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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

DH has been sprayed with red dye!

767 replies

Mojit0 · 26/04/2017 17:00

This morning DH was running along the Thames towpath as he often does. He was running quite fast as he's training. There is an area where the path narrows a bit and he had caught up and was running behind a woman. He thought she moved to one side to let him pass, so he ran up behind her, at which point she screamed and suddenly sprayed him with a spray! Most of it got on his t-shirt but some of it also also got on his neck and lower face, though he didn't realise at the time. She screamed at him to get away from her and then ran back the other way. He was saying to her, "It's ok" etc, but he said she was so freaked out and looked so terrified he didn't try and follow her.
Now he has a zig-zag pattern of red up his neck and on the left side if his face and it really won't come off. He went into work and someone told him its probably a dye that the police use to mark criminals! I looked on google and it looks as if you can buy a red spray dye that won't wash off for 7 days! If it's this, it's a nightmare as he has to go to China on business tomorrow.
DH feels bad that she was so scared and her reaction actually scared him. He thinks maybe he should have held back, but he thought she was letting him overtake her. I think her reaction was a bit extreme though -AIBU? I run down that path frequently (although not at 6.30am) and I have never heard of anything like this.

OP posts:

Annahibiscuits · 26/04/2017 17:33

Give the woman a break. I can't believe some people are suggesting reporting HER or that she shouldn't go running, if she is scared

londonrach · 26/04/2017 17:35

Id report to police op

Blistory · 26/04/2017 17:35

She was obviously worried. She's running alone early in the morning which she's perfectly entitled to do. She then hears someone else approaching faster and presumably closer and closer to her given that the path narrows and he's speeded up.

I'd think it's a normal reaction that most women would have to experience fear or nervousness. How does she distinguish between your husband, the good guy, and the sick bugger who's chasing her to attack her.

It's not your husband's fault but neither is it hers. Could he call out in future if in that position ? Just a simple request to let him past might be sufficient to suggest he's a runner and not a potential attacker.

Indaba · 26/04/2017 17:35

Wonder if she had ear phones on and was surprised.
Used to live overseas and there was a spate of muggings on runners who wore both ear phones and thus were not aware of people in their surroundings.

Pinkheart5915 · 26/04/2017 17:36

Why shouldn't she be reported? She sprayed someone unnecessarily with the dye she didn't have to. How many others has she done this too for no reason?
Maybe she does have a reason to be scared of men we will never know but that mean it's ok to behave that way

LostMySanityCanIBorrowYours · 26/04/2017 17:37

Of course she should be allowed to run if she is frightened, however, if she is that frightened that she feels the need to assault a man for simply running past her, then she needs some support.

Calling the Police might get her that support or it might not. Not doing anything definitely won't help her.

She cannot just go around dying men red, no matter what she's been through. The next man she attacks in this way might just retaliate. For her own sanity and safety, she needs some support.

fruitbats · 26/04/2017 17:37

The police will be able to get the dye off? Really?
I think there is a good reason for calling the police i.e. in case she has reported it as an attack, but I wouldn't imagine they have a magic potion to remove the dye.

EweAreHere · 26/04/2017 17:37

I disagree, Blistory. This is entirely her fault. He was running along the Thames, as you do. The freaked out and sprayed him when he wasn't doing anything wrong. There might well be a psychological reason she did it, but it's still her fault.

He really does need to file a police report.

TragicallyUnbeyachted · 26/04/2017 17:37

Some people in England and Wales have been charged with assault for using Farb on other people (it's not illegal to carry, and it's legal to use in a genuinely and proportionately justifiable self defence context, but outside a genuinely and proportionately justifiable self defence context it may be assault and criminal damage). I feel for the poor woman who is obviously very afraid, but if she's on a hair trigger spraying other runners who try to pass her then she's a danger to the public.

Athome77 · 26/04/2017 17:38

I think I'd call the police and say I'd been sprayed by some crazy slow runner. if you look at it from the other side she's assaulted him....

IloveBanff · 26/04/2017 17:39

The woman may well have called the police about an attempted attack. You need to call them and report this.

Collaborate · 26/04/2017 17:39

It's not your husband's fault but neither is it hers.

I have just landed in a parallel universe where it is entirely proper for someone to think the worst of others and attack them lest they be attacked themselves, without a shred of reasonable belief that she was about to be attacked.

*searches for mute function so I don't have to read these utterly bonkers ideas.

SaucyJack · 26/04/2017 17:39

What on Earth is the point in it anyway?

If you're that scared of strangers, learn Muay Thai or carry a knife.

Stupid and unpleasant thing to do.

UppityHumpty · 26/04/2017 17:40

Is this along the Thames Path near Limehouse? If so there is a blonde woman who sprays people randomly with this shit - many male and female colleagues were attacked.

Blistory · 26/04/2017 17:40

Reported for what ? He seems to have gotten a bit too close which suggests a huge lack of awareness on his part.

Annahibiscuits · 26/04/2017 17:40

Men should give loan women a wider berth in these kind of situations. Some men do this just walking at night. Others cross the road. He was too close, if he was close enough to be sprayed. It's common around here to shout something to warn people you are approaching, like 'on your left'. Men do it in the swimming pool too, when doing lengths

londonrach · 26/04/2017 17:40

Im shocked at people saying not to report to the police. Image you running and a guy sprays you with red dye. It could have been acid. This needs reporting. Im shocked anyone does this.

ItsNachoCheese · 26/04/2017 17:40

Id report her for spraying your dh with an unknown substance. It could of seriously hurt him

DaisyQueen · 26/04/2017 17:42

Nail Polish remover should shift it. Wash immediately with water after though. I use it to remove hair dye stains

DartmoorDoughnut · 26/04/2017 17:43

Your poor DH! Hope you find something that gets the dye off

IshipTomHardysohard · 26/04/2017 17:43

Op I would call the non emergency number and report the women.

What she did was way out of line, scared or not

Hope you manage to get the red off your dh before tomorrow.

honeysucklejasmine · 26/04/2017 17:43

Uppity bloody hell, that's a weird thing to do.

OP if all else fails, get some camouflagemake up.

LostMySanityCanIBorrowYours · 26/04/2017 17:44

He was too close, if he was close enough to be sprayed.

The spray has a reach of over thirty feet. How much of a wide berth should he have given her?

Men have a right to be out in public, believe it or not. Of course innocent men do not need to cross the street to avoid women in case they get a fright. FFS.

PaintingOwls · 26/04/2017 17:44

I'm shocked at the amount of victim-blaming on this thread. The woman is scared for her safety so, what, she should not leave the house? Perhaps she can't run at other times due to work or family commitments. Do you realise what you sound like when you say she shouldn't live her life if she fears for her safety? I have been assaulted by a jogger at 5pm on a sunny summer day in a park close to where I live, so I don't think him being a jogger automatically renders him harmless.

She didn't know and she clearly panicked.

Your DP should absolutely report it to the police, what if there is a call out for a local man with red dye on his face? He needs to set the record straight, at least.

Lucked · 26/04/2017 17:44

It may be legal to carry it, and none of the chemicals may be banned but is it legal to use it and stain someone and their clothes? Running gear can be really expensive.

I would let the police know, just for some advice.

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