to not stop my DC doing things because other people don't want their DC to do them?

[hollyvsivy]

My children are adventurous and unless something is dangerous or unsafe for themselves or others, I don't see the problem. Increasingly I find myself being scowled at by other parents whose DC want to copy mine as if I should stop mine to help them out. I've had passive agressive comments, too. As far as I'm concerned, it's up to them to enforce their rules on their children - not me.

Some examples to give you an idea of the contexts of these situations:

Splashing in puddles
Climbing trees
Standing up on the swing
Climbing the slide (as long as no one else is waiting to go down)
Painting their hands and feet at toddler group
Rolling down hills

AIBU to continue to let my children do what I'm fine with them doing and ignore disapproving outsiders who expect me to stop them so their children won't do the same?

Climbing up slides, standing on swings is fine if they are yours. Doing so in a playground is misusing the equipment.

What an odd thread. If I don't want my dc to do something other kids are doing, I just say no. I don't go around glaring furiously at the other parents. Don't know anyone else who does either. Think you may be exaggerating slightly OP.

(And if what Kerala says is true about walking your dd to secondary school, please don't. That's a surefire way to make her the laughing stock of the school among her peers. She has to grow up and away from you sometime, and secondary school is the perfect way for her to start taking those independence steps.)

Playgrounds are for learning to take turns and be considerate, but they are also for using your imagination and growing in freedom and independence. [Claraschu]

Yes indeed.

I think the trouble with climbing a slide is that if the playground is full and several children are waiting for a turn on the slide, the climber is going to hold the children up for longer than anyone sliding down - it takes longer to climb up than to slide down. Perhaps some parents do not see the four or five children waiting, or maybe some don't understand that part of the fun of the slide is the sheer speed of going down, running around, climbing up the ladder and then sliding again? A longer than normal wait for the slide interrupts the momentum.

My Dsis lives in a completely urban area where there is one playground serving a wide area that includes both public housing and a major shopping/museum area. There were many local children who used the playground daily and there were fairly straightforward unwritten rules about using the equipment that regular users always observed. Problems arose when blow-ins with their offspring failed to notice lines growing for the swings or the slides and hogged equipment for far longer than the locals were prepared to countenance. Dsis often jogged things along and maybe even prevented a riot occasionally by informing oblivious parents that the rule was only a few minutes on the swings for each child, and no hogging the slides either. Quick turnaround was key.

I don't understand the glaring either.

We taught our kids to risk assess. My mum was really anxious about me letting them jump out of the trees into the deep part of the river. But hey knew that before they did it, they had to swim down and check the riverbed for debris. They also weren't allowed to do it when the river was fast flowing. Plus, when they were smaller, we did it with them.

They've always climbed trees in the woods, but they know to check for dead branches. I discourage climbing trees in parks because it's busier and if everyone did it, the trees would get damaged.

We occasionally had other parents saying no when we would've said yes. I tended to tell mine to stick to something they could all do together in those cases.

So are people saying that if there's a massive queue for the swings it's unreasonable to ask a child to get off after a reasonable turn?

Ooops

zzzzz Fri 28-Apr-17 07:07:58
"DO "locals" take precedence over "blow-ins" (shock**@terminology**) ?

Surely public playgrounds are for "the public" not "the public who live nearby". I'm aghast that your ds is feels free to marshal children she has no connection with to a set of rules she created and enforces shock. It's quite outrageous behaviour really."

This reminds me that I probably averted a riot last year.

Group of approx 8yo kids living next to the communal playground had decided that this was their playground and the slightly older kids from down the road had no right to it. By the time I passed them on my way from the bus stop they had picked up heavy tree branches to defend "their" playground, one boy had already been whacked over the head and the older kids were beginning to look around for their own defensive weapons. No adults in sight, blood bath clearly imminent. I felt very glad that years of lecturing have taught me to project my voice.

I just love how this OP has started ANOTHER thread, this time about her kid being academically advanced. Finish the threads you start please OP!

It's easy to see why some kids are entitled brats who hog equipment, and don't shift off the bottom of slides when there's a kid or two up at the top unable to slide down because they're in the way going by this thread.
It's because their parents see it as stifling their creativity to have to slide down slides, and they should be played on however they want.
So the oblivious parents half the time aren't oblivious - they know but just don't give a shit that they're impacting others.
Niiiice. Kids don't really get a chance to be able to learn how to take turns and play nicely with attitudes like that, do they.
I hope the ones who let their kids climb up don't start crying when their little ones gets a smack in the face by a boot by someone coming down the slide.
I've seen it happen all too often - someone starts sliding down, and then someone who thinks slides are climbing frames comes out of nowhere and starts climbing up. Ends up getting hit.

"is that because climbing slides IS a gateway to anarchy?"

No. Could be reinforcing a message that your wants take precedence over other people's though. I'd rather my children were considerate and thoughtful. Maybe, to use a Mumsnet staple, "that's just me"?

But you are advocating your child's wants (i.e. Going down) take precedence over the ones who want to go up.

Oh, FFS, is this for real??!!
It's a SLIDE!!!! What part of that is so hard to grasp?!
I swear, this place is bloody crackers or on the wind up lately.

No. Could be reinforcing a message that your wants take precedence over other people's though. I'd rather my children were considerate and thoughtful. Maybe, to use a Mumsnet staple, "that's just me"?

Nope, not just you. It's nice to know that there are actually some parents out there who aren't entitled, and it's not just all the "crunchy" type.

Is this a wind up? I'm sure I've seen the climbing up the slide and being all free with play etc before? Deja Vu!!

Op Veet would work a treat or laser treatment if you have the money.

"But you are advocating your child's wants (i.e. Going down) take precedence over the ones who want to go up."

Yes I am. I also advocate for a child who wants to paddle in the paddling pool rather than fill it with sand, make sand castles and have them left standing rather than having them stomped on, and swing on the swings as they are rather than throw the seats over the bar to make the chains really really short. Also for the child who wants to sit and listen to the story rather than play the musical instruments put out for later. Oh, and the child who wants to feed the birds, fish or whatever rather than have them scattered.