To think that having loud sex in the middle of the day with the patio door wide open isn't appropriate!

[TwinMummy30]

My neighbours are driving me crazy. She whines like a dying cat! Every single time. Sometimes 2 times a day. Today I was left speechless. Midday, I'm hanging the washing , my 3 kids are playing outside and then I heard her screaming "oh yeah, oh god!" Really??? It's a terraced house, their patio door wide open in fact all their windows were and they didn't even bother to shut them. I don't want to spoil things and speak to them but for god's sake don't be so loud. They are in their mid forties. Don't know what to do. That's it really, just had to get it out.

www.psychologytoday.com/blog/sex-dawn/201001/women-in-bed-whats-all-the-noise-about-part-ii

Print it out and put it through the door

I would just tell the local community police to go round and talk to them.

You can bet it's deliberate. This is an actual fetish for some people. They're using you to get their rocks off OP. I'd feel violated myself.

It's no different to seeing some man having a wank really.

Some people think the more they shag, and the louder they are, the better the relationship must be. Wrong. You just look like an attention seeking twat who is trying to prove how amazing your relationship is and how great your sex life is. Losers. People with good relationships and who have good sex, don't need to scream at the top of their voice to make sure everyone knows they're shagging.

Hers are definitely not appreciative noises. She goes on top of her voice oh ah oh yeah oh god! For an hour! Sometimes is less then that but imagine waking up in the middle of the night to it or like it happened yesterday being with your kids in the garden. It goes on and on and trust me it's not pleasant to listen to it.

In all seriousness I would just post a note.

Thought I'd let you know that as the walls are quite thin, and with doors and windows open, the whole street, including children, can hear you having sex. Please keep the noise down/close doors and windows when you have sex. Thanks.

Sort of thing.

I once yelled "oh for gods' sakes, hurry up and ejaculate so she can stop faking it and we can ALL get some bloody sleep!"

problem solved!

I once yelled "oh for gods' sakes, hurry up and ejaculate so she can stop faking it and we can ALL get some bloody sleep!

That would do it.

Imo, excessively loud sex is a form of exhibitionism.

My friend had an upstairs neighbour who not only did all the screaming and shouting, but also had a bed which banged on the floor (her bedroom was above his living room). He had several friends round one night, and when the cacophony finally stopped, they spontaneously gave her a round of applause.

She was much quieter after that. Even she never went on for an hour though.

Maybe next time she starts, you should send one of the kids round to knock on her door and check she's all right?

I'm not saying you shouldn't make any noises, or go oooh and ahhhh! But yelling and screaming at the top of your voice with the patio doors open, when there are children probably less than 30 feet away, is just weird, and frankly, unacceptable.

I re-iterate (again!) all the people I know and have known, who have loud, noisy sex, and brag about 2-3 hour mammoth sex sessions, and say their sex life is awesome, often have nothing else in their relationship.

I am not saying if you have a good sex life that the rest of your relationship is shit; just that if you feel the need to let everyone know how much you are shagging, and feel the need to yell and scream so loud that the neighbourhood can hear you; that the sex is probably the only good thing about your relationship.

Every time it starts, play this, loudly...

This reminds me of a poster on another forum who was "deeply saddened" that her neighbour complained about her "happy noises". 'Twas anti-feminist, apparently [DM sadface]

Make sure your kids are completely silent when playing outside before you complain about any noise the neighbours make.
Really?
I expect to hear kids playing around in the afternoon. I dont expect to have to listen to a sex show.
I dont get these 'you cant comment unless you are immaculate/perfect' comments.

If somebody lived in a family area (or to be honest, any housing estate) they are silly to think theyd get a silent garden on a nice day. Id be expecting yo hear kids playing, maybe dog walkers chatting, people with their radio in the garden, people having BBQs with friends etc. All perfectly acceptable (assuming none are obnoxiously loud).

She goes on top of her voice oh ah oh yeah oh god! For an hour!

Oh lord. Who has the energy for that kind of carry on?

Can you start up some kind of diy which involved rhythmic banging, just out of sync with them.

Seems you aren't alone op.
I love the note one poster got in this thread.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/2898745-Neighbours-shagging-can-I-say-anything?msgid=68198094#68198094

Yes, really MaisyPops.

I appreciate that you may live in an official Family Area, where the council has decreed that all noise is permissible except for any made during the act of creating a family.

But otherwise, all noise has the potential to be annoying. That includes noise made by your children.

@IvyLeagueUnderTheSea 😊 And some days after their session he takes his bike and goes off I'm tired by only listening to them.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=MK6TXMsvgQg

Or, try The Benny Hill music.

I challenge anyone to stay 'on task' to this.

You can't be the only neighbour pee'd off with them.