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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Airlines, seats, passive aggression

311 replies

RebeccaWithTheGoodHair · 24/04/2017 14:12

I was on a long haul flight over the weekend, 2 lots of 7 hour flights with a 3 hour stopover in the middle - it was never going to be a pleasant journey.

The first bit was OK but on the 2nd flight the people in the row in front sat down and immediately put their chairs back. Not just a little tilt either. They were practically in our laps. Our dropdown trays were hardly usable and the screen was difficult to see.

Of course they were perfectly entitled to do it and I could have done the same. Except I didn't because it's so bloody horrible for the person behind.

I don't get why airlines put these type of seats in, even using the tilt doesn't make them relaxing in any way. All it does it make it slightly less uncomfortable for the person in that seat - but 100 times worse for the hapless person behind.

My AIBU is whether giving it an extra hard shove when trying to use my tray or pick up my bag is U or not?

And if you are someone who does drop your seat back like that then don't you realise how horrible it is for the person behind you?

OP posts:
HighwayDragon1 · 24/04/2017 20:55

Why can't people turn around "Excuse me, would you mind if I mean my seat back I'm tired/uncomfortable/whatever?" Whats wrong with a bit of common courtesy?

Hulababy · 24/04/2017 20:55

And yes you can say for an under 2 to have their own seat.
However whenever the seat belt sign is on - take off and landing plus any other tome on the flight the pilot turns the sign on (turbulence being the main time) the infant must be on the parent's knee.

Roussette · 24/04/2017 21:00

But what happens if their seat is reclined and they say "no, please don't recline your seat". I can imagine that happening. You're stuck upright for the whole flight then!

CosmoKlit · 24/04/2017 21:11

"However whenever the seat belt sign is on - take off and landing plus any other tome on the flight the pilot turns the sign on (turbulence being the main time) the infant must be on the parent's knee."

No, they can stay strapped into their carseat usually during all these scenarios.

Passthecake30 · 24/04/2017 21:21

I am 6ft with 36" legs... so if I'm on a long flight I tend to ask the person in front to give me warning before they recline... otherwise it hurts. That tends to mean that they don't recline fully, people are generally nice Smile

CosmoKlit · 24/04/2017 21:23

Pass Do you ask for a seat with extra legroom? My ex used to (6ft4) and it was never a problem for him to have one.

MrsPeelyWaly · 24/04/2017 21:25

It was a little over 2 hr flight in the middle of the day so no need to go to sleep

How in the name of God would you know who needs to sleep or not?

If your husband has long legs buy a seat that fits him.

Passthecake30 · 24/04/2017 21:27

Not since I've had children as I'd have to sit separate to them. I would consider it in the future I guess.

I was offered once, and then dp got told he would have to sit behind as he's shorter😀

CosmoKlit · 24/04/2017 21:32

Pass Ah I did wonder if you had kids and that was the reason why. My ex found the best seats with kids were where the plane narrows at the back (sometimes), instead of a three row on the outside, it's a two, with space for legs to go as well.

Pentapus · 24/04/2017 21:35

immediately put their chairs back. Not just a little tilt either. They were practically in our laps.

Which fabulous airline offers such relaxing seat tiltage? All the planes I've been on have seats that tilt to about the same degree as the head of a skeptical Mner.

wasonthelist · 24/04/2017 21:58

Grin Pentapus

wasonthelist · 24/04/2017 22:00

The 2 comparison sites I used before gave information based on the top of the seats.

So if everyone reclines, the pitch hasn't changed at all.

wasonthelist · 24/04/2017 22:04

Pass Do you ask for a seat with extra legroom? My ex used to (6ft4) and it was never a problem for him to have one.

You have to pay for these on almost all airlines now. Even before that I used to ask and despite being obviously tall was often denied only to find on boarding that shorter folk had the exit row seats (not complaining - just saying - that is all long in the past anyway now and paying works better for me as I get more chance of getting one).

SoulAccount · 24/04/2017 22:20

Ryanair don't fly long haul.

As long as it isn't during meals, I don't find it a problem that anyone reclines their seat.

I am 5'7", and find it bloody uncomfortable to sleep bolt upright on an 11 hour overnight flight. I know this because I couldn't get my seat to go back on the last 11 hour flight I did. If as we landed I had discovered that the person behind had interfered with my seat I would be highly likely to punch them. 11 hours of my discomfort squashed into one second!

You can still use the table, still see the screen, when the seat is tipped back. It's designed that way.

I don't know where this notion that 'everyone' knows it is selfish has come from!

wasonthelist · 24/04/2017 22:46

I don't know where this notion that 'everyone' knows it is selfish has come from!
Nor me - it's batshit!

expatinscotland · 24/04/2017 22:53

I recline and fall asleep on short-haul flights 'in the middle of day'. Usually because I've been up all night on a long haul and been on the go for oh, 15-20 hours or so, and having come from a 6 hour time difference. No, I don't ask permission.

BlondeBecky1983 · 24/04/2017 23:01

I got a sharp smack on the nose on a recent long haul flight when then woman in front pushed her seat abruptly back when I, unfortunately, was rummaging for my inflight magazine! ConfusedSmile

BlondeBecky1983 · 24/04/2017 23:02

BTW, I don't mind people reclining, but a little warning or a quick look might be necessary sometimes!

NewYearNewLife53 · 24/04/2017 23:08

Navy:

IF we all want to be comfortable on long haul or even short haul flights, then we need airlines to design better seats, improve legroom, perhaps have quite compartments, a creche compartment.... Except it would cost so much, half of us would never go away again.

Or - airlines could just choose not to make such huge profits

blackteasplease · 24/04/2017 23:11

I think reclining is OK where available provided that -

  1. the person does just mention that they are going to recline beforehand, to let the other person know not to lean forward at that moment etc.
  1. the same rules apply to everyone - i.e. no special "oh I'm tall you can't recline if you are in front of me, but I will recline my seat".
Coastalcommand · 24/04/2017 23:52

I'm with you OP. I never recline my seat either. I wish the Sears had that function removed.

Coastalcommand · 24/04/2017 23:52

Seats not Sears.

bumblingbovine49 · 25/04/2017 00:08

When I used to regularly fly to And from NY for work (once a month for about a year) i always reclined my seat immediately after food was served and tried to sleep as much as I could. I definitely cannot sleep upright in the same way.

On the flights out it was less of an issue. i flew straight from work on an evening flight but the time difference meant I arrived in the evening and got a night I of sleep before working when co.I have home I also got the evening flight travelling to the airport after a full day at work in NY.

On landing at about 7am local time after a 5hr flight, I was expected to get a cab to the office in London and do a full day of work so you can be sure that I did my best to get as much sleep as I could on the flight long haul or not.

KittyWindbag · 25/04/2017 01:16

This topic is always split fairly evenly but here's my opinion.

I fly long haul at least twice a year. I'm talking about 12 hour flights. It is really unreasonable of people to fully recline their seats in economy because it really does very little to help the person in that seat get a sleep, and is of huge detriment to the person sitting behind.

Really the fault is with airlines for packing them in so tightly.

On a flight of five or so hours or less, I think it's less of an issue. But 12 hours jammed in behind someone fully reclined is unbearable.

melj1213 · 25/04/2017 01:42

It was a little over 2 hr flight in the middle of the day so no need to go to sleep

Says who? Just because it's lunchtime doesn't mean that people haven't had other travelling to do before this flight. I regularly fly short haul to Madrid to visit friends but mostly for work but when I get my flight at 4pm on a Wednesday afternoon from Liverpool, I have already done 4 hours of travelling to get from my town in the middle of nowhere in the Lake District to the airport via public transport (as it's far cheaper than driving & parking at the airport, esp if booked in advance) ... then when I get to Madrid I have to get to where I'm staying and prepare for an intense couple of weeks of work starting first thing. So when I get on the plane, I get settled in my window seat, put my water bottle in the seat pocket, put on my neck pillow, plug in my headphones to my relaxation tracks and as soon as the safety demo is done I turn the music on and when we've taken off I recline my seat a little bit and sleep for as much of the 2 1/2 flight as possible.

I also hate flying because airline seats are so narrow that sitting bolt upright gets very uncomfortable for me as I am tall and broad thanks for those genes dad (and admittedly being on the larger side doesn't help either) so if I'm flying short haul I prefer to spend as much of it asleep as possible not only to be refreshed at my destination but because if I'm asleep I don't notice that my knees hurt at being jammed into the seat in front, or my hip hurts from the angle the windowside armrest digs in or that I'm squashed or who does or doesn't have their seat reclined or anything else that annoys people a few miles up in the air.

I like to think I am an ideal seatmate - I try to board early, stow my bag in the locker, get in my window seat, and stay there dozing for the entire flight, then at the other end I am more than happy to let other people fight it out to be first off the plane, but being in the window seat I am not stopping anyone from getting up sooner than I am ready to either. If someone was judging the fact that in all of that I reclined the seat an inch or two so that I could be comfortable in my quiet bubble then they need to consider who is really the bad traveller in that scenario?