MiL has been here 60mins...

[whatatod0]

Oh god. parents-in-law have been here 1 hour into a 7 day visit. They are already annoying me.
MIL likes to help/take over my kitchen and she doesn't listen when I tell her to go and sit down (nicely). If I give her a job to do she just gets in my way and takes forever to do it.
I want to run away for the week.

You complain but have no solution.
You young women and I say women as likely your DPs don't notice, should tell us mothers and mils how you want us to be.

Well there isn't a solution is there? The problem is that DILs and MILs kind of get shoved on each other whether they are each others type of person or not. The only link is DP/DS, its frankly a recipe for disaster. What's more surprising is that most get on as well as they do

You have much criticism of us so just shout it out.
You come across as the type of person who says "just say what you want", but if anyone does you'll decend into a "well I just can't win can I" pity party and use it as an example of how "difficult" your DIL is even though you goaded and asked for "honesty"

I also love the way it's being made out to be a problem created by generation X, Y and Millennials. My MIL couldn't stand her own MIL.....

I would love to hear what all these mothers in law had to say after they have visited some if you

Just like the babysitting and the "giving you dosh", I'll keep a lookout incase it ever happens.

Surely, if you are confident in yourself, remarks or criticism from a mil would not bother you?
But many of us aren't confident in ourselves and these kind of remarks, from MIL or DM, upset and undermine. There are very few relationships where you are expected to host someone for an extended period of time and put up with remarks or criticisms that cut to the quick whilst remaining perfect happy to do so.

Lolly - yes. And not just once either. These things happen every time they visit, so you end up becoming anxious even before they've arrived, and are tense to begin with.

Ahh I love a good MIL rant fest :)
A week with mine would make your hair stand on end..and she thought she could come for 3 months! Screw that at my age..I'm too long in the tooth to have my agenda dictated by anyone, not least a woman who thinks 50 year olds still need direction
Yes I'm sure she has a lot to say about me too..but I'm not the one forcing my presence without asking or agreeing on a time or duration that is mutually agreeable for all.
Yes OP, a week can feel like an eternity when you don't feel comfortable in your own home.
The wine remedy is a good suggestion, and if your MIL is anyway judgemental like mine, she'll be making alcoholic inferences after the first glass!

I think if dils were treated with respect, then they would show respect back.

She sounds lovely lol i would love someone to come and stay and want to help out! Send her over mine lol x

My mil is now dead, but the last time she came to stay she got so ridiculously drunk, came onto my friend and pissed everywhere! She never came again. (she wasn't elderly, just a mess !)

Mine wants to stay but has realised we all drive each other nuts after a few hours. Now they stay in a hotel and we see them for a couple of hours each day over a weekend instead. Hopefully this week will make them realise it's not a great idea!

Be as nice as you can to her. A week isn't so long. Perhaps divide up the jobs, eg ask her to make a particular meal and then go out, arriving back when meal hits table.

She wont always be around and then you (and or your dcs) may find you miss her. Only when my MIL died did I realise how much she meant to my dcs

I wonder that if mils didn't force themselves on to us then we just wouldn't ever see them?

There are very few relationships where you are expected to host someone for an extended period of time and put up with remarks or criticisms that cut to the quick whilst remaining perfect happy to do so

If it is that bad then surely your husband or partner should be having a word with his mother. If that didn't work, he should tell her she can't come for long visits if she can't reign in her behaviour.
Your husband is not very supportive if he allows his mother to undermine or criticise you when he knows it upsets you.

haha my mil comes every summer for 2 months! (She lives on the other side of the world!) Been tough at times, but to be fair she doesn't interfere or give unwanted advice!

I could probably point out if my mum suggested staying for a week I would want to run away from home😃 I do love her but her useful suggestions annoy the hell out of me. I'm 50 and can actually run my life, family and job ok. And no I can't just ignore it 😞

The usual MIL bashing. What a crowd of crashing bores you are.

We are going off tomorrow to spend 11 days with the in laws, the live in a different country than us. Mil was here 8 weeks last year when we had baby dd to help in the house and with dd1. She's nice, sweet and I'm sure trying her best. It's not always easy but I know she means well and loves the girls. It's a matter of give and take and have respect for one another

You would be on here complaining if she sat there all idle doing nothing. She is only trying to help.

Yes, I would love to spend a week sitting on the sofa!