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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU about overnight guest having her own overnight guest?

78 replies

AyUpMiDuck · 24/03/2017 16:19

My third/spare bedroom is listed on Airbnb as a Large single room with a 4ft bed. It clearly states that the booking is for one person sharing a bathroom with me and my son. Victorian semi nothing grand. I've hosted a lot of guests over last 4 years without drama.
Last month I took an advance booking from a young woman (29) who had good reviews - polite and tidy etc. She said she was coming here - her old home town -for 2 nights to catch up with friends and would be going out in the evenings.
I wasn't home when she arrived yesterday I arranged for my DS let her in and give her a key. I had sent instructions by text asking her to bolt the front door etc when she comes in at night. I heard her come in at 1 am but did not get up. During the night I heard her bedroom door and the bathroom door open and shut and loo flush at 2.30 am, 3 am and then again at 5 am. ( I don't sleep very soundly and can do without the extra noise tbh). I sent her a text to ask if she was alright - I honestly thought she might have an upset tummy or food poisoning. No reply.
I got up at 8am and, as usual on a school day, started making breakfast. She came down to get a drink and to meet me. Then this: "I hope you don't mind my boyfriend stayed last night". Well I did mind . I was extremely assertive and said at the very least she could have texted me to ask. I also said: did he come up with you (ie from down south) she said yes. I said well, where did you think he was going to stay? She just kept saying sorry. When I pressed her she said he had been going to go back the same day but then he didn't. I reminded her she could have sent a text even if it was late.

AIBU to want to know who is sleeping under my roof at night?

What I find amazing is that there are plenty of places on Airbnb that are self-contained, or with an ensuite (and a proper double bed). Why stay in a guest room in a family house? I can't work out if she is gormless or really thought I wouldn't notice that she had snuck her boyf in. She is due back later and but I won't be giving a key out again.

OP posts:
sonjadog · 24/03/2017 16:23

I think she has broken the conditions of the rental. I would ask her to pay for the extra person, and I would leave a bad review for her on AirBnB saying what has happened. Apart from that, I´d let it go. Maybe I´d see if there any adjustments that can be made to the text of the AirBnB listing to make it crystal clear to future renters that one person really means one person.

Bluntness100 · 24/03/2017 16:25

I can't work out if she is gormless or really thought I wouldn't notice that she had snuck her boyf in

I love that word gormless, haven't heard it for years. 😂

She knew the rules, you can ask her to abide by them or not come back.

ErrolTheDragon · 24/03/2017 16:25

YANBU, of course. It's your home. Isn't there anything in the AirB&B ts&cs?

NotYoda · 24/03/2017 16:26

I agree with sonjadog. Do that. Really not on of her. I'd find it off if a friend did it, but for someone with whom you have a contract.....

Mummymoanasaurus · 24/03/2017 16:26

She picked someone up and it was a one night stand! Even worse! Did you believe her?

Original poster
AyUpMiDuck · 24/03/2017 18:33

Ooh I'm so pleased its not just me being prissy. Just thought she had a proper cheek.
Sonjadog My Airbnb description is crystal clear and states the room is for One person. Even the heading is Large Single Room....Later in the description I mention an additional charge if there is a second person but they first have to contact me about it.

I will write an honest review . I hate leaving bad reviews but if someone else had been honest it might have highlighted a potential problem and I would have declined her booking. I'm doing it for the community!

Mummymoan- she said he is her boyfriend! I didn't even see him as she offered to ask him to leave when I said it was Not Okay.
Thought it was odd that she left her shoes in hall last night but his were not there. Cunning eh?
Errol nothing specific in Airbnb T & C but there's a community board which might be interesting.
Does anyone else do Airbnb in their own home?
Can I segue into another, related, topic: For people who stay in a private shared house for more than one night is it Reasonable that they come and go with their own key?
I seem to remember old fashioned B &Bs used to turf you out all day. I don't like giving a key because it makes me really jump when they come in unannounced during the day (I work from home) but if you give them a key because they are going out late then its tough to get it back the next day if they are staying on- particularly since I am not home all day every day. My current guest has been told to ring the bell to warn me even if she is using key. Am I overthinking this?

OP posts:
sonjadog · 24/03/2017 19:49

I would expect my own key and would want to come and go as it suits me. I feel that in paying for the room, that includes access to it during the day as well. I wouldn´t be interested in renting a room where I had to clear out during the day and wasn´t allowed back. I understand that that can be annoying for you, but I think it comes with having a paid guest...

Theresnonamesleft · 24/03/2017 19:57

I've seen listings on air bnb where it states you are not allowed in the house from something ridiculous like 9 in the morning until 6 at night. I avoid those. I don't want to have to wake early to leave I want to sleep in if I can. I don't want to have to stay out all day either

kali110 · 24/03/2017 20:00

Agree with Sonja i wouldn't want to have to clear out in the day of somewhere i was paying to stay in.

Hedgehogparty · 24/03/2017 20:04

She thought she'd got away with it, but didn't .
Basically I suppose she was trying to save money.
You need to know who is in your house.
She knew she was breaking your rules, so you need to post your review.

expatinscotland · 24/03/2017 20:07

I don't think YABU about her bringing a second person in. Personally, I'd have streeted her. But I'm also amazed people are willing to pay to stay in a total stranger's house with them in it, sharing a loo with them and being streeted all day. You must have very cheap rates.

Secondly, you sound very anxious. You don't sleep soundly, you 'jump' if someone comes or goes during the day.

BoomBoomsCousin · 24/03/2017 20:09

You can say people can't stay during the day, but you will likely get fewer takers. If you mainly get people staying for just one night (overnight before a work meeting the next morning maybe?) it might not make much difference.

Have you considered getting an electronic lock where you can set the hours a key fob or entry code works for? Might be more money than it's worth though.

ImFuckingSpartacus · 24/03/2017 20:23

She was wrong yes.

Did you seriously though text a paying guest in the middle of the night because you thought they used the loo too many times? Because that is crazy.

MsJudgemental · 24/03/2017 20:33

She shouldn't have had someone staying over with her if she only booked for one, but you can tell her that she can't be in during the day!

gillybeanz · 24/03/2017 20:36

She was wrong but I think texting someone who is paying you for their room in the middle of the night is out of order.

I wouldn't stay anywhere where I was expected to be out at certain times of the day, or where I didn't have a key to come and go as i pleased.

dowhatnow · 24/03/2017 20:36

Presumably it was a lot cheaper to pay you for one? Or she copped off with an old friend or stranger. Either way I wouldn't like it but then you are opening up your home to total strangers and I suppose abuse of this is unfortunately par for the course.
I think i might have asked her to leave as she broke the terms of the contract..

RiversrunWoodville · 24/03/2017 20:49

I would probably have asked her to leave too (also slightly dubious about the boyfriend but that's irrelevant she still broke terms). I would definitely change extra though and leave a bad review though. I am wondering about the texting in the middle of the night for the loo though I have IBS and I'd be mortified Blush

Notso · 24/03/2017 21:00

She was wrong not to declare a second guest.
However I think texting her about using the toilet was bizarre. I would hate that as a paying guest.
I do think that people should be able to come and go freely.
This is the kind of thing that puts me off air b&b.

HemlockStarglimmer · 24/03/2017 21:18

We let out a single room with Airbnb. I read your post to my husband and he says that as she has broken Airbnb rules you should report her directly to them. She may get banned and you may get compensation.
Outrageous behaviour!

Huldra · 24/03/2017 21:21

Agree about the texting about going to the toilet, that is very wierd of you. If you don't sleep soundly and could do without the disturbance then airbb may not be for you.

Is it room only , or would their have been an extra charge for an extra guest?

missm0use · 24/03/2017 21:25

I use Airbnb for our home, however we are a b&b and have a self-catering flat. (Big house with 3 floors) I would be absolutely fuming if one of our guests had done something like that! In fact - I'd tell them they'd broken the t&c of their booking, that they had to pay extra to cover their additional guest and that we would not longer offer them accommodation!

Phone Airbnb and make a complaint about this individual and also leave an accurate review of how she behaved in your home!

EssentialHummus · 24/03/2017 21:28

As a guest I'd have wanted the earth to swallow me before hearing from my host about my bathroom habits.

If you host frequently, install a key code lock or small key safe by the door.

SuperFlyHigh · 24/03/2017 21:56

I have rented Air B n B's but would never sneak an extra person in.

I'd do as missM0use says her behaviour is not on and you don't know this man from Adam, he could be anyone.

Ohyesiam · 24/03/2017 22:18

You ate not over thinking. You need to do whatever makes your home feel safe and comfortable

FoodieToo · 24/03/2017 23:02

God I will never use Air B and B . It sounds like staying with your mother.