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Original poster

Paying for smashed TV

169 replies

Lovelilies · 19/05/2017 10:49

Help quick!
Bit of a dilemma. DS (3.5) playing at friend's house this morning with her DS also 3. I live 2 doors down and had just nipped home for something. The TV got smashed. The Mum says she saw my DS throw a toy plane at the TV.
Background, their TV got smashed last week when the 2 boys were alone in their lounge, it was assumed the other boy did it as he has 'form' for breaking things. My DS likes to play with him. He's pretty non verbal so have to go by what my DS says.
Now I wasn't there when it happened this time. My DS says the other boy did it. I do realise he's 3, and may tell fibs. I don't really think my DS did it, but like I say I wasn't here and the other Mum says she saw it.
So I have given her £230 (what she thought he TV cost).
Now her dick head partner is kicking off saying it cost £320 and I need to give them more money..
help!! ConfusedSad

OP posts:
MackerelOfFact · 19/05/2017 12:43

Sorry, £230. But still. That's a lot of money for a TV that keeps smashing.

Bluntness100 · 19/05/2017 12:46

Would you really charge another parent if a child accidently broke something in your home???????

I wouldn't and haven't, but I think if you can't afford to replace the item then it's fair enough. On the flip side if my child broke something in Someone's home I'd insist on paying.

expatinscotland · 19/05/2017 12:48

If her partner comes and threatens I'd actually call the police.

steff13 · 19/05/2017 12:49

Wow your DS has some superhuman strength if he can throw a toy plane (plastic I presume?) so hard against a telly on the wall that he smashes the screen.

This ^^ I am extremely skeptical that your son was able to throw a toy plane hard enough to smash a television screen. What was this plane made of? Certainly a plastic toy plane wouldn't have done it, even if it was thrown hard.

taratill · 19/05/2017 12:50

Bluntness I would also insist on paying however the OP paid the amount that was originally stated to be the cost and there seems to be some doubt as to whether this actually happened.

What I think is the cheek is that

a) they ask her to pay for it in the first place.
b) they are being heavy handed in trying to get her to pay more without proving the price/ where there is an element of doubt.

c) this is a 3 year old FFS and accidents happen.
d) it is not the OP's fault the family does not have insurance to cover accidental damage.

I would not allow my child to go back there.

AwaywiththePixies27 · 19/05/2017 12:52

Gosh. I supervise my DS and he's 8!

Who the hell leaves a couple of unsupervised 3yos to break things get on with things. Confused

WhatchaMaCalllit · 19/05/2017 12:52

Between 10:49 and 10:51 she borrowed the remainder of the money from another 'friend' to be able to afford a tv??? I smell a rat.

I'm in agreement that she (and her partner) have to assume some responsibility for (a) not having insurance for the contents of their house and (b) not removing and offending toys from the toy box that could cause damage to not just a tv but to other items, e.g. a vase or picture in their house.

Am I wrong in thinking that some of the cable tv operators are offering free 32" TV's if you subscribe? Could you suggest that and then they could put the money that you've given them off the first few months subscription???

hellomoon · 19/05/2017 12:53

I wouldn't and haven't, but I think if you can't afford to replace the item then it's fair enough. On the flip side if my child broke something in Someone's home I'd insist on paying.

This.

The main issue to me is that the OP is not sure if her friend is telling the truth or not. If she's not in the business of lying, then the OP can be sure that her child did break the tv. On that basis, I think she should offer to pay for a full replacement of the tv that's broken and it's up to the friend to decide if she wants to take it. given that they only bought the TV a week ago, then it should be pretty easy to prove how much it cost.

Personally, I wouldn't ask for the money - but I would be peeved if an offer wasn't made (which I would refuse) as this would be a demonstration that my friend appreciated that I'd be out of pocket. I'd accept that accidents happen but then I could afford to replace it myself. That might not be the case for the friend here.

lottiegarbanzo · 19/05/2017 13:01

Your child minding arrangement is with your friend, not her partner. So don't speak to him. Insist you will speak only to her.

It's her responsibility, she was the adult in charge. 3yo's are not responsible for their actions. You don't operate him by remote control, therefore you bear no responsibility for this accident.

In your shoes I'd be very upset that my child had been left unsupervised and allowed to get into such a dangerous situation. Broken glass, falling TV? Horrific.

That, in my view, is the central issue here. Your friend should be mortified and deeply apologetic.

You've made the mistake of offering a goodwill gesture that has been misconstrued as an admission of responsibility. Nice but naive of you, given who she lives with.

SweetLuck · 19/05/2017 13:10

I would not pay.

SweetLuck · 19/05/2017 13:11

In your shoes I'd be very upset that my child had been left unsupervised and allowed to get into such a dangerous situation. Broken glass, falling TV? Horrific.

This

paddlenorapaddle · 19/05/2017 13:14

I smell scam stay well away you've paid what you can end of

FreeNiki · 19/05/2017 13:16

Say to her my son says it wasnt him and you shouldn't have left them unsupervised. Ive given an adequate amount of money now if i receive any more demands I'll consider this harrassment.

then block them all

TheWitTank · 19/05/2017 13:18

I also call total bullshit here.
They want you to pay off their new TV.

SandyDenny · 19/05/2017 13:23

Of course 'people' can afford insurance if they can afford £230/£320 for a television! They just have the wrong priorities.

How can you know if that's true?

Do you know how much the insurance might be - maybe it's £1000 or more and they can't afford it? Unless you know the people nd all their financial situation it's nonsense to say that.

It sounds fishy to me, it's a shame you've already paid anything, there's no way you should pay anymore

IloveBanff · 19/05/2017 13:32

JigglyTuff Yes, but the OP can hardly accuse the mother of leaving them unsupervised if she claims to have seen the OP's DS do it, unless she doesn't mean left them on their own when she says 'unsupervised' but only that she didn't stop them throwing things around. If the mother claims to have been in the room at the time, then the question is why she allowed the throwing of hard objects. If she wasn't in the room, she should have been. Theyre 3 yrs old. She's lucky that the OP has paid her £230 IMO.

thatwouldbeanecumenicalmatter · 19/05/2017 13:36

I live in a shithole high crime area and my insurance incl building is a bit over £100 and that's incl I told them someone is in during the day, we have kids, pets and a smoker in the house. You prioritise or you take extra care (preferably both)

OP if her partner comes round do not open the door to him. If he starts shouting and threatening call the police.

I agree with others it sounds like he's put her up to this. Angry

elephantscansing · 19/05/2017 13:39

Two TVs smashed in a week?? She needs to supervise more...

Not your fault they don't have insurance. I wouldn't pay her any more. Or go round to see her either.

Agree with others: how can a 3yo throw a plastic toy hard enough at a wall-mounted TV to smash it??

AnneElliott · 19/05/2017 13:39

So did she get a new one last week when the other kid broke it? And who paid for that one?

viques · 19/05/2017 13:45

£230 is enough for a new TV, it might not be the one they want but if you want to replace like for like you get insurance.

SaorAlbaGuBrath · 19/05/2017 13:47

£230 is more than enough for a new tv!

BluePeppers · 19/05/2017 13:47

I think that you are already very generous to have paid so much.
She was the one in charge of your ds and as the afuitbtgere she is also the one responsible. Sorry but the issue is that she filed in her supervision of two 3yo.

Besides, your ds might have broken the TV. You don't know as you weren't there. But it might well be that the other boy did esp knowing that there is history there and she is telling lies.
If her DH is as a bully as you say, she might well have 'needed' someone to blame for a second TV broken in two weeks!

itchi · 19/05/2017 13:47

Neither of my kids even attempted to lie until they were at least four years old. If they'd done something they'd look sheepish but didn't seem able to lie and I'm sure it's a normal developmental thing that kids under fourish usually don't lie. I'd be inclined to believe my 3 year old over this.

fannydaggerz · 19/05/2017 13:50

I'm wondering if her partner has told her to ask you for money.

I would never ask, even if I didn't have insurance (which I do) I would never ask someone to replace it in the situation you've described.

muckypup73 · 19/05/2017 13:50

It is funny all this happened whilst you were away for 2 mins, if her telly got smashed last week and another child was blamed and that parent stumped up for the telly, whos tosay that she still has the broken one from last week and replaced her new telly with the old broken one whilst you had nipped home? could be a con artist......2 tellies smashed in a week?

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