Shouty horse rider!

[SittinginaSleazySnackBar]

We live in quite a rural area, our boundary fence backs onto a large playing field. We have people parking up with horse boxes alongside the boundary fence quite regularly.
I was playing with DD (1) in our garden this morning, she was just pottering in her Wendy house, not making much noise at all just happily babbling and I was talking back to her.
I then hear a woman trying to get her horse into the horse box and the horse is having none of it, stamping its feet and rearing up.
Next thing I can hear a woman telling me to shut my daughter up, shes scaring her horse.
Was I unreasonable in thinking that a horse should be able to cope with a baby babbling especially if she is riding it along country lanes ! I refused to tell DD to be quiet or to go inside as surely we aren't being unreasonable playing in our own garden !
I have no clue about horses so second guessing whether I was rude, plus we are fairly new to the area and everyone knows each other.

I've had to ask someone to put the their umbrella down once. DDS pony absolutely refused to take another step towards it & so i asked very nicely & the man kindly obliged. Pony was only a youngster & had never seen one before that we know of.

Erm.

Actually if your dd WAS making a noise which caused the womans horse to rear up and injure her (not that this happened here)- you may be at fault.

I know it sounds mad but its true I am afraid.

Ditto dogs in people's gardens barking at horses as they go by.

I almost admire her brass neck. Telling you and your DD to be silent in your own garden because she can't handle her horse!

muttrat I don't believe for a second that's true. Have you got a link? I'm sure she would be to blame if she allowed her DD to do something unreasonable like run up to the horse causing it to bolt but there's no way that doing something perfectly legal and reasonable like a baby babbling in it's own garden can lead you to be legally responsible for what a horse does outside that garden.

I am looking for the link!! The dog thing happened to a friend of mine

her dog barked at a horse going past their house, it reared up and the man fell off. His insurance company said that she was at fault, it went to court and she lost!

Tbh if she was having a lot of difficulty its just common courtesy to take your dd away while she loads the horse and goes. But I can see why you wouldn't do it. I probably would have though.

You should've told her to park her horse box somewhere else! Horses get skittish, but her horse is her problem, not yours.

Add message | Report | Message poster Happyandhungry Fri 24-Mar-17 10:47:02
Yuck. Most Horsey people are awful people so definitely YANBU.

Wow. Have you actually met any horsey people?

Also if you are fairly new to a rural area and everyone knows each other then I wouldn't make ANY effort to fall out with anyone tbh!!

Intrigued by the dog barking one.
My parents have a rescue dog who barks at horses. A lot. They don't see that many of them where they live so it's not generally a huge problem, but where I am there are loads so when they come to see me it can get noisy. Telling us to shut her up as a horse goes by is about as effective as telling the owner to stop the horse being scared. Other things she has got better with, in terms of learning not to bark, but because they don't see many (or any really) horses day to day it's something they've been unable to stop. I wonder what the outcome there would have been.

I think asking politely is fine. I went out for a lane hack recently and a young thoroughbred started being silly about someone taking stones in their garden. We asked politely for them to please wait until we got the horses past (having tried to get the horse through his silliness) and then thanked them when they did. 5 minutes later came across someone felling a tree (it was the first sunny day for a while!) and asked him to pause briefly - he did - and again the exchange was all very cheerful.

I suspect the woman was stressed - horse magazines are full of trailer loading advice. That's no excuse for her to be rude but might explain it.

I've had a little yappy dog run out of a garden and chase a horse I was in before. Luckily it was a bombproof horse but that could have been nasty.

It's your garden! YANBU!

What a bloody cheek!

*raking

As a rider myself, I can see that she was taking out her stress at her horse not boxing happily on the nearest target ie your baby. Not nice or helpful, but when you've got a 3/4 ton of horse playing up, it's scary.

She was BU though not to ask politely.

(I had no idea about the legalities of a dog barking in a garden - I've had to train mine to be calm around horses but she's always on a lead when we go to three day events because I can't guarantee she wouldn't do something stupid like chase a galloping horse).

Having read that, I'm more grateful than ever to the lovely horsey ladies who introduced their rock-solid horses to the panicky dog.

They were so calm about it, told me that it was only natural for a dog not to like a ridden horse (two heads! Half-human! Aargh!) even if they'd seen lots of loose horses before, and said they would stop again next time they saw me out with either dog, to get them more used to it. I couldn't believe how quickly one of them got the mutt to take treats from her hand while she was leaning down from the saddle.

Baby, rather than trying to shut the dog up, they told me you should stuff the dog with really good treats, from the second that a horse came into view till it had gone out of sight.

You were making noise in your own garden and she was parked next to your fence... and told you to shut your daughter up?

I'd have told her to fuck off, and when she got there - to fuck off some more.

Bluesrunthegame Yes it is.
Its also possible to train them to overcome most of their fears, including being boxed. They should pass a safety certificate before they are ridden on the road.

www.bhs.org.uk/education/exams-and-qualifications/find-exams/exams/riding-and-road-safety-test

There are numpties out there in ever sport, OP. Horses who don't load are a menace, but she had no right to be rude, or expect you to modify your behaviour in your own garden. I'm sorry she's been rude and ignored your DD too - I always make the effort to stop and let interested children say hi to my horses if it's safe and sensible to do so.

I'm intrigued by the dog barking one too... Seems most unlikely.

The road safety test (I've done it) rather assumes you have a sensible horse though. You need a spooking test (or police horse training) for barky dogs & bin bags pretending to be tigers.

I've never seen a horse in a park!

yes i wondered that. is it really a playing field that they are parking in.

The dog thing was something about the garden not being the same as your house. So a dog 'out of control' inyour garden is counted as being dangerously out of control. Or something. Sorry, it definitely happened, will have to ask friend for more details!

I think if you insist on riding around on a 4-tonne pet you should be able to control it with resorting to yelling at babies/ people with umbrellas and at those with the temerity to walk on the pavement.

I have only ever found horseriders to be lovely and considerate road users, unlike a huge swathe of car-only drivers. Yours sounds like she lost her rag with you but it was really the horsebox's fault!

When I am in my car I slow to a crawl and make sure we have mutual acknowledgement/eye contact before doing anything; and when I am on my bike I will call ahead with a cheerful "good morning!", and slow down or do whatever the horserider needs me to do, to get past each other. Often they will wave me past but I have often stopped entirely for them too, and admire their lovely shiny animals!

That way (esp on a bike) everyone has a much nicer experience all round and we all get along fine.

I think we should all try and get along together, and if that means your scary umbrella is clearly upsetting a child's pony then you should put it down until they've gone by.

Ditto horse riders should be respectful and grateful if people have to make way for them.

TBF, if a horse rider is on a bridleway then cyclists are by law supposed to give way to them. Not sure about pedestrians.