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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think school trip to science museum tomorrow is not a great idea ! After Westminster.

191 replies

OopsDearyMe · 23/03/2017 22:17

My daughters school have a trip arranged for tomorrow to the science museum in London. I know I'm gonna look like a bubble wrapper, but I'm not sure why but I'm not comfortable with the idea of a school taking a group of 100 kids to a known landmark and possible terror target , just a few days after what has just happened.

I know the threat is more likely to be for political places , but look at the bataclan (sp) and beach attacks. I know we should be standing firm and not be cowed, bu my daughter is profoundly deaf on one side and as a result gets lost easily and struggles in busy places. Should something happen even nearby, I'm not sure she would be able to react quickly etc.

I'm also annoyed because the statement sent out, was quite insensitive about what happened and was full of feeble reasons as to why they could not cancel (it would cost them to re book the coaches, the terror threat has not been raised and they have plenty of staff).

I used to work in the West End, when 7/7 happened and still went to work, so I'm no snowflake....

OP posts:
FishOf1 · 23/03/2017 22:40

I'm not sure I agree with all the 'don't let them win' and 'we are not afraid' and 'it won't affect anything we just carry on' things I've seen on social media today.
Where's the shame in admitting yes, we are scared sometimes and yes, it does make us, as normal caring human beings think twice about going to certain places because nobody wants to be hurt or killed.
I feel that in some ways it's almost goading potential terrorists that you can't scare us type mentality.
I am scared. I don't want to die. Terrorists seem to have no fear and aren't afraid to die.

I'd think twice about a school trip definitely but only you can make that choice as where do you draw the line. Seems to be the sad situation that even walking down a street is potentially unsafe not just visiting landmarks

NeverTwerkNaked · 23/03/2017 22:41

I would be feeling nervous in your shoes too, but it's an irrational fear. The risk of a coach accident is far greater. The security is tight anyway and will be extra tight this week. We have to go on living our lives. There are always risks.

Sisinisawa · 23/03/2017 22:42

I was at an event in London today attended by a senior Royal. It's fine, really. The streets are safe.

PurpleDaisies · 23/03/2017 22:45

I feel that in some ways it's almost goading potential terrorists that you can't scare us type mentality.

That's a really really weird way of looking at things.

If everyone reacted to the terrorist attacks by hiding, surely that tells the terrorists how best to operate and if anything would encourage more attacks.

totalturmoil · 23/03/2017 22:47

My 6 year old son was on a school trip to the Tower of London yesterday. Their coach had just driven onto the bridge when it all happened. It's pure luck that the car didn't drive into the bus or that the bus didn't swerve and go over .... anything really. And yet this wouldn't prevent me from allowing any of my children to go again. ANYTHING can happen in any circumstances.

mellicauli · 23/03/2017 22:47

I would say it is probably safer now than at other times as people and police are more alert to danger.

paxillin · 23/03/2017 22:49

8 million of us live here, work here and go to school here.

Today is no more dangerous than any other day. Keep her off if you feel strongly. Today, school trips and tourists were here in London as usual, so most people thankfully didn't cancel.

VanellopeVonSchweetz99 · 23/03/2017 22:52

I would worry more about the coach trip than anything happening at the destination.

Crumbs1 · 23/03/2017 22:52

Do you let her cross the road, cycle or ride in a car. All carry far higher risk of serious injury or death.

wonderlustt · 23/03/2017 22:56

I don't think you are being unreasonable as anyone would be concerned. However to just add another comment in support of the fact London is probably at its safest right now, so don't let that it put you off letting her go. If you are seriously concerned then keep her home, however the chances of harm occurring are extremely minimal

Iwannasnack · 23/03/2017 22:56

I felt anxious the first time I ever left my baby with someone else, vaccinations, 1st day at nursery, school, etc. Parenthood is a lifetime of worry but that's not a reason to not do something that you know is right.

FishOf1 · 23/03/2017 22:57

It just makes me think, if they keep hearing 'you can't scare us/stop is going about our lives' it could make them think they'll just try harder
Like when you argue with someone and the more you ignore what they say the nastier they get iyswim

noblegiraffe · 23/03/2017 23:00

I wouldn't call the Science Museum a landmark. A tourist attraction, sure, but instantly recognisable to the world in the way that the Houses of Parliament are? An obvious target?

If you're going to avoid the Science Museum, you might as well avoid everywhere that people might go. Nothing to say that terror attacks will only happen in the capital either.

Original poster
OopsDearyMe · 23/03/2017 23:01

I was thinking that about the coach, problem is without outing myself, I live in an area where there is already some extremist activity, so I guess she's as much at risk here as anywhere.

Its all very well saying she's as safe tomorrow as she was Monday etc, tell that to the school kids who were hurt. Actually I would feel safer if she were going near the site as I agree its probably the safest place as security will be high.

The school don't allow parent helpers and I wouldn't be able to go anyway as I home school my eldest. Plus I think that would make her worry as it would not be normal.

I guess I will just ave to fret like a wuss for the day !

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 23/03/2017 23:01

What should we do then fish? Now to what they want? Confused

They're trying to terrorise us because they hate our way of life. I absolutely do not think we should change so we might be les likely to be attacked.

Quartz2208 · 23/03/2017 23:04

It's no less safe than it was before the attack and the terror level is unlikely to go down anytime soon, the threat levels have remained pretty constant it's just in the forefront of our mind as it's so new.

The chances of being killed in a terror attack is far less than the coach crashing or being hit by a car or falling down the stairs.

Why should they cancel nothing has really changed

Fwiw I was at the science museum on Sunday and I was in London yesterday and it wasn't like 7/7

Megatherium · 23/03/2017 23:05

Where's the shame in admitting yes, we are scared sometimes and yes, it does make us, as normal caring human beings think twice about going to certain places because nobody wants to be hurt or killed.

The fact that it's highly irrational. You are not at all likely to be hurt to killed in a terrorist attack by going to the Science Museum tomorrow. That's because it looks very much like the act of an isolated individual, because security is high, and because the terrorists know that their chances of achieving what they want just aren't worth trying. It's a truism that we all stand a greater chance of getting hurt just by getting into a car, but we don't think twice about that.

FishOf1 · 23/03/2017 23:05

No, not at all as obviously their idealology is totally at odds with ours. I just feel that it should be ok to say 'yes we are scared' because being scared and fearing for our lives and the lives of those we love shows what sort of people we are
Not necessarily stopping or curtailing our daily lives as an attack could happen anywhere
It's hard to make sense of, a lot of this is just me thinking out loud in a sense

AtHomeDadGlos · 23/03/2017 23:06

Of course you're being unreasonable. What happened was a one off - your child is more likely to be hurt going about her normal life at home than a terrorist attack. Especially one at the Science Museum - hardly a likely place of attack.

GabsAlot · 23/03/2017 23:07

no it doesnt goad them on flash if anything they see how we carry on an support each other

total hope your ds is ok

Original poster
OopsDearyMe · 23/03/2017 23:07

I was thinking more that its next to the Natural History Museum which is a very recognisable attraction for school groups etc.

I get all the gung ho, anything could happen anywhere mantra, but in reality you have to assess the very real dangers in everyday life, otherwise you'd just saend them off to play with barbed wire in a mine field.. With a well they're gonna die sometime ...

Sorry but I don't think its helpful, clearly there is a very real risk, very real people died and these attacks are happening over and again in our major cities. Its something I think you have to be a bit nuts to ignore entirely.

I don't know how respectful it is either to carry on as if nothing happened.

OP posts:
Quartz2208 · 23/03/2017 23:08

The thing is they know that the fear of a terror attack is just as powerful as an actual attack. They can achieve what they want without even trying

PurpleDaisies · 23/03/2017 23:10

I get all the gung ho, anything could happen anywhere mantra, but in reality you have to assess the very real dangers in everyday life, otherwise you'd just saend them off to play with barbed wire in a mine field.. With a well they're gonna die sometime ...

Sorry but I don't think its helpful, clearly there is a very real risk, very real people died and these attacks are happening over and again in our major cities. Its something I think you have to be a bit nuts to ignore entirely

But you aren't accurately assessing the risk that there will fe a terrorist attacked in the science museum in London tomorrow. Confused

What happened was awful but the chances of it happening again while your daughter is there are minuscule.

kateandme · 23/03/2017 23:11

your never rong for your feelings hun.that soooo normal and never apologise for being fearful.not over something like this.but from this its then what you do next.can you overcome your feelings.has things been put in place for you to feel ok.can you fiure that yes its ok to feel scared but should that in this instance simply be allowed to be "your feeling"but she can still go.

AutumnalLeaves38 · 23/03/2017 23:13

total,

God, that really does bring it home. Am so, so glad your precious son wasn't harmed. Admire you very much for maintaining your attitude of not being cowed by terrorists and carrying on as normal, having experienced the scary reality of what can be kept as an abstract by most of us.

OP,

Can well understand your sentiments, and I suppose all any of us can do is weigh up the minuscule chance of it happening to us, personally, vs traffic accident etc.

It's true that security will be at maximum levels, so, theoretically, London is probably the most protected it can be.

When children's safety is in the equation, it affects us all the more deeply: as PPs have asked, how does your DD herself feel about going?

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