to not stop my DC doing things because other people don't want their DC to do them?

[hollyvsivy]

My children are adventurous and unless something is dangerous or unsafe for themselves or others, I don't see the problem. Increasingly I find myself being scowled at by other parents whose DC want to copy mine as if I should stop mine to help them out. I've had passive agressive comments, too. As far as I'm concerned, it's up to them to enforce their rules on their children - not me.

Some examples to give you an idea of the contexts of these situations:

Splashing in puddles
Climbing trees
Standing up on the swing
Climbing the slide (as long as no one else is waiting to go down)
Painting their hands and feet at toddler group
Rolling down hills

AIBU to continue to let my children do what I'm fine with them doing and ignore disapproving outsiders who expect me to stop them so their children won't do the same?

The main thing is whether your choices take away choices from a larger group of individuals. If they do, then you are being selfish and unreasonable.

This will depend on the circumstances of each occasion obviously.

Just have a look at the setup and make a decision. Teach your children to do the same. At that point, you can retire to coffee, cake and mumsnet!

We are starting to go round in circles.

Well I think if you asked most people the purpose of a slide they would tell you it's to climb up the ladder and slide down to the bottom? So to me that's how it should be used in a public playground. I don't agree that asking a child to abide by certain rules 'stops them thinking for themselves' at all, life is full of rules! Like I say in your own environment where you are not affecting anyone else then it's your rules, in a public park I think children should be taught to respect the play equipment. My child is two and has tried to climb the slide before, I've just picked him up and explained that we don't climb the slide that way, and he moved on to play on something else, it hasn't at all ruined his games or imagination!

Nipper that link is interesting. I find it hard to explain my very strong feelings about slide climbing because I'm generally pretty laid back and get quite irritated when people blindly go on about 'But those are the RULES!' Even when a rule is obviously stupid and should be changed.

It's strange isn't it because itsmime has a point snd we all know those parents however in the 70s no parent supervised playgrounds and we managed to organise ourselves.

No one would dare play up at school mind you too bloody scared of being slapped. Another debate

"It's strange isn't it because itsmime has a point snd we all know those parents however in the 70s no parent supervised playgrounds and we managed to organise ourselves"

Not sure you did, actually. Lots of broken bones. Lots of bullying. Lots of fights. And lots of quieter, more reserved children not getting a go unless they had an assertive older sibling to stand up for them.

It's strange isn't it because itsmime has a point snd we all know those parents however in the 70s no parent supervised playgrounds and we managed to organise ourselves"

I do not remember going to the park as a young child only once I got older. Maybe the difference is that children get to go to the park younger these days.

Bertrand lots of broken bones and bullying still around don't kid yourself. Don't think it's any different except bullying now is easier via internet.

Baroness I starred school in 1969 and no one had parents meet them sfter thr initial first days. We all went to the playground and mucked in together. Siblings looked out for each other and older kids did help the younger ones.

Maybe you had posh parents who had a car?

Don't get me wrong defiantly not saying it was better then,it wasn't in lots of ways? but the tendency for helicoptering and micromanaging kids play now is harmful.

Don't get me wrong defiantly not saying it was better then,it wasn't in lots of ways? but the tendency for helicoptering and micromanaging kids play now is harmful.

Climbing up slides and standing on swings are only allowed at home unless they are the only children in the park which happens quite a lot at village parks.

Chasing Pigeons? My girls don't exactly chase but they do shout out Pigeons and try to get near them, it never entered my head that it might be cruel they do it to Ducks and Chickens too! Oh dear.

I think my children are how children should be, they want to explore, talk to everyone, touch everything and have fun and they are certainly not scared of their own shadows. Some people would describe them as an handful I describe them as normal!

Batgirlspants my mum only passed her test the year before I did. School was over a mile away and a group of us were walked too and from school together while at primary with the mums taking it in turn to accompany us. I don't think in either house we lived in that there was a play area anywhere near.

Good link nipper

I'm sorry my children didn't have the childhood I had. We spent a lot of time on bikes, building bale dens and swimming in a river. And of course 'helping' adults on the farm. Parks are quite boring and maybe the 'spirited' children are reacting to that. Who knows. But the climbing up the slide thing is raising my blood pressure just thinking about it. I have spent a good amount of my life on school playgrounds. There are always some children who push it too far and have to be told 'Stop!'

Barbie slides don't go round in circles, that's what roundabouts do. I've never seen a disobedient, undisciplined child turn a slide round in circles; clearly the ones who climb up the slide aren't any worse than the ones who slide down it.

How very unimaginative, not to spin a slide! Eeeh, I don't know, insert exclamation of your choice here...

In my community it's split 50/50 between slide climbers and slide sliders. I know all the children well. The slide climbers are just as considerate and polite as the slide sliders. The problematic children are the ones that park for 20 minutes on the slide (be it top/middle/bottom) and block everyone else's access up or down

Oh gosh, no Miaowthecat I certainly did not intend to stereotype or judge at all! I'm literally recounting my actual experiences. Not saying all parents of girls are like that at all (just like not all boys are loud, like mine!) but this really did happen, several times or more!

I'm interested that you feel MN is in favour of boys. I'd never noticed but will be on the alert now

Someone's going to demand next that a roundabout should only go clockwise. And the kids pushing it anti clockwise are feral

'The slippery slope from slide climbing child to slide pooing teen...'

Clearly slide climbing is a gateway activity who knows what it could lead too

I have the same here, my boys are like bouncy puppies, always ready for adventure. But I generally stop them if parent friends are trying to get their child to follow different rules. I just say "stay away from that net for a minute because X isn't allowed on it". My 5 yr old understands this. When we are alone or around strangers I generally let them loose unless other children are getting upset. Maybe I ABU but I never thought of it before. X