is this normal play for a 2.5 year old?

[bugsymalonemumof2]

So I dont feel like DD plays properly so before taking my concerns elsewhere i thought I would watch her and write down what she does..

Between 3pm and 7pm yesterday

she had happylsnd, football, cars, boxes, bags, a tent and her toy kitchen out. her train set, playmobil, babies, books and blocks were also in the room but on the shelves still.

• lined her cars up
• organised her boxes inside the tent
• put cars from box to boz
• threw her football several times

dinner

• put boxes inside the bags
• carries the bags around the lounge and bought them over to show me
• put her shoes on. put her shoes on her brother

bedtime routine started

She didnt once ask me to join in
She only once showed me something
Didnt once ask for help but when I offered she accepted

she didnt looj at any of the other stuff. If i Take away the boxes she might play with her toys in the sense she empties all of the storage tubs out. throws them around. she does do a little imaginative play but its very rigid. she always brings me tea and food from her kitchen. she always cleans her dolls bum, puts a clean nappy on and throws away the old one then puts baby to sleep. its very set, if that makes sense.

She only has about 30 words but i cant work out if she is playing right for 30 months

Sounds like how my little 2.5 year old plays and she is def not autistic

It's not always a bad outcome.

grumpy - is my DC with ASD and having learning diffs and not off to any uni ever a 'bad outcome'?

I didn't see that sorry ,

What does NT mean?

DS1 would play independently from an early age. He got a train set for his second birthday, we set it up and he spent two hours chuffing away without looking up. He'd arrange his cars on the garage. Play was quite simple and it's only in the last year at 6 that he's really got the hang of role play. His "thing" is building. He'd combine the trainset and duplo and build elevated tracks, then moved on to lego quite early.

He also had a speech delay. He picked up vocabulary early on then stalled at 2. The HVs felt that he was at the low end of normal then, but progression continued to be slow. He lost confidence and at 3.5 he could barely look at strangers, only talked to a select few, very trusted people and "sentences" were the minimal 3 to 4 words with no grammar. We had some intervention from SALT and he caught up over the next year ready for school. Now at 6, he merrily rabbits on about a variety of things to anyone.

I have had my worries about him, but he's just the type to do things in his own time and suddenly catch up when he's ready. We're now on to the stage of crawling painfully through learning to read and write... Throughout it all he's always been a very observant, thoughtful child with great comprehension of the world.

It is worrying when their development seems a bit off the usual patterns and may be indications of something or nothing.

My child had similar issues (severe language delay at age 3), I would strongly recommend these books as they were all v useful in different ways:-

www.jkp.com/uk/playing-laughing-and-learning-with-children-on-the-autism-spectrum.html

www.amazon.co.uk/You-Make-Difference-Helping-Child/dp/0921145063?tag=mumsnetforum-21 (Given you can get a second hand copy for £3 inc postage on amazon, PLEASE BUY ONE!)

www.amazon.co.uk/Parents-Guide-Speech-Language-Problems-x/dp/0071482458/ref=sr_1_fkmr0_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1495353622&sr=1-1-fkmr0&keywords=Parents+Guide+to+speech+and+language+difficulties&tag=mumsnetforum-21

I think you should go with your gut feeling- it sounds like your gut is telling you that there is something.

My sons at 2.5 had slow speech( 50 plus single words) - the key is not the amount of words, but if they are able to start linking them together E.g juice- cup or Dad- home.

My family thought I was a fussy mum( he was my first child ). I knew deep down something wasn't right - he was diagnosed with Speech and Language disorder- many still saying ( including Educational Pyschologist that he wasn't autistic, because he played with his younger sister). I honestly never thought he was autistic, as I thought autism would be more obvious .By 8 diagnosed with moderate autism ( at a specialist Autistic school now and a very happy child). Speech therapists are the ones that can normally spot early signs, but are reluctant/ or possibly not allowed to diagnose.

The way you describe your little girls play is not a concern- perhaps most little girls might be showing you more things, but she is doing a bit of role play which is good. The thing that would concern me is her understanding- you should be noticing an improvement each month in this area- speech being slow is not really a problem. Understanding is the key.

Push your Health visitor for a full assessment - very scary/ emotionally time. But kids that get the right support when very young do much better in the long run.

Children are all so different and many develop in slightly different ways and might need more support/ understanding along the way.

You may be(I know I was!) unpleasantly surprised that Speech Therapy is no magic bullet - but more a collaborative effort, with the Speech Therapist assessing and giving advice, with parents/carers putting in the day to day work. So getting clued up yourself before assessments is v worthwhile, as you'll be putting in the work to help bring language/communication on, anyway.

My child also had severe receptive language delay at 3. I stripped back my speech, caveman style and had a bit of an OTT "mommy" voice, and used visuals/gestures to give him as much chance as possible to figure out what I was saying.

Please, please tell us she's had a hearing assessment? Properly, not HV check.

Her speech does need some assessment I would think. Have you got a SALT referral?

Does your DD have any favourite films/TV programs - as I found that 1)was a good way in to getting my DS to concentrate on books and 2)the toys led him to develop more imaginative play.

oh and yes, very good point from HP, it's routine for children with any sort of language delay to have a hearing test by audiology dept to rule out any hearing related cause.

If you have other concerns about her behaviour than I would go to your GP or HV armed with your concerns, if that is the only thing, nothing to worry about IMHO.

we had this exchange yesterday

she bought up a lion to me and went 'roar'
I responded 'yes a lion'
her reply was 'no mine'

or if you ask her a yes no question it looks half the time like she is just guessing an answer.

It all just feels odd

she is on the list for a hearing assessment but again thats a 7 month wait and she was referred in feb!

coffeemachine and fanjo I am so sorry. My post was thoughtless & I shouldn't have written it so quickly.

I suppose what I meant was you can have a very wide range of outcomes with ASD. I remember being incredibly worried when we went through the diagnosis with DS all those years ago. But however things would have turned out we would have loved and supported him the same.

It can be hard to differentiate between language delay and language disorder at a young age and both can present as ASD because without language the social communication is poor.

However whatever it 'is' early intervention is beneficial. I'd focus on asking what you can do to help her at this stage. Focus on who will support her and how once she starts ore school.
The assessment will look at your DD as a whole and make a bigger picture and will determine if it's asd or something else.

My ds is 12 and has asd. At a young age he had a lot of repetitive behaviours (still does but they don't tend to have so many toys at his age!).
What I did was rotate them. So I'd have 2/3 things in lounge and put other boxes away. I found he tended to focus better on one thing if there wasn't other stuff to tip on the floor and I could focus language on certain things or topics that week.

bugsy - my ds used to get language a bit skewiff - eg. in teletubbies there was a sequence about a sad lamb "the little lamb was sad". So DS thought the word "sad" was the world for "lamb". Just keep plugging away, repeating the right word, or extending "Lion roar", maybe pointing at the lion while you say lion, however unnatural it feels at first.

Thank you fanjo for you too.

argh this is goimg to be such a long few months :(

trying really hard to plough on with supporting her but its hard when she wont sit still for more than 2 seconds ever and unless its boxes or tv she doesnt conventrate on anything!