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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think there is nothing wrong with this!

92 replies

FedUpAndTiredOfTheWorld · 20/03/2017 18:50

So my friend had a voucher for half price for a high st shop and was planning on buying a item for £30 I was going to buy one for £60. I said to her give me the voucher and I'll give you the money saved back cause might as well make the store pay more. So I gave her £15 she says I should have given her £30 since the voucher was for half the price and that was what I saved. Aibu to have given her £15.

OP posts:

BonnyScotland · 20/03/2017 20:39

my head hurts.. but I agree.. £15 is what she saved and what she received x

SmileEachDay · 20/03/2017 20:40

This is like a GCSE maths problem.

Shouldn't we factor in how fast you walked and what time you both got to the shop?

Dencar · 20/03/2017 20:41

OP "saved" £30 on the £60 item
she spent £30 and ALSO she gave the friend £15
£30 she spent, plus £15 to friend for voucher = £45.00
OP has ”spent" £45, saving herself £15........
This is a 25% discount on the £60 item

Friend only wanted to buy £30 item
Friend is given the £15 by OP
Friend only ends up paying out £15 total

OP pays £45 total, Friend pays £15 total
The voucher SAVED £30.00 combined total because OP used it.

If friend use it, she would have saved £15.00. Total value

Friend still saved the £15.00 she would have got if she used
BUT - by allowing OP to use it, OP also saved £15.00

ArchNotImpudent · 20/03/2017 20:45

OP's friend wouldn't have been able to 'save' £30 without the co-operation of OP, so I don't think it's unreasonable for OP to get some benefit from the deal.

GreenPeppers · 20/03/2017 20:46

No it makes sense.
She got £15 that she would have got anyway.
You got £15 that you wouldn't have got otherwise.

I'm interested to see what the friend though she would be getting? The whole £30, i.e. The full cost of her item?

OverthinkingSpartacus · 20/03/2017 21:07

You asked her for her voucher and told her you'd give her the money saved, which was £30 so I can see why she'd think you were giving her £30. You maybe should have said you'd reimburse her the £15 that she has to pull out if she agreed pay full price herself so that you could pay half for your item.

Tbh. I wouldn't ask a mate to give me her voucher, but if she offered I think give her a little more as a thank you for being kind and offering. Id have given £20, £15 to cover the saving she lost and £5 as a thank you, and I'd still be £10 better off.

If you were planning on spending £60 then any saving is a bonus. If bought more expensive items planning to lay half price without checking and asking if she's happy to give you her voucher it's a bit cheeky

OverthinkingSpartacus · 20/03/2017 21:11

Saying that, I'd be happily offer my friend to use my voucher if her but would have told her before going in to the store so she knew she had a bigger budget to play with.

ArchNotImpudent · 20/03/2017 21:17

In OP's position, I'd probably say "Let me use your voucher, then it will cover the whole cost of your item" and hope my friend said, "Good idea, but let's split the difference" . I wouldn't make an issue of it if she didn't, though.

topcat2014 · 21/03/2017 07:00

This is like one of those questions where someone asks for a lift, and then doesn't offer any petrol money on the basis "you were going there anyway".

There is truth in that, but it could leave the person with the car feeling miffed, although they can't rebut the logic.

Substitute car for voucher and that is what we have.

In economics, I think it is called the "free rider problem".

I would have liked to be the friend, and in a position to offer - that would have given me the warm feeling.

Feeling robbed of my voucher, so someone else made a saving, and I was no better off than my original plan - well that would depend how I felt on the day.

Bluntness100 · 21/03/2017 07:14

financially it makes sense for you to give her fifteen quid, however I think it's the fact you said " give me the voucher I'll give you the money saved", as such she's sssumed she was getting the money you saved as well and you'd still pay full price for your item, as it was her voucher.

She's not come off worse financially and your plan to use it was a sensible one, I think she didn't realise you wished to benefit from the voucher and take this discount too.

rollonthesummer · 21/03/2017 07:23

I'm confused. If your item cost £60 and she had a 1/2 price voucher, why did you only give her £15??

Spikeyball · 21/03/2017 07:30

This has the appearance of you 'taking' the voucher to get something out of it for yourself so I can see why some people may find that annoying.
I would have given her £20.

astormgivenflesh · 21/03/2017 09:36

I really don't get the confusion here at all you both saved £15, that's great! If she used the voucher, she'd have saved £15 but you wouldn't have saved anything. By YOU using the voucher, you BOTH saved the same amount - seems pretty clear to me?!

Why on earth would you give her £30 like some ppl are suggesting? You'd have then paid full price for your item rendering the use of the voucher pointless and she'd have paid nothing for her item!

Surely the best possible outcome is exactly what happened - you both saving the same amount!

irregularegular · 21/03/2017 10:44

It obviously makes a difference whether she also got the £30 item half price as well as you getting the £60 voucher. My understanding was that the voucher was just for one item, so only your £60 item was half price.

If she still got her £30 item half price AND you saved an additional £30, then I think you could reasonably give her anything from 0 to 30, with 15 splitting the difference.

But I'm guessing that wasn't how it was.

Happyfeet1972 · 21/03/2017 11:01

I think you are both BU and agree with witchend. If I've understood correctly you have saved yourself £15 and she is no better off than had she used the voucher herself (as you gave her £15 but she would have saved that using the voucher on her item). In which case if I've understood correctly I think you're very cheeky to ask to use your voucher , she hasn't benefitted from you rather than her using it but you have! I'd be pretty miffed if I was her.

That said I don't agree you should give her £30. A nice thing to do would to give her 20-25 quid or whatever, that way you've saved £5-10 when the voucher isn't yours and she's saved more than had she used the voucher herself..Thinking about it the equitable thing to do (not saying you do this but from a maths point of view) would be to give her £22.50. that way you both are £7.50 better off than had she used the voucher on her item.

Happyfeet1972 · 21/03/2017 11:03

astorm the friend hasn't saved anything though through the new arrangement....She would save £15 if she had used the voucher on her item. Only the OP benefits from this arrangement.

As I say to make it entirely fair I think OP would need to give her friend £22.50 but am willing to be corrected.

clumsyduck · 21/03/2017 11:16

The friends item was 30 quid she'd have got it for 15

By letting op use the voucher op got a 60 quid item for 30 and gives friend the 15 that she would have got if she'd pysically used the voucher. This way they both benefit from the voucher .

Op has done nothing wrong . If she gave friend 30 quid the item would have set her back 60 quid so what would be the point !?

Seems a sensible thing to do doing it in a way we're they both manage a discount and also you know something a friend might do without trying to make a profit !

Happyfeet1972 · 21/03/2017 11:19

Apologies can see Winnie and kind dog have already done the maths.

Those saying that both OP and friend saved £15 each are completely missing the point that the friend was always going to save £15 if she used the voucher as initially intended.

As kind dog says however there's an additional £15 saving by the OP using the voucher not the friend..As it currently stands OP has the entire benefit of the additional £15 and the friend none. Now I agree that's there are different issues being discussed and while it may seem cheap to ask to be reimbursed by the friend given the friend isn't disadvantaged, I think you could also argue that it's cheap to use a friend's voucher to save £15 and not pass that on....As mathematically it should be that they each save £7.50 of the additional £15...Kind dog explains it much better than me.

That said OP your friend is cheeky to expect the whole £30. I suspect this is less about people being cheeky and more about people not knowing how to calculate as proven by this thread.

Pretty shocked how many people can't the mathematical reasoning why £15 is not the correct amount tbh .....Off to name change now

arethereanyleftatall · 21/03/2017 11:22

I would have given her £20.

Because:
Your way, the only person benefitting from the swap of the voucher was you. By giving her an extra £5, you both benefitted.

Sgtmajormummy · 21/03/2017 11:24

SpongeBob got it right in the second post on this thread. She got what she wanted for half price and you got yours for 25% off (£30 to the shop and £15 to your friend for a £60 purchase).

She's still winning percentage-wise.
I'd buy her a drink next time you're out and call it quits.
That's what friends are for!

clumsyduck · 21/03/2017 11:25

But why does there need to be a benefit

For me It would literally be this simple :

Oh I can get my item half price , actually if friend uses voucher and gives me the cash I would have saved I can get my item half price and my friend will also save her self 15 pound off her item. Everyone's a winner . The end

TheresABluebirdOnMyShoulder · 21/03/2017 11:28

She sounds like a shitty friend tbh. She was only ever going to save £15. She had an opportunity to also save you £15, at zero cost to herself, and she is moaning about it? It wasn't exactly an amazing favour that she did you. If she hadn't given you the voucher then she would still only have saved £15. It's not inconvenienced her in the slightest.

All those saying that it was only OP who benefitted from the voucher - well that's not the case because the friend paid £15 for a £30 item. If OP gave her the whole £30 then she wouldn't have benefitted at all would she? Both friends have been able to benefit to the tune of £15. Happy days, surely?

I don't have any friends who I think would be this grabby.

FairytalesAreBullshit · 21/03/2017 11:35

If I understand it right you paid for both items. You're friends so it's a general nice gesture to share such a thing. Why would you make a saving of £30 then give £30 to your friend? She'd have to have a decent reason in my eyes, and it seems rather cheeky of her.

orzal · 21/03/2017 11:35

Did OP pay £15.00 for friend's item and then give friend £15.00 as well .? This means friend has paid nothing for item which was originally £30.00 and OP has paid £60.00 for her item which was £30.00 with voucher but she has also paid £15.00 for friend's item and given friend £15.00 which totals £30.00 for item + £30.00 given to friend.

deadringer · 21/03/2017 11:53

If i have read your op properly you paid 45 and your friend paid 15, which sounds fair. But the problem is that the voucher was your friend's and when you offered to use it to buy a dearer item she assumed that she would save more money, but she only saved the fifteen that she would have anyway. You didn't have a voucher but you managed to save 15 as well, which you weren't 'entitled' too, iykwim and i think she resents that.

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