to not stop my DC doing things because other people don't want their DC to do them?

[hollyvsivy]

My children are adventurous and unless something is dangerous or unsafe for themselves or others, I don't see the problem. Increasingly I find myself being scowled at by other parents whose DC want to copy mine as if I should stop mine to help them out. I've had passive agressive comments, too. As far as I'm concerned, it's up to them to enforce their rules on their children - not me.

Some examples to give you an idea of the contexts of these situations:

Splashing in puddles
Climbing trees
Standing up on the swing
Climbing the slide (as long as no one else is waiting to go down)
Painting their hands and feet at toddler group
Rolling down hills

AIBU to continue to let my children do what I'm fine with them doing and ignore disapproving outsiders who expect me to stop them so their children won't do the same?

Personally I would put slide climbing in room 101.

if you rub a sole across a hardwood floor to leave traces, a tea towel pushed across it won't do much. Why don't you examine the slide next time, put your hand on it and feel the smoothness and then see how the soles / mud less slippy.
Experiment, explore. Never too late!

OP you sound like the type of parent who thinks the odd punch between kids is OK because " boys will be boys".

Slide climbing gives me the rage. The amount of parents who DO let their kids climb it when mine are trying to go down is unbelievable. Whether initially when they started climbing there wasn't anyone there, doesn't mean there won't be when they're half way up/near the top.

I love all the assumptions about what else I'm fine with, hilarious

Odd op that you so keen to demonstrate how "adventurous" your kids are yet on another thread your 10 year old is not allowed out of your sight and you plan to walk her to secondary school? Seems contradictory to me.

Standing on the swing and walking up the slide pisses me off tbh because it usually gets them all muddy and then ruins it for the other kids who then can't slide down/sit on it.

Lindy2 Hear hear!!

Many other children do zzz so if they saw yours climbing it's only natural to copy.
Even apparently non sticky shoes leave traces of dirt /grit etc.

zzzzz great post

What is all this hysteria about mud for anyway? Most people don't have actively muddy shoes, unless it's raining.

Lots of people don't rake off their shoes inside - are their houses full of this mid we speak of????

If you are so concerned about your child getting some mud on their clothes I suggest you dress them more appropriately for he park.

Children's creativity is one of their best qualities, it would be nice if it wasn't totally quashed "no don't play that way".

"Children's creativity is one of their best qualities, it would be nice if it wasn't totally quashed "no don't play that way""

Nothing wrong with "No, don't play that way, you're stopping other children playing at all"

Speaking as a Scandinavian (call the devil...), I see absolutely no conflict between "having a certain amount of freedom and independence" and "understanding and adhering to local social conventions regarding public equipment and public spaces".

When I am in the UK, I queue for the bus: I don't just elbow my way on because that's what they do across the Channel. When my dc used slides in the UK, they were not allowed to climb up them, because that was not the generally accepted convention.

It has had absolutely no effect on their general ability to climb trees, cook supper or deal with minor accidents. In fact, I'd go as far as saying that adhering to social conventions was part of the general independence I wanted to encourage, part of what I hoped would enable them to deal with life without a parent constantly on hand to negotiate.

Cory, you don't mean you stifled your creativity by using the queue in a conventional manner, do you? You poor, poor thing..........

I get what you're saying OP. I've been in the park before with my DC and had other parents helpfully point out things that my DC are doing (normally climbing on the slide's roof) to me, obviously meaning for me to stop them, and in fact one of my friends did actually ask me to ask them to stop it as her DC now wanted to do it too.
I don't see why I should stop my DC doing things that I'm comfortable with just because other parents don't want to say no to their own children. You parent yours and I'll parent mine.

I don't agree with letting children chase birds, I cannot imagine asking another parent to stop their child doing it though, I just make it clear to my children that I think it's cruel and under no circumstances should they do it. And no, not in a loud overparenting voice

It's not creative to climb up a slide or the slide roof. Just bloody annoying.

Considering the amount of dog shit on pavements and in play parks here, a bit of mud on a slide is hardly worth worrying about.

Children unable to play on grass in a park because of the dog shit (or uncontrolled dogs off leads) is something I find far more annoying than 7 year olds having to learn to negotiate with one another about how to share equipment.

OP I got a load of shit because I said I let my DS climb up a slide. I think you're fine but what do I know.

Odd op that you so keen to demonstrate how "adventurous" your kids are yet on another thread your 10 year old is not allowed out of your sight and you plan to walk her to secondary school? Seems contradictory to me.

^ This

... but I'm finding the contradictory nature of OP quite interesting. OP seems puzzled as to whether she is a free spirit rebel parent, who cares not that your child might get mud on their trousers, or a (slightly judgy pants) over-protective parent. We know that one of her DC's is 10 years old. I have a picture of her with a couple of preteens / young teens, indulging them with a splash in a puddle after she's walked them home from school; assiduously avoiding the "caked in make up" 10 year olds loitering outside Maccy D's with their i-phones! It's very entertaining. Well done OP!

Isn't it ultimately less about letting your children be 'free' and more teaching them to be considerate and modify their behaviour to suit the situation they are in?

For example, we have a treehouse and a big slide in our garden at home. My kids climb up the slide, slide down on their tummies, sit for ages eating crisps at the top etc etc. At home this is fine as they are with their siblings and know how to share and will ask each other to move/take turns if needs be. If we go to the park they know that this behaviour is absolutely not appropriate as there are other people to consider and the equipment is not theirs so needs to be used respectfully. They know the difference because we have taught them how to behave. They also have an awareness of the fact that how you behave at home is different to how you behave when you are out.

I've been here I was letting my son touch the water of a fountain letting him explore and another woman's child opposite side of us tried the same and gave me a filthy look. I think she was just pissed off she had to deal with her child as she didn't want him getting wet. As long as it's not inconsiderate to others I have no problem with my son exploring. I recently got told off by OH because son barely fell over and I thought it was funny apparently a dad was giving me the evils. few minutes later his child bopped her head no reaction he come flying over oh no let's find mummy to kiss it better que sobbing child lol

You can take adventurous too far though - my toddler fell in a river once and I had to jump in and get her and lost my shoes in the process. That was fun.

Is it your nearly 10 year old that's climbing the slide? That may explain the looks you've been getting.