To start deleting these wedding pics?

[JonSnowsWhore]

This is soooo outing but I don't know any other way of putting it.

5 weeks ago, I did the photography for an old friends wedding. I don't have a photography business but I did photography in college as an adult so she knows I do it cheaply to help out people I know. Before this wedding I hadn't seen her for a couple of years btw & wouldn't have been close enough to be invited to the wedding which is fine.

The wedding ended up being brought forward to when I'd still be pregnant, so I asked another photography keen friend of mine if she'd come & help me out as I knew I'd struggle doing a whole day at 7 months pregnant. Said we'd split the money between us & she said great as she'd love the experience.

So we get there at 10.30am, do the getting ready photos, horse & carriage photos, go to venue & do ceremony, group & couple photos, get a break for the food, then back again for the speeches, some of the party, cutting cake & first dance, eventually leave about 8.30pm. Bride said she'd pay me by bank transfer the next day & as I know her, I was fine with that.

Sent her my bank details the next day, got an excuse that their online banking was playing up, they'd go to a branch on the Monday to pay it. Monday morning I see on Facebook that they're setting off to their honeymoon in the uk. Don't hear anything. Midweek another message, there's no English banks so they'll do it as soon as they come back from honeymoon. I'm a bit pissed off now as it's not just me going without, I'm meant to give my other friend half. Since then it's been an excuse about their car breaking down, this money issue that money issue, can she pay me half & then the other half at the end of the month (now) so I say if that's all she can do then we'll have to do that, as I felt bad that my other friend hadn't been paid yet. She never paid the half, & never replied to my message. Now it's the end of the month, 5 weeks since the wedding & we still haven't had any money.

So, WIBU to start deleting her bloody wedding photos, what should I say to her as I'm getting bloody pissed off now, at first I didn't want to demand money as she was a 'friend' & didn't want to make things awkward, but can clearly see now that she doesn't give a shit about making things awkward!

It's not grabby to charge interest, it's what businesses do when they extend credit (which is, unwittingly, your situation). Is it grabby of banks to charge interest on mortgages?

I hate to say this but I think you've been had. She used you as back up in case the videographer didn't turn up etc...... and has no intention of paying. It's not a huge sum (you were far too cheap) and someone would lend her that for the photos.
I'd either be very bold and post a really good watermarked photo to her FB wall saying can't wait to send you the rest as soon as you pay me.......... and tag as many of her friends that you can?
Or give her a deadline of 28 days from the wedding day then delete!

Yeah but I'm not a business I was just doing her a favour, with a small charge to cover our time on the day. Oh it's gone past 28 days since the wedding! I love the posting to Facebook idea though. Find a nice big water mark so she can't do anything with the pic

Small claims court all the way. As long as you have copies of the messages where you agreed the terms you'll be fine and should win. Don't delete them just yet as if she coughs up you'll have to give them her

What an arsehole.
I would contact her asap, as it's pay day she might be In a position to pay, the longer you leave it the more likely she is to run out of money.m again.
I wouldn't delete just yet, I'd write her a letter reminding her of the money owed as politely as possible. Then if no money is deposited, then write again with a more formal letter (you can get letter templates online) explaining as professionally as possible all the costs incurred,all the time incurred and that if the bill is not paid by 31st may then the photos will be deleted.

She doesn't even have to talk or see you again, if she's worried about embarrassment, all she has to do is make the bank transfer.
Maybe suggest that you'll accept £100 now (so you can pay your friend) and then £100 by the 31st may.

She obviously used up all her money on the wedding and thought you were easy to fob off. What a knob!
Good luck with getting your money and Congrats on the baby!

Maybe send her a couple of carefully cherry picked photos that she will love but put a massive watermark across the whole image so she can't keep them? It might make her realise just how good they are.

Why don't you pay your friend who helped ,with the first half of the money she has given you? At least you won't feel bad that.

I like JaneEyre's idea

She had the chance to pay half & then half at the end of the month already though, it was her suggestion! Yet she never replied to me or paid that half, so tbh I think she should pay all of it now.

I just need to know how to word it when I message her, without too much of my annoyance coming through. Or maybe that's what she needs to hear!

Pringle she hasn't given me anything! I'd love to be able to pay her but I just don't have it spare she's so lovely she says she doesn't even want the money, she was just glad of the experience. But obviously as soon as I get it I'll 100% make sure she gets her half!

OK. It's a favour. It's a favour you aren't going to be paid for. Treat it like work that has a financial meaning for you if you want to be paid for this.

Just word it very professionally.

Please pay me £x by y date or I will lodge a claim with the small claims court.

You will easily get all your money back. I wouldn't delete the photos. Do you have emails/texts where she agrees to pay you etc?

Watermark the best picture with a big UNPAID and tag as many mutual friends as possible. And put a comment congratulation on your wedding, I'd appreciate if you could transfer the payment ASAP so I can send you your lovely pictures.

She is NO friend so dont be shy. 200 and that includes cost if travel for both of you, she's taking the piss. It is not even about the money now, it is having no respect for your intelligence and your time. Wear your big girl pants and put up a fight!

Does the bride know abut you needing to pay your friend? If not I would be explicit about that but don't say what proportion your helping friend is owed.

I think showing annoyance is ok as long as you are not rude.

I like Jane Eyre's idea too... Careful with FB though as she might just block you and you can't control her feed.

😂 love those suggestions cheep.

I bet it's really boring now & she says she's ever so sorry & pays up straight away. Good for me but boring for MN haha

Agree with treating it professionally. Don't delete the pictures (yet). Send her a firm but polit message stating that despite numerous requests you still have not received payment for attending and photographing the wedding on so and so date and to prevent disposal of the photographs please forward £ amount within the next 3 days.

Urghh it so bloody annoying, when someone burns you like that. It makes you feel like not doing anything for anyone again,doesn't it.
Personally speaking, I would weigh it up in mind. You have got a lot on your plate with the new baby coming along soon and want to concentrate on that. Is it worth it , to you, to get caught up in her tales of lies, excuses etc?
If it is the principle of the thing, then I would go along the small claims court route ( did you get anything in writing, text or email?). Do note delete the pics, but lock them somewhere away from your vision on your pc, so that it is not constantly reminding you and winding you up. Keep the messages to her factual, short and to the point.

Dont delete them, you need proof you done the work. Even though youre tempted. Send a message just sticking to the facts - you agreed to do her wedding photos for the sum of £200 and she owes you this now. If you dont recieve payment by a certain date you will be taking her to the small claims court.

Definitely don't delete them. She could twist this around to say that the photos were awful and you were hounding her for more money than she'd agreed to pay and - while she was being super nice about trying to sort out some kind of compromise - you just deleted them before she even got back from her honeymoon.

If you have the pictures you can prove this version of events wrong.

Sorry trying to keep up, not ignoring anyone. Yes she does know I need to pay my friend, this what I said in my last message, if she paid half I'd give it to my friend as it's not fair to make her wait even longer.

It's a shame, I like making people's pictures look as good as I can, but I've lost heart in doing that for her now & probably won't put my all into them, seeing as she's inconvenienced me for so long...

£200 is so so little for photos. It's a cliche but people really don't value what they don't pay (much) for.

Small Claims costs This gives you all the information you need - your claim falls into the cheapest bracket in every case. It would cost £25 to start the process, by filling in the form and submitting your claim.
Write to her via FaceBook since you don't have an alternative, headed Final Demand: It is now 5 weeks since I carried out the contract we agreed for your wedding photography and the sum of £200 is now 5 weeks overdue. Payment in full is required by (date end of next week), or I will be forced to recover this debt through the Small Claims procedure. Add your payment details (again!) Your full name and date.

And yes sorry a few people have asked, I do have all messages about agreed payment etc & her excuses still

Never do a job like this (weddings especially) without payment upfront.

Wedding photography without formal contracts and insurances really are a bad idea. Normally it's the bride who 'asked a photography friend' to undertake the wedding who would be the one posting upset that her £250 got her over exposed and blurry images or worse lost images that weren't backed up properly!

However, unfortunately, it's you that's suffered in this one as you've worked all day, driven a 2 hour round journey and you still owe your friend for the day!

Definitely do not edit them. I would politely email this...

Dear bride,

I am emailing in regards to the £xxx outstanding for the wedding photography I undertook for your wedding at [venue ] on 1.4.2017.

I understand that you have had mulitole financial difficulties since the wedding that has resulted in non payment owed to me.

As you are aware I agreed to do this for you, as a friend, and at a much lower rate than if you hired a professioal wedding photographer. Furthermore, I did this whilst being seven months pregnant which I knew would be physically demanding. I therefore asked another trusted photography friend to undertake the whole 10 hours with me to relieve some of those pressures; she is also waiting to be paid for the work she undertook for your wedding.

As a result of non payment despite multiple requests, and in view of my baby being due in a month, I would like to provide you with seven full days to make payment owed to me so that I can edit the images for you in a timely manner prior to enjoying my newborn baby.

I am currently out of pocket, both for the petrol with the two hour round trip I accounted for within the price quoted, along with the ££ I owe second tog for her to shoot the day too.

If I do not receive the owed funds within seven days I will have no alternative but to commence legal proceedings through a small claims court for the costs incurred to me.

Payment can be made..... xyz

Kind regards

Unpaid photographer