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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed she's weird with money?

33 replies

Bitsnnoyed7777 · 15/05/2017 19:10

Friend is weird with money even though we're on the same and live together - no dependents etc. Case in point this eve, I get food got us and he pays me back but deliberately underpays by like £2. I don't care but this happens every time!! I buy more rounds etc etc. Fed up

OP posts:
Original poster
Bitsnnoyed7777 · 15/05/2017 19:10

Sorry should say he!

OP posts:
wowfudge · 15/05/2017 19:11

Tell him that unless he pays his fair share, you are going to only buy food and drink for yourself. Or take it in turns.

AyeAmarok · 15/05/2017 19:12

"That's £2 short buddy."

Then he can explain why, and you can agree or not, depending.

Job done.

Siwdmae · 15/05/2017 19:12

So either stop getting him stuff or ask for the money up front. Or, if he underplays you, tell him and ask for the rest. If he doesn't have it, get it off him next time.

NellieFiveBellies · 15/05/2017 19:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hibbledobble · 15/05/2017 19:14

Why does he deliberately underpay you?

Some people have different attitudes towards money, often due to their upbringing. It's fine for him to be frugal, but not for him to expect you to sub him.

Original poster
Bitsnnoyed7777 · 15/05/2017 19:14

I'm such a pushover, he said he would give it to me and I said oh it's fine as I can't bear to be the sort of person who scrabbles after 2 quid. It's not a nice trait though

OP posts:
Original poster
Bitsnnoyed7777 · 15/05/2017 19:14

Said he miscalculated Confused

OP posts:
ChicRock · 15/05/2017 19:15

When you say to him "you're £2 short there" what does he do?

Supersoaryflappypigeon · 15/05/2017 19:17

Start telling him everything is £4 more than it actually is.

thatwouldbeanecumenicalmatter · 15/05/2017 19:21

Jeez I'd be tempted to get the WD40 out and put in in front of him, and tell him you've noticed the squeaking when he walks. Shame the bugger, can't stand tight gits who happily spend your money.

thatwouldbeanecumenicalmatter · 15/05/2017 19:25

I bet he never 'miscalculates' and pays you too much...

NellieFiveBellies · 15/05/2017 19:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Etymology23 · 15/05/2017 19:26

Can I suggest using "splitwise" as a practical measure? It adds up what you owe each other so you can keep track, and you can adjust the split by % or shares or amounts. Makes it much harder to underpay and also means fewer individual payments.

Butterymuffin · 15/05/2017 19:33

I like supersoary's idea. But you know you need to get over saying 'oh it's fine'. Don't say that. Ask for your money. Also, stop buying rounds, or joint food. Say 'I think it's easier if we each get our own'.

Lochan · 15/05/2017 19:36

Stop buying him food up front. Get the money or let him buy his own.

When it's his round in the pub don't but for him.

Hedgehogparty · 15/05/2017 19:37

Just buy your own food and drink from now on.
This sort of meanness would stop me wanting to go out with him though anyway.

PeachyPip · 15/05/2017 20:50

I said oh it's fine as I can't bear to be the sort of person who scrabbles after 2 quid

But you clearly are and you aren't being honest about it with him or yourself either. Are you worried he will judge you as being mean?

If you want the money just ask him for it at the time. I wouldn't feel embarrassed about it. I'm happy to be generous when I want to be but it's on my terms not theirs. It would bug me if someone did this and I think if someone is bugging me then I should tell them why so that they have a chance to put it right.

Original poster
Bitsnnoyed7777 · 16/05/2017 11:00

Yes I'm a v generous person and I don't want to be judged as being mean I think. But also this whole viewpoint of constantly leaving me short (which this person seems to do a lot) is completely alien to me

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harderandharder2breathe · 16/05/2017 11:03

Stop letting him get away with it

He's the cheap one, not you

Kateallison16 · 16/05/2017 11:13

Im sure he is capable of buying his own food. Let him and just get your own. Problem solved.

Original poster
Bitsnnoyed7777 · 16/05/2017 11:15

It's always with things like takeaways. He'll suggest I get it then he'll transfer - but when it's the opposite, he'll round up my share and When he's paying me it's a few quid short

OP posts:
Original poster
Bitsnnoyed7777 · 16/05/2017 11:15

It's frustrating cos we're on very similar money and both saving for the future. He's just a massive tightwad

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CrazedZombie · 16/05/2017 11:53

You need to alternate paying for the takeaways if you are too embarrassed to chase it up. I bet he's doing it on purpose.

Unhomme · 16/05/2017 12:01

Tell him it's £2 more than it is. That way he underpays but you're not out of pocket.

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