To slip into a deep depression?

[sadzak]

On mat leave 8mo DS, plus 13yo DS DH works away at least one night a week. He has left this morning due back tomorrow night then will be away again Thursday morning until Friday night

Yes I know lots of other people have it much worse than that, yes I knew all this before we married/ had DS2 etc but every time he leaves and I know he isn't coming back that day I just slip into despair and depression that I will be on my own all night with the baby.

Podrig I see what you mean... I have done Atkins before numerous times and only started last week but it could be contributing

And also drinking! Swap the booze for proper carbs. You won't reach ketosis whilst drinking, its full of carbs. Give it a try.

Ahaha I am a ketosis queen tho vodka soda water and a tear drops worth of cordial keep those ketostix turning red

I am not drinking ATM tho

Also can I just apologise aswell for my short replies I am using phone and usually only have one hand free so long replies are tricky x

I made the appointment for Tuesday, asked for a lady GP but they said only nurse clinician available hope she can help xx

Have bookmarked your post, OP, as I have recently been diagnosed with PND and totally understood that feeling of dread you described. I read your post to my OH and he said "that sounds like you - maybe she has PND?" When I got to your post about Atkins we both agreed that's probably not going to help, especially if you're drinking a bit too much.

How are you today? X

Thank you that is so nice!! Another bad day TBH. DH has gone to London this morning but on the plus side I decided to go to McDonald's for chicken nuggets I am sat in the car eating them now like a junkie

I know I will get better x

Good for you. You need the carbs in those nuggets. And chicken is full of tryptophan essential amino acid, which makes you feel happier and helps you sleep. Get those nuggets down you! You can diet when you aren't having to spend every morsel of willpower you have keeping everything together for the baby. And yes, you will get better. :)

I've been to GP emergency appointment today instead of Tuesday... I'm not sure what to make of my GPs response.

He said all parents get those thoughts and being a parent is physically and emotionally draining for everybody. You have to just try and force them out of your mind. I explained to him that I have been doing that for last 8 months. He said you sound like you might have postnatal depression and you should've come in sooner. I said I know I didn't though because of everything what you have just said and I was thinking the same too.

He said he will send the health visitor round and recommended that I have a "girly chat" with a friend or family member. And to go back in two weeks for a follow-up appointment.

My problem is I don't really want to speak to a friend or family member about it, I don't want everyone knowing and I know they all say the same to me like he just said, it's hard for everyone and snap out of it.

Not sure what to do next really?

Sounds very patronising! Having a 'girly' chat - really?! And what exactly is the use of saying you should have come in earlier! Well done for telling him exactly why you didn't and quoting his own words back at him.

You shouldn't have to speak to a friend/family about this. I don't see how that would be helpful. Is there another GP in the practice you could see. This one sounds pretty unhelpful. So sorry to hear this is how it went today. Very disappointed for you.

There probably are other GPs in the surgery but I don't know any of them particularly well because I hardly ever go to the doctors

Yes I am a bit miffed he has made me feel a bit daft

I wasn't sure what to expect but I was not expecting that

Depression foesnt care if you are old or young, rich or poor, male or female etc. So please don't think because you have it all that your depression is not serious.
Must make an appointment with your GP and discuss things like you have done here. Please take care

I meant with another GP not this one as he doesn't seem to think you are serious

Patronising prick

Fwiw the last thing I need or want atm is a "girly chat" - I just need something to stop me from coming to any harm. I'm not surprised you feel similarly. Being depressed is hard enough without having to open up to people you really don't want to have to open up to

I would very very very strongly suggest you see another GP. What you have been told today is absolutely bloody awful.

Fwiw I found that talking to younger Drs was easier- they seemed almost more prepared to accept MH problems

He was young ish mid 30s - 40s.... I don't know

I think I'll wait for HV she likely be better equipped and deal with more of this

FFS, OP. What a stupid statement from the GP. The only helpful thing might be speaking to a HV.

I had PND after DD2 & the GP sent a HV around (who I hadn't met before). She was a life-saver (literally, as it turned out.)

My experience is that you often have to fight to get appropriate treatment for mental illness--and that about 75% of GP's are poor when it comes to mental health so it's can be a case of having to go back and speak to someone else.

I can see already it's going to be hard ... I imagine it's hard to diagnose/ treat aswell.

DH came home tonight drove to London for a 2 hour meeting and drove home about 3.5 hours each way. I know how lucky I am xxxx

Hopefully the HV will have far more awareness and experience of PND and helpful ways to treat it. Tho your GP should be no stranger to it I'd have thought.

It shouldn't be hard to diagnose as it's not exactly a rare thing. I'm sure not everyone has the same symptoms with it but even so.

My GP at the time was generally atrocious but he managed to diagnose mine and that was many many years ago. I remember him giving me a questionnaire with about 15 to 20 questions for me to tick off any of the ones I had.

I'm really disappointed for you that your GP was quite as useless (and bloody patronising) as they were :( What good is speaking to a friend or relative going to do? Unless they're trained counsellors/psychologists/pyschiatrists ). Don't lose hope. This is treatable and hopefully your HV will be far more on the ball.

How are you doing today?

Ok. Started great, been going slowly down hill since then

Every morning I think "ugh you were such a knobhead yesterday pretending to be sad when you're clearly not" ..... then as the day goes on I'm like "well that was a bit rubbish" or "that made me think of something awful for an hour and a half" and by this time I'm sort of on the edge of a crying sesh or narky as fuck

I don't know if I'm depressed or just turned into the biggest assface in the world

It sounds awful sadzak. It sounds like proper depression and it really is hell. Been there. Tell the health visitor about this and be sure to tell her how debilitating it is and that a girly chat is unlikely to fix it

You are not an assface I promise

I hear you OP.

I'm no mat leave, have 3 month old baby and 20 month old toddler. DP home at the moment (military) but I'm on my own with them 12+ hours a day, in a new area with no friends so it gets very lonely.

DP announced yesterday he is being posted in Jan for 6 months, I feel sick just thinking of it

I second trying groups with the kids, you might meet some new friends. for you