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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be a little annoyed at friend.

16 replies

Lonelymummyof1 · 20/04/2017 21:50

Daughter 3 goes to ballet bit of background she has a life limited condition and the ballet school are very very accomadating.
We come from a pretty middle class area and ballet fees are steep.
Payment was due on the first day of term unfortuntly a week before payday and due to a few hospital admissions I had been left short.
My friend emailed her ballet school to imform them of this and to explain I did not have enough money to pay !
Left me feeling very very akward as I would never have asked to let her off a lesson and of course they were very kind and said it was not a problem.
I just felt it was a lil odd for her to do that ?

OP posts:
leighdinglady · 20/04/2017 21:56

I think it was kind of her. She was trying to help. She meant well.

228agreenend · 20/04/2017 22:01

maybe she thought the email would be kept confidential and she didn't want them to hassle you regarding late payment, due to the hospital visits.

Otherwise it's a little bit interfering.

leighdinglady · 20/04/2017 22:11

No harm done really. Maybe just thank her for trying to help, but explain it's made you feel awkward and then pay for the lesson.

My niece has life limiting illness and although she's too unwell to do any activities, I probably would have done exactly the same, or paid for it myself. Sometimes when there's something so upsetting like a life limiting illness in your family (or friends) you look for any way you can to help.

ChaiTeaTaiChi · 20/04/2017 22:13

I wouldn't be happy about anyone passing on my financial issues, or intefering with my business. Bloody rude.

StillDrivingMeBonkers · 20/04/2017 22:15

Well, what would you prefer? A friend that tries to make your life easier - or some snotty cow in a tutu demanding money when you don't have it?

Nocabbageinmyeye · 20/04/2017 22:16

I would not be impressed! Since when does over stepping the mark and handing out other peoples information count as helpful? Its weird, intrusive and I would be raging, after I got my head around the weirdness, who does that? Confused

Piratesandpants · 20/04/2017 22:17

Snotty cow in a tutu Grin

Lonelymummyof1 · 20/04/2017 22:20

I know she meant well I just found it a bit weird.
Her teacher is also not snotty or wear a tutu haha.
They are actually very lovely I just would of preffered to approach them myself.
Maybe I am being unreasonable just felt a little taken back by it.

OP posts:
mickeysminnie · 20/04/2017 22:20

I would be very cross if a 'friend' spread my private business around! How dare she!

Armadillostoes · 20/04/2017 22:25

YANBU OP. I am surprised that so many people think that having a friend interfere in this way is acceptable. I wouldn't be comfortable if someone disclosed my financial affairs to a third party without my consent, even if it was meant kindly. It does sound like a very clumsy effort to help though, rather than a deliberate attempt to be nasty.

ChaiTeaTaiChi · 20/04/2017 22:37

snotty cow in a tutu demanding money when you don't have it?

you mean a professional person providing a service and expecting payment for doing so? Hmm

Darbs76 · 20/04/2017 22:40

I wouldn't be angry she was trying to help you. Maybe she should have asked but sounds like she's got your back. It's not worth falling out over is it?

Sugarpiehoneyeye · 20/04/2017 22:45

You've got a good friend there OP, she's completely got you'd back🙄

Silverdream · 20/04/2017 23:11

I'd be a bit taken aback and unhappy about it. Equally your friend was probably trying to help but didn't get it quite right. Was a bit over zealous I wouldn't be surprised if she's now questioning herself whether that was a good thing to do.

emmyrose2000 · 21/04/2017 03:55

Completely inappropriate and disrespectful of the so-called "friend". I'd be angry and mortified if someone discussed my finances (good or bad) with a third party.

But how did 'friend' know about your difficulties? Did you discuss it with her initially? If so, now you know not to trust her with her any personal info. I never discuss my finances with friends.

If I wasn't able to pay one of my bills, I'd rather the creditor just approached me directly about it if I hadn't yet spoken to them myself.

Piratesandpants · 21/04/2017 07:49

Probably just a well intentioned faux pas on the part of your friend. Just keep in mind that she meant well.

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