To ask for your honest experiences of holidaying abroad with toddler

[NoSandPlease]

DH wants us to go on holiday this summer with 22 month old DD. The thought brings me out in a cold sweat!

It's a 4 hour flight, with a coach transfer. 5-star hotel all inclusive (beach resort). He thinks it will be relaxing and good for all of us. I think it will be exhausting and very stressful.

DD hates sitting still. She wants to run, climb, explore constantly. She's a fussy eater and will only sit in a highchair for 5-10mins. She wakes around 5am every day. DH is not good with early mornings and never volunteers to get up with her at 5am (he rarely gets up before 8).

I'm worried about how we'll keep her happy on flight, coach, in hotel room, how we'll fill the time during day. I feel exhausted thinking about it!

I suggested a week in UK but DH is adamant we should go somewhere warm. I feel we should wait until she is older. I'm happy for DH to go abroad without us if he wants a relaxing beach break, but he wants us to come.

WWYD?

*you're

I agree with lionsleepstonight; the issue is lack of support (I won't call it "help" as it's 50% his responsibility).

Could you go with friends or family just to give you a bit more confidence if it's your first trip and extra help with the travel & transfers? xxx

I agree too - have a serious chat with him before you book anything x

My son sounds a lot like your DD when he was that age and we haven't (and wouldn't) do a holiday abroad in a hotel.

It's all very well people saying take books/snacks/they'll nap in the buggy etc but you know your child and some children are simply not like that- DS certainly wasn't and still isn't although it's easier now he's 3.5.

We do UK holidays (not huge distances in the car) in self catering cottages with gardens. It means we have the option of eating at the cottage/don't need to worry about disturbing others etc.

We've been every year since he was 8 months - first year was a nightmare but every year since has been lovely. Can go out and do things with him during the day and then keep.his bedtime routine in the evening. Once he's in bed, we can then relax ourselves.

Personally, I'd do UK until she's a bit older.

Sorry but you need to be stronger about him getting up with your LO. It's his responsibility as much as yours. Perhaps agree on the understanding that he will do every Sunday for a month or something beforehand so he can prove he really will do it. also why not pick somewhere with a shorter flight? There are lovely places just 2-2.5 hrs with shorter transfers. The flight is stressful there's no denying that.

We went on a lovely all inclusive with 2 under 3s and had an amazing time. We agreed to alternate lie ins in advance but tbh the kids slept in anyway as they were having late nights. That was a few years ago and we would love to go again.

All inclusive was great because they can eat as much or as little as they want without you feeling like you've wasted money and ice cream is included. If it's family friendly there are likely to be toys and activities and a crèche frvv vvvv4 for your daughter but shop around for the best family friendly hotel. The restaurant will understand a if she can't sit still for lone. Sharing a room is a bit of nightmare though. We had ours stay up quite late( the baby would sleep in buggy) and then went up about 9-10 and had an hour on the balcony but we basically made the holiday about the daytimes.

On the other hand though 22 months is a really tough age and if you waited until she was 3 there would probably be kids clubs and things she could join in and she would probably be easier to manage so perhaps a compromise would be UK holiday this year and abroad next year with the proviso that he steps up and does his share of mornings. Don't let him get away with never getting up with your daughter that's so unfair!

I took DS abroad a lot as a single parent, from 18 months onwards. Typically resorts in Menorca, Lanzarote etc with a coach transfer. It was slightly awkward getting through security at the airport etc trying to manage pram/baby/milk but as you will be travelling with another adult I'm sure that part will be grand.

I would say go for it, but obvs a lot depends on the child and whether they will nap, cope with the heat etc

I found that DS got a bit fed up with the buffet food but he managed ok. It's difficult to do much in the evenings with a toddler but I always quite enjoyed reading on the balcony with a glass of wine after he went to bed.

Sounds like you've already made up your mind that it's going to be too much hard work.... But my advice would be go for it. We took our 23 month old to Sri Lanka this spring and she loved it, she was so much more adaptable that I'd ever given her credit for. We travelled between three stunning beaches and family guest houses. Visited temples, travelled in tuktuks etc. Yes it's harder than without a toddler but meant we got the holiday we wanted and at the same time It was gorgeous quality family time that you'll never get again at that age. Her language came on incredibly whilst we were away, and having a handful of toys, a few books a pool/sea was all we needed to entertain her. Bonus is under two things are soo much cheaper/free!

Have u tried Centre Parcs? That's good for kids of that age the swimming is great and you could get a nice comfortable lodge with 2 bedrooms giving you more space at night than in a hotel room. My brother took his 2 there when they were that age and we went with them a few times. There are lots of play parks and you can hire bikes with seats for the kids. Might be worth looking at an an alternative? X

We've been taking our twins regularly on very long haul holidays since they were 6 months old. Their first flight was a trip to Australia and took 30hrs plus with airport transfers etc. Just find a hotel with a good kids club and playground. If you find one with cheap babysitting you can leave her with a babysitter in the kids club if you want some time off. If you find a family friendly hotel you'll have a great time - read the trip advisor reviews on any hotels you are considering to make sure they have good kids clubs.

There are lovely places just 2-2.5 hrs with shorter transfers

Ooo where would you reccomend?

We did ask friends and family if they'd like to join us. The only ones interested are a childless couple who have no experience kids. I don't know them very well. DH thinks they'd babysit but TBH I would feel too anxious letting them take DD out of sight. I know DH would want to spend the evenings drinking with them once DD was in bed (fair enough- I don't drink because BF). But I'd end up doing all the early mornings. He does pull his weight entertaining her and playing, we just have different body clocks.

I haven't made up my mind either way. I'm tempted by sun, sand, sea and a break from routine. Just worried it will be horribly stressful and exhausting.

We went to Majorca when ds1 was 22 months and I was pregnant with ds2 and it was hellish. Ds1 ran every where, we didn't get to sit and eat or sit on the beach at all. He screamed blue murder if tried to stop him. The apartment didn't lock from the inside so he could open the door. The pool was a hazard so one of us had to helicopter him constantly. He ate biscuits the whole 2 weeks as he wouldn't touch any food. Never napped. Was up till midnight every night. It was 10 days of misery and 3k down the drain.

It depends entirely on your child. If they are content with toys and colouring books and stickers etc I'd consider it. But mine aren't.

Also a sahm I was more realistic than dh who only ever sees the dc with me present. He sat down and got his book out and id say ummm no, x needs watching. He huffed a bit because he wanted a break.

We only go on extremely child friendly hols now. And even then it's not a break, just the same shit but in a different location with less of the things you need to cope.

It doesn't sound like fun.

Dd at 22 months was very boisterous, always in the go and never napped. We just did self catering in the UK and it was reasonably chilled. I wouldn't go somewhere very hot as she's fair skinned.

My parents took me as a toddler to a large family friendly hotel on mainland Greece (Thessaloniki?) when I was 2 and DM was pregnant with my brother (1973).

I had a great time, lots of pics of me in the sun, pool etc. the only snag was I didn't like the food apart from Greek yogurt and honey and these little fried/oil pastry balls (honey), I apparently wouldn't eat anything else.

And also, my parents went downstairs for the evening in hotel and left me alone upstairs (Madeleine McCann?!) - apparently this was done back then and was normal. When they returned I was awake (but still there and ok) and crying. When mum told me about this when the MMcC story broke I jokily guilt tripped her over this!

2 1/2 hours flight you have mainland Spain, Majorca or Portugal which you would get lots of Family friendly resorts. Have a look at some of the First choice all inclusive holiday villages.

I've been on an all inclusive holiday with a child around that age plus a 3 year old.

It was fine. You can download CBeebies programmes from iPlayer for free so we did that plus had a couple of films.

We keep the children on uk time so they stayed up later for tea and slept a bit later in the morning.

It was lovely not having to cook or clean for a week.

The children spent pretty much every waking minute in the pool. Although we went back to our room for a couple of hours after lunch to keep out of the worst of the heat.

They were too young for the kids club but there was a disco by the pool everyday that lasted about 20 mins which they loved and there was also a children's disco every night were there was entertainment and a chance to have a glass of wine before bed which was also ace.

I didn't mind sharing a room with the children as it meant I went to sleep earlier and also felt a bit more rested.

Food was ok because the had a buffet so could always find something they liked.

Overall it was relaxing as it was nice to get a bit of heat and a change to the usual routine. It may not be as bad as you think.

I think a lot depends on how much you love the sun, for me almost everything is made more enjoyable by 30 degree heat and sunshine, even if it's going to the play park. Also how your dd is likely to adapt, plus of course how supportive your dp is.

Go for an apartment with all inclusive or with a good selection of restaurants nearby.

I would carry the buggy and the harness because it is usually pretty warm and young children get tired and don't want to walk far.

4 hours is a long time to have a wriggling toddler on your laps so I would look for somewhere with a shorter flight time.

Get a private transfer - they cost more but it is straight from the airport to your accommodation.

Look for accommodation with a children's pool/playground on site or nearby and possibly a beach/promenade for a safe place for your dd to run/play.

Most children's clubs in places where we have stayed, are for older children (3 & over) so check if there is age limits on the one at the resort.

Agree with pp, going on holidays with young children means it is mostly about the children and you can take turns with your DH to have time for yourselves while the other minds the dc and vice versa. Both parents need to pull their weight and someone needs to be looking after dc at all times. It is a very different holiday but can still be very enjoyable.

Don't forget to apply for her passport if you haven't already done it. It can take ages for them to come back.

You don't need stronger meds.

You need a dh who gets up at 5 am one day a week at least. And half the days when you away.
He cannot expect you to do all the early dealings in a hotel!
If UK weekends have been tip toeing around the dh to not wake him then forget that. It just isn't fair.
So he gets grumpy?
Tough. He has to grin and bear it.
Tell him you will go a week in the sun if he does the 5 am wakings for a weekend and then every Saturday to show he will do it when away.
Sorry but he has a child too.
He has to share waking up early .

So no don't go away with such a selfish person.
He needs to change his attitude if you ever going to have nice holidays away as a family.

We went to Menorca which is about 2.5 hrs and gorgeous and small. It's child friendly. You have to weigh up whether you would really be ok with DH leaving you with your child in the evenings to go drinking on holiday. A villa or a cottage in UK would surely mean you could have evenings together drinking or not.

Forgot to mention: if getting a private transfer, prebook suitable car seats.

There is very little room on family holidays(with young children) for giant piss ups imo. Your Husband needs to grow up. For your own sake - do not go on holiday with those friends especially if they are going for a piss up and don't have children with them . You will be stuck minding your DD alone and your Husband will be off getting locked every night and too hungover during the day to mind your DD.