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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Texting while driving

115 replies

Shrzx1105 · 15/04/2017 14:30

DH texts and drives sometimes. He has managed to not get into any accidents (yet...) but yesterday he almost hit a car stopped in front of us because he was texting Angry

I have told him multiple times that I am not comfortable with him texting while I'm in the car but he just told me he never forced me to get in the car with him. AIBU to ask him to stop texting and driving??

OP posts:
kingscrossnoodle · 15/04/2017 17:59

What a fucking dickhead

NoBetterName · 15/04/2017 17:59

Hard to get to work of your dead.

Get a fucking bus and let him risk his own life

And what about other road users? Tbh I couldn't give a shit if someone like this kills themselves if texting whilst driving, but what about innocent people outside the car that he could kill.

Is any text or phone call really that important that it can't wait at least until it is possible to pull over safely on the road to take it? I don't get why so many selfish and entitled pricks people are so addicted to their phones.

oldestmumaintheworld · 15/04/2017 17:59

You need to learn to drive and then report this twat to the police.

specialsubject · 15/04/2017 18:13

Ram the phone hard up his arse.

I don't care if he hits a tree, or if he kills whichever of your family are in the car with him. Clearly you don't care either or you would have taken the keys. He obviously doesn't care.

I do care if he kills or disables someone's child, parent, sibling, breadwinner.

Willow2017 · 15/04/2017 18:18

www.news.com.au/lifestyle/real-life/news-life/young-reality-stars-pledge-to-change-behaviour-after-moving-confrontation-with-crash-survivor/news-story/ead309643984899edc911c1e270e697f

Make him watch this then if he doesnt stop tell him he is pathetic he isnt that important that the world needs his txts over someone elses life.

CaptainHammer · 15/04/2017 18:20

Putting it bluntly, he is an idiot to do it but so are you for getting in the car with him.

He is lucky to not have caused an accident and I would rather walk any distance to work than get in an unsafe car.

IvyLeagueUnderTheSea · 15/04/2017 18:23

He is a prize dick. No excuse for it.

LouisevilleLlama
Why do you think we need to know you are male?

VladmirsPoutine · 15/04/2017 18:31

AIBU to ask him to stop texting and driving??

Did you honestly think someone would come along and say "Well actually, yes YABU." Confused, you sound rather blasé about it tbh.

Instasista · 15/04/2017 18:41

The reason drink drive adverts have changed from "you're going to kill someone" to "you could get arrested, have a big fine and lose your job" Is because people don't change based on the "you're going to kill someone" rhetoric. Show him all the you tube videos going, tell him about all the mumsnetters mates. It's not likely to make a difference.

All you can do is decide what you want to do now, OP. You can't control the way he drives.

thelostboy · 15/04/2017 19:23

Talk to the Police. Give them his registration number, and ask them to keep an eye out for him. They are quite keen on this sort of thing.

And if he won't give up the phone when you are with him, leave him. Seriously. He sounds an arrogant twat and I suspect his attitude and behaviour extends to other aspects of your lives. You deserve better.

If he gets hurt or worse in an accident, or loses his license or gets jailed due to an accident, he can't take you to work anyway, so you have nothing to lose.

( Also a man, btw, if we are keeping track)

LouisevilleLlama · 15/04/2017 19:28

(Prefix: I am a man)

Ivy there's currently a thread about men on MN and there's some saying that men should identify themselves on posts, there's a male poster there who said about doing a prefix to say he's male on threads to show that in most threads it doesn't matter. I thought it was a somewhat good idea as I think it's ridiculous that people say that men should and I am somewhat intrigued as to whether or not posters would actually change their responses to me if they thought I was a man. Like Rufus said on the thread they probably wouldn't do a disclaimer because they can't be bothered and I'm the same but I hope that the poster does as it'll be interesting to see responses

Shakirasma · 15/04/2017 19:37

Your DH is a selfish twat and I hope and pray he is caught by the police before he kills me, my kids or any other innocent road user or pedestrian.

PM his reg and location and I will happily report him to the police, to help make sure he is caught sooner rather than later

John4703 · 15/04/2017 19:40

angeldiver Sat 15-Apr-17 15:07:41
Take a picture, if possible, of him texting and with the speedo in the background. Then send it to the police.

I agree, stop him before he kills someone.

vvviola · 15/04/2017 19:59

This is the ad currently being shown here in Ireland about texting while driving. Another one for him to look at.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=b1n7dpvv_Ks

disappearingfish · 15/04/2017 20:07

Learn to drive, buy a car and dump the fucker. Not necessarily in that order.

NoBetterName · 15/04/2017 20:08

It is unfortunate though that sadly your husband is far from alone in flouting the mobile phone use laws.

I travel several hundred miles per week by motorbike. When you're on a bike you often get a very good view into people's cars, especially on motorways, at junctions etc because of your higher position.

I can guarantee that within any half hour journey i will see at least 6 people on their phones. Most of them openly so. Makes you wonder if the people who argue that driverless cars will increase road safety don't actually have a point. As they say, the most dangerous nut in any vehicle is the one behind the wheel.

NickMyLipple · 15/04/2017 20:21

I got a new car the other day (VW Tiguan which I think is relevant).

I downloaded this app so my phone could connect to the car, and now when I get in the car my phone seems to magically know and it goes into driving mode. This includes being in 'Do Not Disturb' mode, and texting back people who message me with "can't talk, driving".

Could you download an app which blocks his phone from having the ability to text when in the car??

IvyLeagueUnderTheSea · 15/04/2017 20:26

I see Louis, without knowledge of that thread it seems like you are saying 'I am a man and therefore I know more about this than you'; which is that in thought you were doing.

WeAllHaveWings · 15/04/2017 20:33

I wouldn't be in the car with someone who uses their phone while driving. It's non negotiable.

I wouldn't be with a man who has no regard for his, mine or anyone else's safety and was trying to bully me into accepting it because I needed the lift to work.

Time for a serious talk.

specialsubject · 15/04/2017 20:54

Ok, Smash the phone then ram it up his arse.

He is putting others at risk, and in the front seat you are one of those.

Quickest solution is destroy the phone! Do it now.

I might or might not be a man - but your husband wants dealing with.

BeverlyGoldberg · 15/04/2017 20:56

For fucks sake

LouisevilleLlama · 15/04/2017 20:58

Agreed ivy but it does also demonstrate why men shouldn't need to advertise when they post. As A) it's unnecessary as it doesn't really add anything b) looks pompous

RunRabbitRunRabbit · 15/04/2017 21:00

Find another way to get to work before he kills you when he crashes.

PUGaLUGS · 15/04/2017 21:02

I hope he gets caught, really I do.

MadameCholetsDirtySecret · 15/04/2017 21:05

He is a fucking idiot who is more likely to kill or maim an innocent because of a stupid text. You are complicit in this if you don't stop him.