To think working from home means working not looking after the children

[Sofabitch]

Grrr. DH has today off work. It's the school holidays. I checked yesterday if he would be Okay with me working from home whilst he looked after the children. He said yes absolutely fine. But he stuck his head in about 2.5 hours ago to say he was going to the Diy store. I said awesome.. assuming he was taking Dcs with. But no he didn't!

AIBU to think this was super inconsiderate of him.

Dcs arent little 8/11/16 so not majorly demanding but the 8 year old still requires attention and has been constantly popping into ask me for things until I gave up and came to sit with them.

They are booked in with child care the rest of the week. But I didnt book today as DH was off!

I can work out if I'm being irrational to be super upset at this.

Uppity what the hell do you do? Your day sounds fucking horrible.

Jesus… Uppity I don't think I could sustain that even if I was mainlining crystal meth. You only get 3-4 hours of sleep per night??

Uppity you are made of different stuff to me

UppityHumpty

wow, that's 3 hours sleep a night. I cannot do that. (tried with newborns, doesn't work). That's more than impressive

but how do you not need to sleep!

You are literally wonder woman I am in awe 😮

I'm used to it in the week (my commuting schedule is pretty similar tbh), and try to sleep in on weekends. I also nap on the train/tube/loo as needed lol

I work in investment banking which is surprisingly a family orientated industry. My schedule isn't actually that bad - if I've had nightmare office days (once had to work 24 hours in one sitting) then I'll usually be encouraged to take a half-day on Friday

Surely if kids are in breakfast/after school care then it's just a normal workday though? I mean I do that and don't go to bed at midnight and get up at 4am probably because I don't squeeze in gym and anything more than absolutely essential housework though

YABU your children are old enough to occupy themselves for an hour or so. By 8 years old, they should be able to get themselves a drink and a snack if needed.

Clearly he does not see your work as important.

@Slightlyperturbedowlagain- agree, it should be a normal workday, right? the 4am start is for my health tbh. I gain weight really fast and with pcos and wanting to ttc it's not a good thing. The gym/walking keeps me honest lol

I WFH two days a week and when my DC were small we had childcare.

During the hoidays we still have childcare as I'd never get anything done. However, when they're poorly I'm quite capable of working while they watch TV and recuperate.

It's a total deal breaker for me and i hope I never have to work 5 days in the office ever again.

I did laugh about the comment about home workers nor putting a wash on when they're working. I'd never keep on top of the housework if I didn't do the odd chore on my WFH days.

uppity yes I get that- it is virtually impossible to fit exercise in on that schedule otherwise, but I'm curious- do you not find the lack of sleep debilitating? I also wondered because there are links between insufficient sleep and disturbances of metabolic hormones which also have a very negative impact on weight-gain and PCOS and related conditions which maybe doesn't help? It's one of the reasons why shift-work shortens life expectancy over the long term. Presumably you do catch up sleep at some point?

uppity what do you do the other 4 or 5 days?

I'm an academic & WFH at the moment. I have 2 DDs (8 & 10) here but DH is a SAHD. He pops out for 20 mins every now and then. The DDs are surprisingly good about not coming in to my study. I have bose noise cancelling headphones for when they're a bit noisy. It means I can sit and have lunch with them, while still being productive. It means I don't spend 2 hours a day sat on a bus.

OP your OH was unfair.

*Working from home should mean just that - not looking after the children or popping on a load of washing etc.

I know people who "work from home" and they just take the piss.*

I work from home and I get a lot done during the day. I can cook a meal, hang or sort laundry, nip out to the gym for an hour and still get quite a bit of work done.