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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think that Sainsbury's security staff should have done "something!!!"

129 replies

MrsExpo · 06/04/2017 20:21

I went shopping at our local Sainsbury's. It's a big store with a large car park and I pulled into a space somewhere in the middle of the parking area. As I got my bags out of the car I noticed the window of the next vehicle was slightly open and then - to my horror - the reason was that there was a small child in a child seat in the back of the car!! Child must have been maybe 18 months or so, wide awake but quiet. Mother nowhere to be seen, so presumably in the store shopping. I waited by the car for a few minutes to see if the mother was going to reappear, but she didn't. While I stood wondering what to do, the child began to cry not surprisingly!! I should day I was just standing by my car, not staring in at the child or anything. So, I went into the store and reported it to the store security staff, who essentially said "not our problem" ...!! They refused to put out an announcement (I provided the car make and reg number), wouldn't send someone out to the car park or do anything about this at all.

AIBU to think 1) the mother behaved disgracefully(illegally??) to leave a small child like this and 2) the store security staff should have at least tried to alert the child's parent. I was in two minds about calling the police but really don't know what I should have done tbh .....

OP posts:

Blossomdeary · 06/04/2017 22:09

Let's not get hung up on gender issues; this is about the safety of the child. I am very surprised that Sainsbury's were not willing to put out an announcement to alert the parent (of either gender or none) that the child was distressed.

It is wholly unacceptable to leave a child in this way in a public car park.

ProlificPoster · 06/04/2017 22:10

Whatever the motives of the OP, lots of people do leave children in cars, and it is dangerous, so it's worthwhile having a thread about it

I don't think people leave babies or toddlers unattended for 'at least 25 minutes' while they go into large permarkets. I agree that they may if they are nipping in to pay for petrol or similar.

Crumbs1 · 06/04/2017 22:13

Show me evidence of any child actually suffering harm? Cars spontaneously combusting - not a recorded case of child death or serious injury. It's been less than 10 degrees so hardly going to die of heat stroke.
I'm not saying it's a good idea to leave a young child but just might not be quite the shock horror, call the police that most people are spouting.

Booshbeesh · 06/04/2017 22:15

Was the child okay in the end?

buntingqueen · 06/04/2017 22:21

Oh no Crumbs, you're right, let's just leave the kids in the car until there's evidence that one of them has died! If you left an 18 month old at home alone for 25 minutes, you would be accused of neglect, quite rightly! A child strapped into a car seat is no safer!

hallgreenmiss · 06/04/2017 22:24

At a shopping centre a while ago my daughter and I witnessed the police arriving at a car where 2 children had been left. When the adult eventually returned to the car, after at least 30 minutes, they were taken away, (arrested?) in the police car. We never found out the eventual outcome, but the police obviously take it very seriously.

Child(ren) locked in car while you pay for petrol I don't have a problem with, they're safer staying in the car.

dontbesillyhenry · 06/04/2017 22:26

Crumbs are you simple?
Google child dies left in car alone. The first result will tell you all you need to know about 'what's so bad about it?'

ProlificPoster · 06/04/2017 22:27

Was the child okay in the end?

The OP won't know because she left to do her shopping.

purplecoathanger · 06/04/2017 22:31

What's with all the crap about the OP writing "mother"? The real issue is the child being left.

Personally I couldn't have left the child there and gone and done my shopping. Sainsbury's should have done something and I would be writing to their CEO to complain. I would have rung the police.

Instasista · 06/04/2017 22:33

dontbesilly

How many children have died in the UK after being left in cars?

How many children are left on cars generally, and how many of those come to harm?

Quick Google will inform you

purplecoathanger · 06/04/2017 22:41

What about a child being scared witless at being left? What about the car being stolen?

Instasista · 06/04/2017 22:43

Child being scared witless is def a huge risk. Stoken not so much. Even if car theft from car parks was common they're hardly going to steal one with a kid in it

CatsRidingRollercoasters · 06/04/2017 22:46

I would have called the police and I would have stayed by the car.

FairytalesAreBullshit · 06/04/2017 22:50

I think it is stupid to leave a child in a car as so much could happen. It's ok saying we'll give me statistics. All I can reply is Portugal many years ago. That should be enough to negate anyone thinking that these things don't happen, chances are it never will, but erring on the side of caution and all that.

Say it was 30 minutes the child was left in there, you're looking at possible heat exhaustion and possible dehydration. Neither all that pleasant for a toddler.

EnglishGirlApproximately · 06/04/2017 22:54

thirtyrock whoever did your safeguarding training is wrong. I've worked in retail management for over 20 years for some major companies and not once I have heard of anyone being responsible for safeguarding children. The shop has no authority at all to get involved over and above what any member of the public can do.

dontbesillyhenry · 06/04/2017 23:05

Oh so now harm can only come to kids left alone in cars outside the UK. Righto...

Instasista · 06/04/2017 23:06

Who said that dontbesillyhenry?

Stop putting words into people's mouths

Sparklingbrook · 06/04/2017 23:07

So you call the police, and wait by the car. the parent arrives back to the car before police arrive. What then? Citizens arrest? Massive argument? Give them a lecture?

Iggi999 · 06/04/2017 23:14

Even if car theft from car parks was common they're hardly going to steal one with a kid in it
Just as well no one ever wants to abduct a kid then isn't it. Oh wait.
Odd reactions on this thread given that threads about leaving children in the car while you pay for petrol are usually 50:50!

Iggi999 · 06/04/2017 23:15

If the answer was to go to customer services, why didn't security just point the OP over to them?

Instasista · 06/04/2017 23:21

Oh yeah kids getting abducted by strangers. That happens all the time. Oh wait....

Neverknowing · 06/04/2017 23:30

Poor child very surprised about how split this thread is. 18 month old babies shouldn't be left alone in a car, yes it's unlikely they would be abducted or get heatstroke but that's not the point.
I would have called the police op! I hope the child Is okay now!

Iggi999 · 06/04/2017 23:39

I suspect it would happen more often if you could pick one up easily in your local Sainsbury's car park.

MistyMeena · 06/04/2017 23:52

Not sure where you are OP but It was 22 degrees here in the SE, I got sunburnt in the garden today. If in direct sun that car would have been really hot.

I agree the staff should have done something.

ProlificPoster · 07/04/2017 00:37

The real issue is the child being left

Not sure if the term 'real' is that applicable here.
😂

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