To set this car on fire (parking with pics and diagram)

[BillyButtfuck]

We have been out all day working, I left at 8 and have just picked my boys up to take them home to bed. We came home at the same time (2 cars) and someone has parked across our drive blocking one of our parking spaces. We've managed to get one car on but sort of in the middle of our two spaces and the other car is a few roads away. I don't mind parking and walking but we pay a lot in rent for a property with a driveway with two spaces. I feel I should be able to use it!!!
I've had a bad day anyway so probably seeing red and over reacting but come on, why do people fucking do this

On the photo the red star marks where the dropped kerb to allow access to our driveway begins.
On the diagram the pink cunt is the car. Our houses are link detached. The green is the only bit if verge on the whole road. The rest is all dropped kerb for the parking spaces on people's drives. The verge bit has a proper kerb but is no way long enough to have a car on without blocking either me or ND2.

Poo under the door handles. Preferably cat poo as it fecking stinks.
I have never done this ever

Can you not park your second car on the road behind Cunt Car?

You'd only be blocking your own drive so not a problem

I've parked right up their arse now but am slightly overhanging ND1s drive but have gone in and explained and she's fine with it. ND2 and I do not get on and no way they'd get on board with blocking the front and their drive
DP has stuck a massive note on their windscreen with duct tape.

Maybe I'm being April fooled ?

Diagram and photo? You've raised the bar, OP.

Try leaning on it and setting the alarm off.

80's style neon diagrams rock, and should be the official Mumsnet way from now on.

Set it on fire, shoot owner with crossbow, then leave note for grieving relatives about parking in front of dropped curbs.

Have you got a dropped curb on your second space?

They are Snapchat diagrams

Rollon yes this entire section of the road (end of a cul de sac) is dropped except for the grass but which has a proper kerb

10/10 for diagrams, pics and swift retaliation!

Snapchat? Oh good lord.

That is ingenious. I thought snapchat was just for teens to take rude pics because it disappears after 60srconds except everyone screenshots it, you ridiculous children

YWBU to set the car alight. You have two cars. Block the bastard in and don't reply when he comes calling to ask you to move so he can get out.

Smile oh no it's great for diagrams. I took a photo of my black work trousers for a background and then annotated in neon colours for clarity.

Call and get it towed. Now a car is on the driveway they may come. if you can't get on they don't.

Or be charitable this time and not so if there's a next.

What was on your note ?

YY to bumping the door to set off the alarm (not with your car though, I think if you bump it with your behind it can set it off)

I think I love you a bit Buttfuck

Your use of neon is beautiful.

😍

we have had a car parked outside our house for around 8 weeks,so everytime I want to park I have to reverse park, I think whoever it is is cheeky, they have not moved the car at all, I have a friend coming on holiday with me and I think he can leave his car across the road for the next year!!! because that is where the car is from.

DPs overly nice note was along the lines of

Please do NOT park over dropped kerbs or block our driveway it is in constant use.
It is extremely inconsiderate and selfish.

I wanted cunt stronger language in there.

Fire is totally justified. Lovely diagrams

Cracking diagrams / photos. But why is there a giant cock airbrushed onto your grass?

Janice That's my version of the Cerne Abbas Giant or the reflection of my arm maybe.

Veronicat...Fox poo is even better for a high, putrid stink value!

I have never done this either

What a knob, it looks like there's loads of space in front?

I'm going to go against the majority here and give them the benefit of the doubt..it does look a bit like a path and they may have done it in error. I do love a good parking thread but I think this one is just an accident. From your second picture though, I do feel like they could have driven a bit more forward which would have given you more room.

Any rugby players live near you op?

Yuk I really hope you're right and it is just a mistake. I don't understand why anyone would park over a dropped kerb, it's basic driving stuff.

Wish there's a rugby tots group! But alas I don't think this will get as exciting as that thread did.