healthy children are all we should aspire too.

Oh and Coughing I am sorry to cause you upset, next time I write a comment I will be think long and hard about it.

some people are more sensitive than others about this stuff, but then aibu is what it is.

i really wanted a girl and i was disappointed when i found out. my baby boy is now 4 weeks old and i couldn't imagine him any other way. wouldn't trade him for anything.

separately, you might want to not get into the habit of comparing and competing with your sister. that's going to be a draining and fruitless way to spend the literal rest of your life.

Oh you're alllowed to be offended about the boys loving their mums the most but others can't be offended about the ops comment about being disappointed if she has another son and her sister 'gets the girl'.

Awful. This gender disappointment shit always seems to point one way and it's time it stopped. Grow up and accept that when you are pregnant there is a 50% chance of either sex.

I have both so this isn't a 'boy' mum or 'girl' mum talking. It's hurtful either way.

I'm sorry what? You are worried that your sister will have a girl and then what? She loves her baby more? Other people think she's done better than you by having a girl? What exactly are you jealous of?
I'm afraid that I am very intolerant of this gender disappointment business, no matter how much of a real thing it is. If you want to be jealous of your sister you should find something other than the future sex of your children to be jealous about.
Best of luck with your new baby

I have as DS and would love a DD if I have another. I can well imagine my sister and I ending up in the same situation, and I'd be a little upset at the thought too (especially because she's the type to push princesses and pink). You know it's unreasonable, but emotions aren't always reasonable!

I understand your feelings OP, and I'm sorry you are getting a hard time on here. Just because they may not be rational doesn't mean that they are not real to you. I wanted a girl desperately the first time round, and I got a boy, who I now adore and couldn't imagine being without him. For my second, I wanted another boy because it seemed familiar and easier, and I got a girl, who again, I adore and couldn't live without. I know it seems hard now, but when your baby arrives you will love them regardless of what you have and what your sister has, and the feelings you have now will be long forgotten x

I personally couldn't have given less of a shit if I had a boy or a girl, I had a boy, he was very poorly, who I wanted was to take a child home from the hospital.

Not 'who' all I wanted.

In my experience, most families I've seen have 'Daddy's girls' and 'Mummy's boys". I think it may be a semi-Oedipus thing.

Having a gender preference isn't a horrible thing. I was hoping for a girl too... My aunt cried when she found out her 4th was a boy - she already has 3 and this was her last pregnancy!

In my experience, most families I've seen have 'Daddy's girls' and 'Mummy's boys". I think it may be a semi-Oedipus thing

And how big is your sample size? This is utterly ridiculous

Buster

"Oh and Coughing I am sorry to cause you upset, next time I write a comment I will be think long and hard about it."

Yes. Please do.
Saying "lighthearted" doesnt make idiotic comments any less idiotic.

Give it a rest Eminado Crikey some people need to chill out and sense of humor, is everything in your life taken so seriously? You sound like a complete bore tbh.

To whoever suggested that if my sister had a girl she would love her child more are you off your head.

Of course I would love my child as much as I love my other child but I am still allowed to be disappointed.

My sister is a bitch and so would push it in my face if she had a girl knowing that I wanted one but was never going to. I mean could keep trying and have a zillion children until I got a girl and use benefits and hand outs to pay for them but seeing as I can only afford two that's where I'll stop.

To those who "don't tolerate" gender disappointment you've obviously never experienced it

Can you arrange a private gender scan ahead of your anomaly to help you get your head around the likely sex, sooner OP?

I also thought Buster's 'helpful' comment was stupid and crass.

Peaface yes we are having an early gender scan so I can have some time to process it if it's not what I wanted rather than having disappointment at the birth

That's me, stupid and crass! I really went out of my way to upset the MNetters, and by Jove it was a piece of cake!

Op there's nothing wrong with how you're feeling.
A lot of people have gender preference and im sure you'll love your child no matter what you have.

no one loves their mother quite like a boy!
Isn't true in the slightest.

Peaface yes we are having an early gender scan so I can have some time to process it if it's not what I wanted rather than having disappointment at the birth
Probably a good idea op.

Buster you've clearly got nothing better to do on this lovely day than sit constantly on mn and stir up trouble.

Go out side and enjoy the day.

I'm in a very similar boat - we will just have to wait and see!

Oh ffs I have 2 dds and busters comment didn't bother me at all , it's just something people say , i honestly cant believe people are getting upset .

I read Buster's comment as a light hearted defence of boys in response to the OP. Bizarre to get more upset about that than the OP's own remarks and thinly veiled benefit bashing.