To go on our honeymoon without DC?

[blueberrymojito]

What are people's thoughts on going on a honeymoon without DC aged 8 whilst they stay with grandparents?

AIBU to want to have a child free week away or would it be unfair to leave DC for that length of time?

I'm having this same debate! DD will be just 3. Grandparents would look after her in our home. But I still feel worried! She's never had a night without one of her parents there.

If you have your kids at your wedding, you may as well bring them on the honeymoon
Huh? Does that apply to others at the wedding? Should I bring my mum on my honeymoon? Too funny.

OP, GO!! Without DC. Have fun with your DH. There is NOTHING wrong with going away without the children. Personally, I think it is way, way healthier than those who just cannot be parted from theirs.

It depends entirely on the child and how you think they will cope.

Lovely idea and fine if the child is fine, but selfish if they will be upset.

It's just a child free holiday really, isn't it? We call it a honeymoon when it's after a wedding but it's not really anything like the original idea of a honeymoon which was that idyllic phase when you first start having sex. The sweet month.

It was lovely having our children (4 & 6 at the time) at our wedding but it was also bliss having a short honeymoon (5 lovely days by Lake Maggiore) without them, going for random walks, sleeping late, enjoying just being on our own together. Ours were very happy with their GPs, especially as it was half term and their uncle, aunt and cousins were also staying after coming down for the wedding. Enjoy yourselves!

To my mind it makes a huge difference whether you're both the child's parents or not. If you are the parents and getting married then that decision is no different to any other decision to go on holiday without your kids (I wouldn't, plenty do).

If you are marrying someone that is not the child's parent then I strongly disagree with it. In that case it is a horrible start to 'new family' life - excluding the child and for the child's parent to let them know that someone else is more important to them than the child now.

Our DS will not be coming on our honeymoon! He's staying with SIL for 5 days whilst we go to NYC!

Plenty of time for family holidays in years to come God willing.

Go, enjoy your honeymoon, have fun.

Willing grandparents, happy DD?

Go, go, go!!

Enjoy!

X

Quite shocked at some of judgey responses! Of course it's fine, and totally normal. I think it's good for kids to know the world doesn't revolve around them anyway tbh, and bet they'll have a lovely time at grandma's. Go! Have a lovely time.

"After kids marriage is just a formality" is another way of saying "how dare you have sex out of wedlock". Fuck 'em, go have (kid free) fun!

Isn't this a little bit like closing the stable door after the horse has bolted, you've kids now take them with you

I don't think any of my or DHs children feel unwanted because he and I went on holiday without them. We did go on a family holiday a week after the wedding and then our honeymoon was a couple of months later.

I would and did, DD was 6. She stayed with my sister and had a blast with her cousins!!

YANBU OP

I'm having a similar (ish) debate with my DS (10) at the moment, DH & I are having a 1 night stay in a lovely hotel in the Lakes for our Anniversary later on this year, DS is outraged (yes, said outraged that we're going without him (we go away as a family a few times a year so he's not deprived).

Go and enjoy and congratulations, your DC will be fine

Yanbu as long as both the child and grandparent are happy.

Sounds amazing.

The children are part of your family, I could never go away and leave my children. I would (silently) judge anyone that did.

Why should a child feel unwanted if you go away without them???

Some classic narrow minded views on display here

Of course you should do it OP. Have fun & good luck

I did it OP, we didn't have a passport for DD though and for surname purposes i don't want one either incase it's a pain in the arse getting out of the country or into another. My DD was 2. No regrets. She was happy with gran and grandad living in our house for a week to look after her and we had a nice time too. I was Pg at the time and it was nice for us to get away before dd2 arrived xx

We went away for our 40th last year when ours were 6 and 10. They stayed with their grandparents and were absolutely fine.

They were a bit put out at first when we told them, but when we reminded them we would be having a family holiday later on in the year they were fine.

I just wish we could afford to do it every year, as it was absolute heaven!

Congratulations on your wedding, go and have a fantastic time knowing your DC are having an equally fab time with their GP.

RainbowPastel lucky we are all different, as I would (silently) judge parents who were so insecure they cant go away and enjoy each others company whilst their children are having fun in a safe and secure environment. Poor DC is what I say!

Depends on the children and how they feel about it, but I think it is reasonable and won't harm them. My caution is coloured by the fact that a friend went on hols leaving her dc with their fab aunties once, aged about 5 and 8, and I am sure everyone told her they were fine (which I am sure they were really), but I saw them out and about a few times during that week and they looked so sad and bereft. But I don't think they were scarred for life or anything. I think if I was doing it I would like it if they could go somewhere exciting too, like a day at a theme park or something they have wanted to do.

We're going on a babymoon in a few weeks and DS is staying with the GPs for 2 nights. I'm pg and my DM actually offered. Sooooo looking forward to it. 2/3 whole days of just adult company, spa, swimming pool, walks in the countryside etc.

Go for it. A week is really no big deal. You're a person and a couple too, as well as parents.