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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To go swimming without shaving?

425 replies

ArriettyMatilda · 18/04/2017 21:10

I am not a regular shaver. It's time consuming, occasionally itchy during regrowth and I hate myself for feeling like I have to conform to society's expectations plus I'm lazy I really want to take dd swimming more regularly but I really can't be bothered with maintaining a smooth bikini line and legs.

I am well aware that I wouldn't even be asking this if I was a man, but I can't shake the feeling that someone will be disgusted by my hair. I'm so annoyed that I feel like I have to remove part of my body to become an acceptable member of society.

Would you judge me for having hairy legs and hair around my bikini line? If you don't like shaving what do you wear swimming?

OP posts:
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LauraMipsum · 18/04/2017 22:56

I've never seen anyone try to teach a children's class, other than a swimming class, in a swimming costume.

My general rule is that if something is acceptable for a man it's acceptable for a woman. So if I'm at work where a man would be expected to wear a sleeved shirt, so will I, but if I'm out in summer where a man can wear a sleeveless top with hair under his arms showing, so can I. If I'm at a swimming pool where a man can wear swim trunks where (if i looked, which I don't) I could probably find a few strays poking out of his shorts, then I'm ok in a swimsuit too.

It's just context. I don't wander round with an escaping tarantula at a funeral parlour.

CartwheelGirl · 18/04/2017 22:56

Boyleg swimsuit is what you need. I swim 2-3 times a week and shave about once a month so I'm not always smooth when I go swimming. I think as long as it's not ridiculous length it's ok. My opinion, obviously.

LockedOutOfMN · 18/04/2017 22:57

You're fine, OP, enjoy your swim, and your body!

peaceloveandbiscuits · 18/04/2017 22:59

Nothercupoftea has the wrong end of the stick I think hope. We're not talking about cheesewire bikinis here, just regular swimming costumes. Therefore no need to see any "crotch" (by which I presume you mean vulva). So we are talking about thighs, actually.

But regardless, hair does not equal unhygienic.

rosy71 · 18/04/2017 23:07

I have a swimming costume with shorts. No need to worry then.

Willow2017 · 18/04/2017 23:13

If you have no basic hygiene and/or expose your pubic hair to the world, you have no self respect I am afraid. Some things are supposed to stay private

Who the hell notices other peoples nether regions in a pool?

People have hair all over their bodies, really they do, some you can see some its harder to see but its a fact none the less.
Get over it.

I would do a quick whizz round with the razor the night before if I was going swimming next day but if it was a spontaneous thing I wouldnt care. And I certainly couldnt give a shiney one if anyone else had shaved anywhere on their body or not. Their body their choice, nobody gets to tell you what to do with it. Certainly not some random on the internet!

Jeeze imagine a thread about a woman being told she was selfish, 'disrespectful' and 'unhygenic' because she didnt shave her pubic area by her boyfriend? I can see the responses now Grin

My head must be terribly unhygenic its positively covered in hair!

bear28 · 18/04/2017 23:14

When I was about 5 or 6 I was swimming with family and waiting to go on the flumes. The lady in front of me turned around (I was just above crotch height) and low and behold this grizzly overgrowth was just there.... each to their own but from a child's point of view.. if it's out of control and kids see it.... it might stick with them forever! This has stuck with me for 22 years :p

sniffle12 · 18/04/2017 23:16

I think if there's one thing you aren't going to regret on your deathbed, it will probably be not shaving more.

Along with regular blow drying and ironing, life is just too short! Grin

chachaboom · 18/04/2017 23:18

Annoyed that I couldn't just sling my gear in a bag and go swimming like the male members of the family I decided if you can't beat them, join them- I bought a pair of men's swim shorts (they cover more than the ladies 'boy shorts' and match a sporty bikini top I own) so I too can go swimming at the drop of a (swim) hat.

BouleBaker · 18/04/2017 23:18

Leg and arm hair I don't give a stuff about. I don't want to see anyone's public hair in public please. Changing rooms are ok as you are getting changed in them, if you're wandering around in there doing some kind of "look at my muff" dance then not so much.

I get swim suits with short legs from decathlon as I don't want to shave and need more than a standard swimsuit as a result. I'm happy and comfortable.

PuffinNose · 18/04/2017 23:21

In the past when I've happened to notice another lady's underarm hair or leg hair. I may have accidently stared. It certainly wasn't disgust or meant to be rude. It was more a "oh! That's unusual. Ok. I'm over it. Move along".
I won't lie, I probably would notice but that doesn't mean I have opinion on it.
Go for it OP.
Body hair is the one thing I really struggle to ignore societal expectations with even when it makes my skin cry. The more women who arecomfortable enough to manage this the better.

LadyLapsang · 18/04/2017 23:21

Never waxed in my life and happily wear a bikini / normal swimsuit- just channel your inner Miranda! People who shave / wax are more likely to get skin infections etc. so it can be less hygienic.If women want to wear shorts, leggings, burkinis, then that's their choice too.

Ontopofthesunset · 18/04/2017 23:26

My pubic hair is very clean and hygienic. What is inherently more unpleasant about pubic hair than any other body hair? It's the same as the hair under your arms (or under many people's arms if you remove yours) and the same as male chest hair.

It's just hair. It doesn't have some weird obscene thing going on. It's just a few hairs. You can respect me by respecting my right to keep my body fully haired.

I can honestly say I never look at other women's bikini lines and even if I did and saw some hair why would I care? Women have hair on their vulvas.

peaceloveandbiscuits · 18/04/2017 23:43

Bear does that mean your parents either removed all their body hair or you never saw them naked as a child? I can't see why else you'd be so traumatised by seeing a woman's pubic hair.

sniffle12 · 18/04/2017 23:58

Ontopofthesunset yes yes yes. I'm all for a bit of a tidy up now and then but this obsession with eliminating all hair confuses me.

MissSingerbrains · 19/04/2017 00:17

I swim regularly and I have never looked at people's crotches so I have never noticed anyone's pubic hair, or lack of. Because I'm there to swim. Hmm

Aria2015 · 19/04/2017 07:33

This reminds me of a smack the pony scratch where she gets ready to get in the pool and her horrified friend points out her overgrown lady garden and she quips back 'no one will notice a few wisps!' GrinGrinGrin

Citizenoftheuniverse · 19/04/2017 08:13

I have a swimsuit with short legs as I can't always to bothered to deal with bikini line and find this is a good solution for me. What other people want to do is up to them.

fourteenlittleducks · 19/04/2017 08:21

I would wear swim leggings or board shorts if I didn't want to shave. I don't think it's ok to have pubic hair hanging out in public and would feel shocked! There's no need to wear a high-leg costume, if you choose to I think you should make the effort to shave/wax/Veet.

I don't think anyone will notice leg hair, but personally I prefer to remove it when I'm baring my legs. I feel unkempt otherwise. I wear surf leggings for hairy days!

fourteenlittleducks · 19/04/2017 08:23

What is inherently more unpleasant about pubic hair than any other body hair? It's the same as the hair under your arms (or under many people's arms if you remove yours) and the same as male chest hair

Would you feel the same if a man wore skimpy speedos in the pool, with his pubic hair hanging out of the sides?

Wando1986 · 19/04/2017 08:24

Honestly, grow up. It's a bit of body hair. Why do you even feel the need to remove it?

SLLM · 19/04/2017 08:26

In actual fact people WILL see you, getting in and out of the pool. In a shallow part of the wave pool at my local, a lady got out and went home cos kids kept making fun of her bush. It was very dark and very protruding

Increasinglymiddleaged · 19/04/2017 08:30

Goodness, I haven't shaved anything since I was a teenager, and my pubes fit quite comfortably in my regular style swimsuit.

Lucky you, we aren't all blessed like that.

Honestly, grow up. It's a bit of body hair. Why do you even feel the need to remove it?

I don't feel comfortable parading round with my pubes on show. I think that if you can't understand that then you need to 'grow up'.

As others have said the answer is a swimsuit with legs. I have no idea why women are expected to parade around swimming pools in nothing more than pants, it makes no sense to me at all.

Only1scoop · 19/04/2017 08:32

Your hairy legs wouldn't bother me but don't want to see any spiders legs creeping out.

EBearhug · 19/04/2017 08:33

Even if you don't shave, it's possible to swim without showing pubes. Well, it is for me, but I don't have particularly hairy thighs. Leg hair isn't the same though, and I don't see why anyone really cares. Just get on with swimming.

I've been a lifeguard and swimming teacher in my past, so spent very many hours of my life at swimming pools, and the only time I remember anything about anyone's body hair was a man with a really hairy back. People really aren't staring at your bikini line, and if they are, they're the one with the problem.

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