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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think we're not rolling in it financially?

84 replies

FannyShmeller · 10/05/2017 20:57

That's what we earn between us. I have a baby due in November. First DC. £45K a year between us.

A friend of mine thinks I must be rolling in it, as apparently 45K is beyond her wildest dreams. They're honest people - I can't imagine them cheating the system. Yet they earn considerably less, she works part time and they have money for treats, holidays etc. I'm a bit Confused... I obviously must be doing something wrong! Yet they live in the same area and their rent is the same.

Our rent is £1150 pcm. Including anything utility bill reacted, that's about £1350.. I have included council tax etc in that amount.

Childcare is £60 a day Shock That is over £1200 a month.

We live and work within London, yet travel isn't cheap either. That's another £££ a week gone.

We shop a very basic Aldi shop, and even then will have to closely watch pennies when paying for childcare.

We have no money for treats. Not at all.

AIBU to say we're far from rolling in it? We would seriously consider moving out but DH just started a new career turn and he can't up sticks right now due to just starting, he needs to work in this job for a while. I can move jobs (NHS), fairly easily, I guess... I just hope it'll be easier when we are finally able to move out of the City.

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honeysucklejasmine · 10/05/2017 20:59

You earn considerably more thanks household, but your bills are huge compared to ours. It's all relative, isn't it?

FannyShmeller · 10/05/2017 21:01

honey Oh yes, definitely. If we lived outside of London on that wage, I can imagine things would be a lot breezier.

It's the rent (small 1 bed flat), and childcare that's the biggest killer.

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jarhead123 · 10/05/2017 21:02

Your utilities seem cheap, £200 for gas electricity water and council tax?

It's all relative.

Our income is around 50k and although we have a good life, we certainly aren't wealthy and have to budget etc

unlimiteddilutingjuice · 10/05/2017 21:02

"Childcare is £60 a day. That is over £1200 a month"

"she works part time"

Theres your answer.They have considerably lower childcare costs than you.

Pinkheart5917 · 10/05/2017 21:04

It is absolutely all relative.

I don't personally think 45k a year is that much tbh, and wouldn't say you were rolling in it.

SquidgeyMidgey · 10/05/2017 21:05

It's all relative. We have decent money coming in but our mortgage and insurances are high. We don't have the disposable income someone with lower expenses sees they would have with our income.

ineedamoreadultieradult · 10/05/2017 21:06

Its all relative. To me £45k is rolling in it and an unachievable dream fot me and DH, for others its normal, for others its a pittance. People are all different, its hardly breaking news.

early30smum · 10/05/2017 21:06

45K total before tax in London is definitely not rolling in it. You have my sympathy- childcare is so expensive, ours was more than £60 a day though. Shock do you know what she does for childcare?

HermioneJeanGranger · 10/05/2017 21:09

It's all relative isn't it?

45k is over double what we earn combined, but our mortgage is only £300 a month.

You can't compare incomes, just what's left over after the essentials.

Firenight · 10/05/2017 21:10

£45k in London isn't that great, especially if you have no family help with childcare. If you have a commute eating up a massive chunk too (as we do) then that hurts.

I tend to figure that others are probably running on credit cards, have family help, inheritance I don't know about.

Girlwiththearabstrap · 10/05/2017 21:10

YANBU. I don't think you're rolling in at all, especially living in London. Its all relative though isn't it, people's own salaries/outgoings are going to decide their opinion.

Crumbs1 · 10/05/2017 21:11

No, not rolling in it. Our eldest two earn nearly that at young unmarrieds and we still subsidise them a bit.

FannyShmeller · 10/05/2017 21:12

I may be a bit over £60 a day childcare for DC and I have toned utilities down a bit in cost since I didn't want any '' are you with the cheapest provider? '' comments (We are).

Friend has a childminder for childcare.

A PP says there's my answer - she works part time. But surely working less hours won't see me better off financially, will it?

It's so hard when you see others on significantly less income with more disposable income. I just don't know how they do it. I'm not saying they're better off etc, but. I'm genuinely curious. I really have to cut my cloth accordingly and budget carefully. Yet there seems to be so many friends of mine, open about their partners wage etc, that have more disposable income than me by what seems hundred and hundred of pounds per year.

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ToastyFingers · 10/05/2017 21:13

It's all relative. We get by fine on about half that, things are tight sometimes, but we're good at budgeting and nobody goes without essentials.

45k would give us an extra 20-odd thousand pound a year (before tax obviously) so we would have a few nice holidays a year, a decent car and lots of treats then (and I'd probably be as big as a house, as I could indulge all my foodie obsessions).

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHorrid · 10/05/2017 21:14

Shock your utilities are £200 a month. Our council tax is over £200 a month (total utilities is £500).
Cheap council tax is one of the money related benefits of living in London. - misses point of thread.

I don't think 45K is rolling in it, not for London. But probably a fortune to lots of people.

curlii103 · 10/05/2017 21:14

I used to earn that on my own living in lon and I wasn't rolling in it! Sorry only advice i have is to do what I did and move somewhere cheaper!

Topseyt · 10/05/2017 21:15

We live in Essex, about 40 miles out of London. We have a similar income to you and sure aren't rolling in it either.

Hang on in there though. It does get better when the kids get older and childcare is no longer needed.

FannyShmeller · 10/05/2017 21:15

Toasty But would you be that much better off on that wage working on London? London travel, London property prices.

I could live on a lot less than £45K quite easily away from London.

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FannyShmeller · 10/05/2017 21:17

WhenSheWas You're right, out utility and council tax etc is much more than the initial sum I gave but I didn't want any Hmm comments accusing me of overly playing what it costs, hence me toning it down.

It's so expensive here, yet I cannot move away (just yet). Oh Lord save me and cast me a job elsewhere for DH and I Sad

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NeverTooOldForAnything · 10/05/2017 21:20

It's probably not a lot in London. Where I live (north east) you can rent a 3 bed semi detached in a decent area for about £700/800 month. You can also find much, much cheaper accommodation if you're not particular about the neighbourhood. Full time nursery is around £140/week.

Childcare is definitely a big part of the budget, especially in London. You have my sympathy.

2014newme · 10/05/2017 21:20

No, the average salary is,£27k so your household income is below average as two earners average would be £54k.we would struggle on that

Dumbo412 · 10/05/2017 21:21

How do you pay bills and council tax out of £200ish?

We pay less rent £1000 but our council tax is £141 a month.

No 45 k isn't rolling in it.
A few years ago if DH was earning 25k I'd have felt rich, he earns closer to 60k now. Still not rolling in it.

Child are and rent will be your biggest outgoings.

RandomMess · 10/05/2017 21:27

Does your friend get some housing benefit towards her rent? Does she get tax credits etc.? If she does she needs to add them up and then gross them upwards in order to compare what her household income is compared to yours!

It could well be very similar once you take into account childcare as well...

BluePeppers · 10/05/2017 21:28

The average wage in the uk is £26k.
You are both working full time and are earning a total that is below the average wage for two working people.
So that in itself would tell me that you are not 'rolling in it'. That's wo going in about being in London.

Re why you seem to struggle and they don't.... very hard to say TBH (I assume they also have a child requiring childcare?)
But what I would do is to sit down and look at how spend your money. There might be areas where actually you are spending more than you could/should, leaving more spare cash for things that would matter to you.

FannyShmeller · 10/05/2017 21:28

Dumbo We pay quite a bit more than that, it wasn't an accurate figure at all

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