Shouty horse rider!

[SittinginaSleazySnackBar]

We live in quite a rural area, our boundary fence backs onto a large playing field. We have people parking up with horse boxes alongside the boundary fence quite regularly.
I was playing with DD (1) in our garden this morning, she was just pottering in her Wendy house, not making much noise at all just happily babbling and I was talking back to her.
I then hear a woman trying to get her horse into the horse box and the horse is having none of it, stamping its feet and rearing up.
Next thing I can hear a woman telling me to shut my daughter up, shes scaring her horse.
Was I unreasonable in thinking that a horse should be able to cope with a baby babbling especially if she is riding it along country lanes ! I refused to tell DD to be quiet or to go inside as surely we aren't being unreasonable playing in our own garden !
I have no clue about horses so second guessing whether I was rude, plus we are fairly new to the area and everyone knows each other.

I don't particularly care that I'm not a horse trainer. If you own a horse, you are responsible for its behaviour and training. Horse owners shouldn't be shouting at babies just because they haven't trained their horse. It's not the baby's fault, it's not the horse's fault, it's the stupid owner's fault every time.

I once got told that my push chair was upsetting a horse.

Wasn't much I could do about it at the time, stop and take DD and fold it up?

I just kept still and waited for them to go past.

On another note, I know a dog who is very scared of wind turbines. He barks at them and gets very upset. His owner goes a different way for walkies.

My dog is fine with horses we meet when we're out and will sit quietly while we let them go past.

Horses going past our house are quite a different matter though, and they have to be barked at. Thankfully, she's never out in the front garden and the horses don't seem to mind. We live near a couple of racing yards, and they road work the horses round here most mornings.

Blubberball - I'm sure every riders aim is a bombproof horse - who wants to be prancing around uncontrollably on Tarmac or near other people. unfortunately it's not quite as simple as tying a few balloons up for a few days.

Yeah sure, it's easier to just blame everything else. It's the horse's fault, it's the baby's fault, it's that dog's fault, that plastic bag shouldn't have been there, that aircraft shouldn't have flown over. It's never the owner's own stupid fault. They just blame everything else, never learn from their own stupid mistakes, and think that the world has to adjust and be quiet to the point where a baby can't even play in her own garden.

YANBU, please don't think we're all a bunch of entitled twats, I'm actually very nice!

My first horse used to try and race cyclists, that was embarrassing but it definitely helps if you say hello!

My second horse was so rave (as my current one is proving to be!) but he once freaked out at a small boy wearing a brightly coloured scooter helmet. I'm pretty sure once he realised what it was he felt pretty sheepish and then went up to say hello.

Do remember that some horses are young (as my number 3 is) and in order to get them to be safe on the roads, you have to expose them to stuff on the roads. A bit of patience and understanding from both sides is always very helpful.

ETA- I know it looks like I've had loads of horses, but no 2 was supposed to be my horse of a lifetime but he got pts last year

I'm more than happy to help out and make someone's life a bit easier but expecting me to ease through waist high stinging nettles and climb through a wet and muddy ditch to hide in the hedge is more than a bit entitled.

As it was my dog was already on his lead and wasn't barking or leaping around. I made him sit and held him by his collar but the rider still got extremely shirty with me

Blubberball - you sound as if you have a thing about horses. My point was that horse riders generally want a bombproof horse and do what hey can to achieve that (why wouldn't they? It's much safer for them) but it can be difficult to achieve and even on a calm horse will take years. Even the most bombproof can decide they don't like a particular plastic bag after years of being okay with them.

Riding a horse through a regular busy park is idiotic. If it was kids doing that I'd have told them off. (Unless it was a bridleway in Hyde park!)

Miaowthecat I'm sorry you've had poor experiences with horse riders, but it's really unfair to label us all as " entitled snobby pricks".

I wouldn't choose to ride through a busy park at a busy time and I certainly wouldn't shout at anyone ( except in an emergency) but if you came up to me and said you were fearful of horses (rather than "keeping the fuck away")

I would do everything in my power to help you engage with my mount safely, or keep as far away as possible, whichever you preferred.

Of course you can get arrogant horse owners just like in any other walk of life but in my experience horse people tend to be quite down to earth because horses are great levellers.

Blubberall the point is that horses are not machines, even the most highly trained animals and experienced and responsible owners encounter problems sometimes.

My point is that stupid horse owners blame everything else except for themselves. It's the owner's fault every time. Horses teach hard lessons, and it's up to the owners to learn and pay attention. By blaming the whole world and expecting it to be quiet for them, they are never going to learn from their own stupid mistakes, because they never admit to making mistakes. The horse didn't want to go into the box, that is 100% the owner's fault, and 100% not the baby's fault.

Eh? In my experience horse owners are well aware that 'it was the bag' or 'the brolly' or the 'lawnmower'. That doesn't mean they expect the world to be quiet for them - although if someone riding a horse asked me nicely to stop doing something while they came past I would be happy to help. Would be weird not to imp

Everybody WBU.

Shouty Horse rider WBU - of course it's up to the horse owner to get their horse used to all types of situation and not to take a nervous horse in a public place. In an ideal world every horse would be used to every noise they might conceivably ever hear in their lives and every flappy plastic bag that might make them startle would be out of sight.
Shouty horse rider was rude and made the situation loads worse for herself and horse. She was also probably panicking and frustrated.

Horse WBU - to be scared. But horses are big, strong and naturally scared of strange things that might eat them. They only allow themselves to be controlled by humans because they're thick not scared of us.

Baby WBU to sound (to a horse's ears) like the distress scream of a foal getting eaten by a sabre tooth tiger.

OP WBU not to quieten baby. Big scared horses are dangerous and hurty. If a horse is having a freak out because of some random sight or sound, best thing to do is try to assist by stopping the noise before explaining calmly to the horse that it's being unreasonable.

IWBU to post on a thread where nobody is ever going to agree.

Actually if your dd WAS making a noise which caused the womans horse to rear up and injure her (not that this happened here)- you may be at fault

Not a chance, fuck that. Baby making noise in own garden is not remotely responsible for the daft mare trying and failing to get her daft mare into a box.

And if your horse is scared of umbrellas or dogs or baby talk, you need to not let your horse be out around umbrellas or dogs or babies. You can't expect people to pander to your horsey needs.

Blubberall I agree that horses are great teachers and that horses are sometimes wrongly blamed by their owners for mistakes or omissions that their owners have made. However, that is considered poor horsemanship and is generally very much frowned upon.

Blinkybell the horse owner in your example was v rude and you should have been thanked for your trouble.

Ha ha I agree with you Haff

The horse was just being a horse, and the baby was just being a baby. It was the stupid owner being stupid and making mistakes. Did she take a good look at herself and think I wonder what mistakes I'm making, what I should be doing differently? No. She decided that it was the baby's fault, and shouted at the baby.

Out of interest since this is a topic with lots of horsey people on it (and I assume most of you aren't entitled twats!) What am I meant to do when I'm driving behind a horse on a country road? I'm a new nervous driver so tend to just stay well back unless it's a very long straight, wide road so I can overtake very comfortably. On the other hand this sometime creates a queue of traffic and sometimes someone behind me gets really pissed and overtakes the whole lot which is presumably even more dangerous than a car overtaking a single car. What am I actually meant to be doing?

I've never seen a horse in a park!

Have you never heard of Rotten Row in Hyde Park? Admittedly, I've never seen anyone do more than a trot, and reckless people on bikes or rollerblades are much more of a hazard than riders, but it can't be the only park where horse riding is allowed.

Pop you're doing the right thing in staying back. Obviously if it's safe to overtake, then do so, providing you give the horses a wide berth. I'm not sure what your definition of 'very comfortably is! If it's causing a huge tailback, then sometimes as a rider I prefer cars to just overtake, as I anticipate the idiots you mention racing past far too close and fast.

Sadly, there's always some idiot who always puts everyone in danger.

Thank you for being considerate. I don't like being on the roads, but sadly it's necessary in order to get to the bridlepaths.

Spartacus believe me, the last thing most reasonable and responsible horse riders want to do, is ride a horse where it might be scared; it would be dangerous for them, the animal and passers by to do so. But as has been explained many times ad infinitum on this thread, even the most calm and well trained animal can sometimes get in to a flap on occasion. (I happened to see a police horse shy violently in to the road the other day in reaction to an insect I think, and police horses have had some of the best road training in the world!) I therefore don't think it is unreasonable or entitled in those situations to ask passers by (politely and considerately) for a tiny bit of understanding.

Yanbu. It is down to horse owners to get their horses used to all kinds of noises and situations. The world can't just stop because they own a spooky horse. Tie balloons and plastic bags on strings to fences around horses, and supervise them so that they get used to it. Horses need to get used to passing cars, barking dogs and kids. It's up to the horse owners to train them, and get them used to sounds and situations.

I can hang as many bags, balloons, sheets up as i want at the stables, even wrap my 3 horses in tarpaulin etc. It does not mean that they might not take dislike to a bag in a tree or noise from someone behind a hedge when i am out. Luckily my hacking area is surrounded by friendly folk & we all respect each other.

2 of my horses are very well seasoned with competing in large arena's and can cope with everything in a tense atmosphere, but the occasional different coloured leaf will apparently kill them!

1 of mine loads quietly in to the box 9 our of 10 times, the 10th time is a battle of keeping his attention and focus on me before he decides he will go back on.

They are not robots

Oh dear you did not deserve to be snapped at. The person was obviously becoming stressed which wouldn't have helped her horse. I mean this in the best possible way but some of the replies on here have really made me giggle fair cheered me up.

No, they're not robots, they're horses. Horses will act like horses, and it's never the horse's fault. It's not the baby's fault. It's the owner's fault every time.

Popcakes sorry cannot do links from this device but look up British Horse Society website and there is lots of info about safe car and horse interaction on there - also correct procedure is mentioned in Highway Code I think - well it was when I was learning many moons ago!

Thank you so much for staying back and going slow! Good practice for horse riders who are causing a queue to form behind them, is to pull in (where it is safe for them to do so) and gesture traffic on whilst acknowledging the drivers' patience with a wave etc.

Btw, pls be aware that if a rider is riding a young or nervous horse, they might want to wave or establish eye contact to say thank you, but they darent take their hands off the reins just at that moment. They are not necessarily being rude! Although all riders should wave and say thanks when they can of course.