To feel murderous rage at DH's faffing

[Oysterbabe]

Anyone have a faffer in their life that leaves them fighting the urge to kill?

In laws visiting and I cooked a meal. Was just serving up and asked DH to lay the table and sort out drinks. A few minutes later I pop my head round the door and he has one of the chairs upside down on the table and is tightening it with an allen key. Apparently it seemed a bit wobbly so he thought he'd tighten them all. They are no more wobbly now than they were a year ago.

The other day he suggested we go to the allotment straight away as DD would probably nap and we could get some stuff done. Half an hour later DD is asleep on my lap and DH is reorganizing the medicine cabinet.

He can't just do anything ever. Is it too much to ask that we just leave the house sometimes?

[starfishmummy]

I'm not a faffer but dh prove my thinks I am. He will stand by the door ready to.go, meanwhile I am still organising ds and then going round doing the things dh should have done...like turning lights off, grabbing the bags etc.

[theotherendofthesockportal]

I see you all know my husband well...

Many a time I've been busing a gut cleaning the house before HIS mother comes over and he goes to do something "useful", such a vacuum his car.

And if we have to be somewhere by an certain time he inexplicably goes for an epic poo.

[lynmilne65]

At least you still have husbands/partners

[MrTrebus]

[Ceebs85]

My name is Ceebs85 and I am a faffer

[AManWalksIntoABarOuch]

Yes. He was meant to be doing the washing up this morning. Granted, there was a lot but it took him 2hours because there was a sudden need to empty the bins which somehow, in a long winded way led to fixing the tuning issue on the TV... He wasn't procrastinating, if you'd asked he would have genuingely considered it as doing the dishes.

[Deathraystare]

he was arranging our CDs alphabetically, then by release date, then packing them in alphabetical sections so they'd be 'sorted' when they were unpacked...)


And you hadn't killed him??????!!!!

[BrownLiverSpot]

what's the difference between procrastinating and faffing? aren't they both just putting off doing what you were supposed to be doing?

[lurkingnotlurking]

I would love it if I had someone around who noticed things and got them done rather than ignoring them. I guess I must be the faffer

[Gabs55555555]

I was waiting with dd by the door earlier. Dh said he was just grabbing his coat, 5 mins later I went to look for him and he was trimming his bloody beard!!! Erm that’s not really urgent is it

[limitedperiodonly]

I did notice this was a zombie thread but forgive the person who revived it for this faffery on the day they were due to go away:

DH is using a leaf blower in the backyard

Is he still living, UserVariousRandomNumbers?

[CupOfFrothyCoffee]

and you have to guide them, using motivational phrases like “For fucks sake get in the car” etc

Haha

[user1499333856]

I'm sick of the fucking sight of mine.

He's utterly useless and I find myself despising him and all the added BS hassle he brings to our life.

I just wish he would go the hell away. Love him as I do...I think he's a prick!

[Hairgician]

whatwould omg my dp makes us late everytime we are meant to be somewhere doing the same shit as yours!!

[BigSandyBalls2015]

Perpetual - love that, 'special cleaning' 😀. It so describes DH! Not interested in the everyday running of the house type of shit but will happily waste hours cleaning washing machine drawers, or clearing the cupboard under the sink

[Rebeccatheold]

Mine is a faffer too. I let him know when there's 5 minutes to dinner and as soon as I set the food on the table he starts faffing about getting a drink. FFS!

[misstiggiwinkle]

My father is a faffer, every time he is called to the table he disappears, every time we'd go anywhere as a family in the car we'd all be outside sitting in the car waiting for about 10 minutes before he appeared. And then get stressed that we were late!

My DH is also a faffer but in a different way. For instance I'm currently ill in bed with the flu. We have 10 of his family arriving tomorrow morning for xmas. We have 2 DCs under 2. Today I gave him a list of things (bare minimum) that must be done for tomorrow for his family's arrival (that he won't cancel even though I'm actually really ill, the baby looks like she has the start of chicken pox and DS was sick this morning - a whole other thread). The list runs highest priority to lowest. Of course he started at the bottom. He is currently upstairs blowing up air beds for the nephews to sleep on (14 & 16 and totally capable of blowing them up themselves). Meanwhile the sheets & towels aren't washed, the food isn't unpacked from the shop, it's just in the middle of the kitchen floor, and the baby needs feeding. But oh no, he must do the air beds first that weren't even on the list

[TheGrumpySquirrel]

It's not just faffing, but the utter lack of prioritisation, isn't it? That's what gets me raging, as I think it's rude to the person (me) who is effectively responsible for making sure that the things that NEED to happen, happen..... brings to mind the "facilitated men" thread.

[user1471432735]

I'm the zombie reviver....

Yes he's still alive, just.

Right now we're getting dressed to go out and he's decided to iron 3 shirts. We need to leave in 2 minutes and he hasn't shaved or brushed his teeth... and he's in his underwear

I'm going to leave without him

[limitedperiodonly]

Very restrained of you user147etc. It made me laugh because a leaf blower is the ultimate faffy gadget

[anyoldname76]

yesterday my dh was hovvering the living room before my parents came for a buffet, next thing i know hes got the hoover in bits on the carpet, dust everywhere because he said it wasn't picking up very well, the hose is now broken and he had to get the brush to clean up

[user1471432735]

I hate the Fucking leaf blower. It's loud and seems to take an awful long time to do what a broom could do in a few minutes.

His enthusiasm for loud blowy gadgets doesn't seem to include the vacuum cleaner though... because that might actually be useful.

His faffing is genetic. We had lunch with his parents today and they can't complete a task in one go.. couldn't order coffees or lunch without asking the waitress to give them another minute about five times and then each time she walked away they would put down the menu and start another random conversation.

Leaving took 45 minutes because MIL had to look through the contents of her handbag for some reason.

I've been giving them false times for events for 15 years now... generally an hour is the best bet.

It absolutely does my head in but for ages I thought it was just me (and my parents and family are the opposite extreme)

[honeyharris]

I hear you. I have to build 15 minutes of what i can only describe as fannying-about time to our departure from anywhere.

[libra101]

My husband is the faffiest faffer ever!

I decide to take the dog for a walk and he agrees to go with us. I charge round grabbing jacket, scarf, bobble hat, gloves, half a dozen dog mess bags, wet wipes, lead, then catch and put dog on lead, heading out the door.

My husband is faffing around with the health app on his phone, trying to get it sorted before we finally get out!