Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To go swimming without shaving?

425 replies

ArriettyMatilda · 18/04/2017 21:10

I am not a regular shaver. It's time consuming, occasionally itchy during regrowth and I hate myself for feeling like I have to conform to society's expectations plus I'm lazy I really want to take dd swimming more regularly but I really can't be bothered with maintaining a smooth bikini line and legs.

I am well aware that I wouldn't even be asking this if I was a man, but I can't shake the feeling that someone will be disgusted by my hair. I'm so annoyed that I feel like I have to remove part of my body to become an acceptable member of society.

Would you judge me for having hairy legs and hair around my bikini line? If you don't like shaving what do you wear swimming?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
SapphireStrange · 20/04/2017 18:14

Are you trying to make me ashamed about being a woman now?

Grin

You know perfectly well that having visible hair is not comparable to changing a tampon in public.

TakeAwayThatCaterpillar · 20/04/2017 18:15

Maybe that's not an entirely stupid comparison, nothercup (although it is about things that are a lot more intimate and possibly hygiene related). But maybe it is also a bit silly that we can't be open about things involving genitalia too.

But this is partly about gender, isn't it? If people really should cover up any area of them which is hairy, then should men with hairy backs always wear a shit?

TakeAwayThatCaterpillar · 20/04/2017 18:16

Or a shirt, even. Wearing a shit does sound unhygienic....

user1489675144 · 20/04/2017 18:18

No I wouldn't judge you. Personal choice, ignore anyone who makes a judgement.

WaitrosePigeon · 20/04/2017 18:19

Wearing a shit does sound unhygienic

Well yes, I think everyone would agree there Grin

ToastDemon · 20/04/2017 18:20

What an insane comparison. Menstruation, like urination and defecation, is a bodily function. Not shaving is just.... not shaving.

Birdsgottaf1y · 20/04/2017 18:22

"". By all means, make yourself look pre pubescent, ""

Can we stop with that bullshit.

I'd need surgery and starvation to look remotely prepubescent.

Do you ask men wiithout beards if they enjoy looking prepubescent?

FWIW, I'd always remove body hair if I have hairy bits on show (even to Doctors), but I don't care what anyone else does.

Chloe84 · 20/04/2017 19:36

@Brass

You've referred to posters as hysterical at least 3 times.

It's a demeaning, sexist term. Please stop it.

brassbrass · 20/04/2017 19:43

Chloe I'll use that term as I see fit thanks. Please don't lecture me on sexism Hmm

TabascoToastie · 20/04/2017 19:58

I never shave my legs (I do shave armpits because I find it more comfortable) and I swim all the time. And I have very white skin and the longest, thickest black leg hair you've ever seen. You could stuff a mattress. If people don't like it fuck 'em.

Turquesa · 20/04/2017 20:00

Tbh, I think this thread is very skewed in comparison to to real life. How often do you actually see pubic hair at a pool or in the beach fgs? Reading all this you'd think everyone's at it.
In 40 years of swimming at least once a week, I think I've seen it once and tbh it was not a pleasant experience. I actually couldn't believe it. I was lying on a sunbed on the beach and a woman was just standing there in a normal swimiming costume with 1-2 inches of black pubic hair coming down her inner thighs and at my eye level. She was talking to me and it was very difficult to not look shocked and pretend I hadn't noticed.
To be frank, I think it's quite unpleasant to inflict that on the public. Nor would I want to see men's pubes if they were in speedos. If you're not going to sort yourself out, wear shorts. Personally, I would rather walk around topless or naked than like that.

TabascoToastie · 20/04/2017 20:13

I swim regularly and I've never stared at another woman's crotch in the local municipal swimming pool, nor can I imagine doing so.

However I can't count how much grey chest and back hair I've seen on men and no one objects to that!

HelenaDove · 20/04/2017 20:15

I did used to get my legs waxed. Now i cant afford to. I did try shaving back in 2004 for a while, My legs became itchy, sore and i had ingrown hairs.
Shaving does not suit my skin. Therefore if a man wanted me to be free of body hair he can pay for a wax.

If its something HE wanted HE can pay.

Luckily DH doesnt give a shit.

Which is just as well because i certainly couldnt afford to date if i was single with all the expectations there are now.

Trills · 20/04/2017 20:53

How often do you actually see pubic hair at a pool or in the beach

I don't look, and people don't pose in stances that would make their pubic hair most visible. That's the POINT.

sniffle12 · 20/04/2017 21:22

I am, shall we say, fairly natural down there...

Went swimming today, popped my cossie on and looked down to check what was on show due to this thread.

Nothing was on show! A high leg bikini might be one thing but in a fairly normal swimming costume (e.g. Speedo), all was safely tucked away Grin

ChaiTeaTaiChi · 20/04/2017 21:36

Chloe I'll use that term as I see fit thanks. Please don't lecture me on sexism hmm

Then don't be so sexist. You've told women that they should hide parts of themselves away because you don't like it, and you give them sexist labels when they don't like it.
If it walks like a duck....

Willow2017 · 20/04/2017 21:38

Mother
Don't be ridiculous. A tampon isn't a natural part of your body hair is. Why the hell should women be ashamed of their own bodies? Our bodies are covered in hair why are some bits shameful and others not ?

brassbrass · 20/04/2017 21:44

Oh dear Chai it's like you can't read and your immaturity is stalking me over and over again with the same nonsense.

I've never told anyone to do anything on this thread. I did say I PREFER not to see pubes myself because I think it's lewd/grim/eeww whatever..

If someone decides to expose themselves then that is up to them. Doesn't change anything for me though. I do hope you understand now and can make some other contribution to this thread that offers some value. If not don't worry.

alltouchedout · 20/04/2017 21:50

Ok. So inner thighs which are not covered in pubic hair are fine. But the very same thighs, if hair can be seen on them, must be kept hidden. That is fucking crackers. What is so terrible about body hair? And why are you staring at other people's groins anyway?

ChaiTeaTaiChi · 20/04/2017 22:10

Don't flatter yourself, no-one would ever stalk the likes of you.

brassbrass · 20/04/2017 22:12

oh well that's a relief

TabascoToastie · 21/04/2017 01:49

I do wish people would stop banging on about "minge hanging out in public." A swimming pool is not public. Swimming pools by sheer dint of the fact the are places where people have to take their clothes off are quite private and have their own social norms and etiquette. You are explicitly not allowed to wear outdoor/day clothes, so comparison to "walking down the street" is bizarre. Do you regularly walk down your local high street in just a bikini? In changing rooms and gym showers nudity is expected and commonplace - how do the body hair phobics cope in the ladies' locker room?

I'm a serious swimmer and former competitive swimmer. I go to the pool to do my 100 lengths in the fast lane and get out. Not faff around obsessing over hair. I wear a very modest plain Speedo sports suit but it doesn't cover my thighs hence some pubes on display -- no serious swimmer swims in shorts so that's not an option. And some pools actually ban swim shorts and non-form fitting suits.

The people saying women should remove/cover up body hair because it offends them to see it - there are people who think women should wear headscarves because the sight of female head hair offends them.

dotty2 · 21/04/2017 10:22

I am a hairy regular swimmer and wear a leg suit as my pubic hair extends well past a normal costume (but only because I'm not brave - I wouldn't judge someone braver who let it show).

I still have thigh hair on show, sometimes if I haven't shaved. In a swimming thread I was on someone said to me 'I take the view that if someone can see my hair I'm not swimming fast enough', and that's my mantra now. (Obv doesn't work in the showers, but I've taken my prescription goggles off by then and that makes me slightly blurry to other people's eyes. And don't you tell me otherwise).

Bluntness100 · 21/04/2017 10:35

But maybe it is also a bit silly that we can't be open about things involving genitalia too. But this is partly about gender, isn't it? If people really should cover up any area of them which is hairy, then should men with hairy backs always wear a shit?

This is about pubic hair, no one has said cover your legs etc and no it's nothing to do with gender , male or female, having your pubic hair publicly visible is simply lewd behavuour that most people would rather not see.

And I've no clue what you mean about being more open about your genitalia in public but I'm fairly positive whatever you mean I will disagree with. I do not wish to see some strangers genitalia, I have no desire to show mine in public and I certainly do not wish children exposed to seeing adult genitalia . If you wish to either see or expose your own genitalia then go to a nudist camp.