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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Is this a threat?

96 replies

Veiledusername · 06/04/2017 17:41

Name changed.

I just said to someone "Please don't make things more difficult, I've done what we agreed".

There response was:
"Oh I could make things very difficult for you". With the emphasis being on could.

They had raised their voice during the conversation but I can't remember if it was before or after this comment. I feel really shaken up.

OP posts:

shitgibbon · 06/04/2017 19:00

We need to know why you're being delisted to understand the situation. Is it because you will be moving if you don't go back to uni?

I don't understand why your healthcare is connected to your university exams. Can you explain this?

Original poster

Veiledusername · 06/04/2017 19:01

Sorry - yes it's a university GP surgery. To be registered there you have to be associated with the University in some way (staff, student or family member of staff or student).

The mental health is not with them, but the surgery is in an area that funds specialist mental health support for certain things, where as the area I live in does not. So I would lose the service.

The reason I said please don't be difficult is because they said they were not happy to prescribe based on me not telling them the date. This has never been raised before with me by a doctor - the practice manager told me it would be the date of the last examination last week, but no one stipulated I must know that date for the next prescription request.

OP posts:

Hefzi · 06/04/2017 19:03

Hang on, but if you weren't registered/had a change in registration as a student, then SFE would have been on your case, wanting your loan back/refusing to pay the next tranche etc - how on earth could the university not have realised that there was an issue with the GP forms? And if they weren't getting your fees, how were they still letting you attend?

My institution suspends email etc when there's a problem with finance coming through, which is a real bugger (but one that's actually very easily sorted): can you go to your Student Advice place (whoever helps with things like counselling/finance etc - often the same place) and/or the Students' Union, and get someone there to help you out with this, as this sounds totally out of order. You shouldn't be disadvantaged by a GP error, and if they have failed to pick up on it before now, that's not your problem.

Original poster

Veiledusername · 06/04/2017 19:05

I have been going to Univeristy normally.

The department submits forms on behalf of us to student services - we sign them, but they submit them. That's when student services said I was not actually registered as the GP hadn't filled out the correct forms.

The only reason I am being delisted is because I won't be a student at the University anymore.

OP posts:

GardenGeek · 06/04/2017 19:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hefzi · 06/04/2017 19:08

Are you returning to this university after the summer, OP? (One of your earlier posts said that you could continue with your treatment regime if you did, but I'm not sure if that's what you're intending to do) If you are, or if you're not sure, just say that you are, and stay listed with them - surely that would be a better option? That way, your exam dates wouldn't make a difference.

It sounds even dafter what your GP is saying now - how can they make things more difficult when they are already delisting you?!

Original poster

Veiledusername · 06/04/2017 19:09

University have been great- they have basically ignored what has happened so I can finish this academic year.

It was the GP not filling out a "return to studies" form despite doing the examination and telling me to go back. The GP has to sign the form, not the University.

I don't have an issue with university, and neither the GP, we normally get on great, jokey kind of GP relationship. I just found today really not great at all, and it left me feeling shaken up.

OP posts:

TwattyMcTwatface · 06/04/2017 19:11

And if they are a university practice, anyway they should know that the exam dates haven't been released (generally, I mean, rather than the specifics of one person's exam): you surely can't be the only person on repeat medication of some kind who will - potentially - be leaving the university this summer.

The more I think about this, the more I would be inclined, after initially saying to let it go, to make a formal complaint: something I've never felt the need to do, so I'm not saying this lightly - it becomes more bizarre behaviour on their part the more info you give

TooManyTrolls · 06/04/2017 19:12

I don't think it was a threat. I think it sounds like you were being sarky and that they replied in a sarky way. She is a professional and shouldn't respond like that but I still don't think it's that bad at all. She was frustrated with you.

I would respond to it by ignoring it and not thinking about it. It's not a biggie.

TwattyMcTwatface · 06/04/2017 19:13

Well, as long as you're OK, OP - and if you normally have a jokey relationship, perhaps this was just them striking the wrong note, trying to "banter" Put it out of your head, anyway, if everything else is OK at your end - hang in there

Original poster

Veiledusername · 06/04/2017 19:15

Hefzi Yes, if my examination results come out good enough I will be returning in September - and I have been promised a summer job in that department.

I fully appreciate if I had not done something - like not been to my reviews that the GP would not want to prescribe the medication. I think I was worried they weren't going to as it isn't something I can just get. I would need to prove that it had been reccommended originally by a psychiatrist.

The only way the GP can make things more difficult is because they can technically not sign the form I need to be allowed to sit my examinations. They did say this is a possibility, but not in a threatening way at the end of the conversation - they just said "You won't be able to sit the examinations if I don't sign you fit" And I replied "I will book the appointment in four weeks with you to do the medical". There is no reason for me to be signed off at the moment.

OP posts:

TeslasDeathRay · 06/04/2017 19:15

That sounds very inappropriate to me. I understand why you're upset; it does seem like doctors do have a power over you. Especially if you have a condition like a mental illness that relies on medication. You always have that fear that they'll stop helping you. Them saying "I could make it difficult for you" would make me worry.
I'm sorry that was said to you.

GardenGeek · 06/04/2017 19:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hefzi · 06/04/2017 19:20

^^ what Garden said.

Toobloodytired · 06/04/2017 19:21

Op, your gp is a dick. If your meds work for you, he/she is not allowed to play god with that.

Make a complaint about this wanker, he's probably being a twunt to other patients too.

I'd just make a complaint & tell the whole surgery to fuck off

Trollspoopglitter · 06/04/2017 19:22

So in theory, could you have gotten your repeat prescription from them but also registered with a new GP, and asked your new GP for a repeat prescription? Not to pry, but is it something potentially addictive that they have to monitor more carefully so patients don't abuse it? Just thinking if their behaviour was off due to what the prescription was rather than anything you said.

GardenGeek · 06/04/2017 19:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

Veiledusername · 06/04/2017 19:25

Trolls

I don't know if it's addictive - it's an antipsychotic. I don't think it's one that is abused, but I don't really know what medications are abused.

I didn't know you could be registered with more than one GP at once, I haven't done that. I don't want to change GP because of the psycotherapeutic support I am having (which is actually working). The only reason I applied to stay at my University is so that I could finish that course of treatment. I don't actually want to stay otherwise.

OP posts:

Original poster

Veiledusername · 06/04/2017 19:27

Garden I don't think they would not sign the form though. I think they would be on very dodgy ground ethically and also that I have seen a consultant recently for MH stuff and they agreed that I was fine to do this. I had a bit of a major wobble when I thought I was going to have to repeat the entire year due to this bloody form not being signed...

OP posts:

ohidoliketobebesidethecoast · 06/04/2017 19:29

*"Please don't make things more difficult, I've done what we agreed."

How is that not agressive? Please don't make things more difficult or what? What are you threatening to do?*
It isn't aggressive to say 'please don't...' anything, or a threat, its a plea!

Would you also see someone saying 'please don't hit me', as threatening? You're making up a threat where there is none..

The only way the OPs words could be seen as being anything other than sad and submissive, would be if they were said in a very tense voice, with a grim expression. I guess this is possible, if you were upset OP, and trying not to cry.

But even then the doctor should be able to see past that, and make allowance, given their awareness of her MH issue

Goldfishjane · 06/04/2017 19:32

Veiled "I had a bit of a major wobble when I thought I was going to have to repeat the entire year due to this bloody form not being signed..."

I'm not surprised!

I understand your worries re continuity of care as well, I'm in long term treatment and might have moved to a different area at one point but having a good GP is so handy!

It's quite common to prescribe anti-psychotics now. I won't ask what you are on but generally the whole thing sounds like a nightmare and also it's crazy to think about who should prescribe next while you are still that GP's patient. I also know the feeling about feeling they have power over you, it is very hard.

What do you think of the GP generally? I don't always get to see the same person at my surgery and some can be, er, interesting. If you think they are usually okay maybe let it go, but if they are normally intimidating etc then don't.

TeslasDeathRay · 06/04/2017 19:34

Regardless, it doesn't seem like an appropriate or professional thing to say to a patient.

Original poster

Veiledusername · 06/04/2017 19:37

I really like my GP [normally], I like the surgery, I do not want to leave.

They have a rule that they make you see the same GP if you are a patient with a MH condition - so you have to have all your reviews with someone that you build up a relationship with, rather than any GP in the surgery. In an emergency / for other ailments you will see anyone I think.

So yes, I may let it slide. I may drop a note to the support tutor I have though with it written down just in case. I don't know why I feel so weird about it. Maybe it is just because it was such a difference to how things normally are. But I feel really weird.

OP posts:

GardenGeek · 06/04/2017 19:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

Veiledusername · 06/04/2017 19:38

Thank you GardenGeek Enjoy your dinner!

OP posts:

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