To think we're not rolling in it financially?

[FannyShmeller]

That's what we earn between us. I have a baby due in November. First DC. £45K a year between us.

A friend of mine thinks I must be rolling in it, as apparently 45K is beyond her wildest dreams. They're honest people - I can't imagine them cheating the system. Yet they earn considerably less, she works part time and they have money for treats, holidays etc. I'm a bit ... I obviously must be doing something wrong! Yet they live in the same area and their rent is the same.

Our rent is £1150 pcm. Including anything utility bill reacted, that's about £1350.. I have included council tax etc in that amount.

Childcare is £60 a day That is over £1200 a month.

We live and work within London, yet travel isn't cheap either. That's another £££ a week gone.

We shop a very basic Aldi shop, and even then will have to closely watch pennies when paying for childcare.

We have no money for treats. Not at all.

AIBU to say we're far from rolling in it? We would seriously consider moving out but DH just started a new career turn and he can't up sticks right now due to just starting, he needs to work in this job for a while. I can move jobs (NHS), fairly easily, I guess... I just hope it'll be easier when we are finally able to move out of the City.

They might just be more comfortable with debt, so juggling credit cards and taking out interest free credit on consumer goods etc. My friend seemed to be doing a lot with her income and then I saw her credit card bill!

I don't know how your friend is making her money stretch so far either...but you never know what goes on behind the scenes in other people's' lives. Perhaps she's massively in debt? Perhaps she gets handouts from relatives? Perhaps, as you suggested, she's "fiddling the system". I wouldn't waste any more time worrying about it.

As far as your own situation is concerned...I feel for you. London swallows up disposable income...and not-so-disposable income until you are bled dry, and once you build a career there it is so hard to leave. But don't let yourself become a prisoner. If you want to leave and have no particular fondness for the place then do it sooner rather than later. It only gets harder if you put it off. DH did it, and was so relieved. He had to take a big pay cut, but was immediately better off in terms of what he could afford, and much happier.

my council tax over 230 a month and i earn less than 18k i wish i was rolling in it with 45k

Random, Yes she does get child tax credits/working tax etc.

We are entitled to 0, but we will be entitled to child benefit, of which I included in my original figures

DH and I earn £110k between us but our mortgage is £1050 per month (we choose to overpay though so actually pay £1600) and childcare is £600 per month (3 days a week for one DC but I'm on mat leave now so second DC will start next year). So double what you earn but our costs are less. It's where you live. We're in Scotland.

Is that £45 gross or net? I had assumed the former and that's the case then no, definitely not rolling it by any stretch.

I would guess at that awkward middle where there's very no help because you're not on a low income, but you're not on a high income either and living somewhere quite expensive.

How much do you earn OP out of that £45k? Would it be worth one of you working part time, reducing childcare costs and claiming tax credits?

I imagine that is why your friend with similar outgoings but less income is doing better than you? Or she is getting handouts from parents. I know people in their fifties who have had parental handouts (thousands of pounds every year) from their parents.

It's definitely where we live, it's just making the move that's the tricky part.

Our families live in quite expensive areas too and we were prepared to up sticks and move to Lincolnshire - That way we could afford a mortgage in a few years and the houses are lovely/nice friendly areas.

Trouble is, DH just started a new career path and it will end up very good salary wise. But, he's literally just started there and I can't see how he can just move elsewhere now, he needs to develop. Furthermore, how do you take time away for interviews etc if they're miles and miles away? What if you go to loads and don't get the job? What then - you only get so much annual leave.

I work for the NHS and I'm hoping it will be easier for me to move hospitals. But I too am new to the job (Medical Secretary).

Bugger The £45K is before tax etc.

happy I earn £21K out of that £45K. Would it be worth dropping days and going part time?

Really appreciate all this helpful input anyway

You may actually be better off without working- have you done the sums?
How much do you and your dh both get per month after tax, national insurance, pension, students loan etc have been taken off?
Whichever is the lowest of these, then subtract £1200 for he childcare, plus work out how much that person spends on transport for work per month and subtract that. What are you left with?

On a couple of 22k salaries in London, private renting, and with childcare costs too, no you're the opposite.

Me and my dad are on less than 15k between us!
45k sounds like a ton, and your utilities are cheaper than ours too.
We both have overdrafts and i have a credit card we rely on just for essentials like food and paying the electricity.

Does indeed sound like childcare is your issue eating up all your income.

Haha! what an amusing contrast between this thread and another one from not long ago where Mumsnetters were falling over themselves to tell op that she had riches beyond their wildest dreams (even though her combined household income was below the average).

I'm certain a lot of these threads are started by trolls political researchers. You don't see so many of them when there isn't an Election on the horizon.

Childminders are usually a lot cheaper than nurseries, plus if they are getting tax credits then they may well be getting help with their rent and council tax.

d2 My salary is the lowest, it's £21k a year so about £1300 a month after pension contributions and tax etc.

As childcare is £1200 and travel around £140 a month... I think you're right. I may well be better off working or am I missing something?

£45k combined could be a £20k and a £25k income. Which is below UK average salary and quite a lot below London I believe.

Saying £45k household income it sounds like a lot but broken down, not so much so.

bibbit I'm not a bloody politician/nosey journo combo. In truth, I know fuck all about politics/government policies.

I'm just someone trying to work out where I'm going wrong financially

Sad to say this but yes- you're actually losing money by working

£60 a day on childcare when you are only earning 21 K is so much but like I said before- childcare in London is crazy. I assume your child goes to a day nursery and you pay 51 weeks a year? By my maths, that's £15,300 a year? You are basically working for almost nothing (financially). There was a short period of time (6 months) where I actually paid to go to work (by a few pounds a month). I did it because I wanted to keep my options open work wise but financially it was very very hard. I really feel for you OP.

You're friend will also be getting tax credits. That's where the money is.

Worth applying for housing benefit/council tax benefit once the baby arrives too, you may not get much but you could get a little bit.

Working part time gives you more time to shop cheaply etc. so there are pros and cons.

However, think about your pension - it's my biggest regret in taking a career break! Thank goodness I can claim on DH's pension if we ever divorce as mine is pretty worthless

It's where you live / nursery . Your not doing anything wrong !!

I live alone with dc and earn about 25k less and can stretch to the same things as your friend . However if I had your outgoings id be about 1100 a month short 😂

Think about the money youl have spare once it's school and not nursery !!

Use the tax credit calculator or the entitled to website to see what you would get if you didn't work or cut your hours. I wonder if you would get housing benefit too?

I am not sure but am sure you could find out by doing a bit of research.

Your friend may simply have bought her house 15 or more years ago before house prices went crazy. We are in a much better position than some friends partly because of that.

Comparison is the thief of joy and all that.

My top tip would be make the spreadsheet now comparing earnings and childcare costs in every possible combination, so you can make an informed decision. Also, look at childcare in detail now. Then you don't have to make a rush decision. Have you checked NHS nurseries? Some of the ones near us are subsidised, or at least, they used to be.

"But surely working less hours won't see me better off financially, will it?"

It depends very much on your circumstances. How much can you earn? What are your childcare costs? and what benefits you might be entitled to?

When I crunched the numbers on my return to work I found that after childcare costs I would have roughly the same disposable income working full time as part time.
Plus working full time would have left me heavily dependant on the childcare element of tax credits.

I negotiated a job share.