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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is why many people stay away from gyms?

108 replies

MaryPoppinsPenguins · 14/03/2017 10:12

www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-4309516/Female-bodybuilder-body-shames-woman-gym.html

It's in a very similar vein to the playboy model who body shamed the woman who was showering in an American gym last year, and it's just awful.

My DH and I joined a gym and I used to hate going for fear I would look ridiculous, and I know others feel the same.

I hope she is banned from the gym at the very least.

OP posts:
MusicToMyEars800 · 14/03/2017 10:47

Koala Thank you Smile I am signing up to my local gym at the end of this month, I can go while my dcs are at school as I work evenings.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 14/03/2017 10:50

I suppose she thought she'd have a gaggle of allies laughing along at the poor women as well. Well no her nastiness back fired on her.
She's not a bully. I'll think we'll be the judge of that.
What does the cunt want. The women in picture is trying to lose weight by going to the gym
She can't have it both ways

Joey7t8 · 14/03/2017 10:50

most body builders I know are lovely people who are always willing to lend a hand and encouragement at the gym

This is true. I used to go to a spit and sawdust gym, frequented by lots of huge scary looking blokes. Everyone was really nice, and it was easily the best and friendliest gym I've ever worked out in.

In reality very few people give a shit about what you look like in the gym. It shouldn't be used as an excuse not to go.

problembottom · 14/03/2017 10:51

This makes me so angry but it is definitely the minority so please don't let it put you off going to the gym.

I joined a local gym full of bodybuilding types when I was overweight and I was really wary but I never had a single issue. The instructors and regulars were all massively encouraging (in the beginning I came close to passing out in the classes) and on the gym floor the worst I got was men (always men who did this) trying to correct my technique.

I lost four stone in the end and I was showered with compliments. Gym folk love a transformation, you're a good advert for them!

KoalaDownUnder · 14/03/2017 10:51

Good for you, Music! Do it for yourself. ive been a member of lots of gyms, and I find them so accepting and egalitarian: old, young, fat, slim - nobody cares. We're all only competing with ourselves. Smile 👍

Thefitfatty · 14/03/2017 10:52

Thinking of it, the people I normally hoik my judgey pants up about at the gyms are the ones who are too busy taking selfies to actually work out....Hmm

JaneEyre70 · 14/03/2017 10:53

I'm overweight and my DD has been trying to talk me into going to the gym with her for ages. I've just posted her this link and said that's why. The lady is actively doing something to make herself fitter and healthier but she's publicly and nationally shamed by some vile trout looking plastic who has no morals or conscience. I hope she's removed from that gym and banned from all the others in the area. What a loathsome vile creature. And her back peddalling is worse than pathetic.

Tomorrowisanewday · 14/03/2017 10:54

MusicToMyEars800 - I am that fat girl, and no-one at my gym has been anything but encouraging, really x

RebelandaStunner · 14/03/2017 10:56

Don't let nasty people put you off doing something you may enjoy and benefit from.
That bodybuilder is a very small minority, most people going to the gym are concentrating on their own health/workout not looking to sneer at others.

Thefitfatty · 14/03/2017 10:56

Music I find the best thing about going to a gym regularly is you realize that strength and health come in MANY different shapes and sizes. You shouldn't judge ANYONE at the gym by how they look because you'll most likely end up with your ass handed back to you. Grin

OfaFrenchmind2 · 14/03/2017 10:57

She is a real asshole. But she did what she did because she is a dick, not because she is fit and in a gym. I find that people in the gym, men or women, especially the very fit one, are lovely and great cheerleaders when you start going there.
When you get to know them, a not small number of them started as overweight or very unfit, so they know the struggle of getting to fitness, and empathise and are supportive. That is my experience anyway.

Jux · 14/03/2017 10:57

I love the gym. I love the machines, I love the treadmill. I never go.

One reason is I have the wrong clothes. I wouldn't - under any circumstances - wear gym-type clothes, even if I owned them.

Nor do I have the right shoes. I am less appalled by trainer, and am looking out for a cheap pair.

The shoes are the thing our local gym won't budge on. I can wear my clothes there but not my shoes.

When I find a cheap pair of trainers I shall start going again.

I don't give a shit what people think about me there, my massive fatness wobbling about and my strange clothes.

Oh and they seem to think it's weird to read when on the treadmill.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 14/03/2017 10:58

i hope she gets trolled to fuck for this, you know the really nasty hatey death threaty ones- they have their use!

unleash the trolls please!

VestalVirgin · 14/03/2017 10:58

I think a barely literate woman who looks like a drag queen is on very shaky ground when it comes to criticising other people!

With the way news are reported in the UK recently, I wouldn't even be too sure she's actually a woman. Confused

Not saying that actual women don't bodyshame, but since you mention she looks like a drag queen ... I am crap at spotting males in womanface, and since the newspapers apparently aren't allowed to tell us ... Hmm

TedEriksen · 14/03/2017 11:00

Hateful, bullying behaviour. I go to a gym in a small town - I'm usually in my own little world so can't claim to be too sociable there, but most other people are very helpful and nice to everyone (also, the staff would chuck out anyone they saw taking pictures).

Deathraystare · 14/03/2017 11:00

think a barely literate woman who looks like a drag queen is on very shaky ground when it comes to criticising other people!

I agree. She has a face like a duck!

highinthesky · 14/03/2017 11:00

Wtf is wrong with people? Photography should be banned from gyms.

MaryMorpho · 14/03/2017 11:04

I love my gym - it took some courage to go and do weights at first because of worrying about exactly this - but no such problems. It's full of every shape, size and age and as a very non-buff pear-shaped 40-something I'm probably typical. Even the fittest and most perfect-looking types there are kind and friendly, I have never felt uncomfortable at all. So it can happen.

FlyingElbows · 14/03/2017 11:06

Vestal when I said "drag queen" I really just meant the style of make up, nothing else. Who knows maybe she does have a big swinging dick to clobber everyone with though!!

I feel a teeny bit sorry for her cause she'll be getting abuse back at her a millionfold. Only a teeny bit though Wink.

PanGalaticGargleBlaster · 14/03/2017 11:08

I am a freelance contractor so tend to move around with work quite a bit so I have been a member of dozens of gyms and to be honest from my observations nobody gives a shit what size you are as they are too busy getting on with their own exercise routine. Not everyone down your average local gym is some toned cover model or some massive body builder, mostly its average looking people trying to do their 3x a week workout. If I do see someone down the gym who is seriously out of shape my first thought is 'fair fucks to you, you are doing something about it', not mocking or staring. If instructors are not on hand to dispense advice you have to be very unlucky to find someone unwilling to help you.

ArcheryAnnie · 14/03/2017 11:08

"I would never do this. It's not who I am."

I'm baffled by non-apologies like this. I mean, we all saw that she did do this. Saying "I would never do this" is just gaslighting bullshit.

Rachel0Greep · 14/03/2017 11:12

Please please don't let this put ANYONE off joining or going to a gym. I'm a recent joiner, not in the first flush of youth, and I absolutely love it.

I will be honest and say I don't even notice others. This is MY journey to fitness, and it's helping me in so many ways.

Someone who would do a thing like that obviously has lots of issues of their own. Nobody, in my opinion, should ever feel the need to put others down in order to feel good themselves.

GeekGoddess · 14/03/2017 11:13

What a cow. And the failed attempt at back tracking is beyond pathetic.

It's sad that stuff like this puts people off. I believe those of you saying that the vast majority of people are kind and encouraging, but the individual cowbags seem to have a disproportionate effect on confidence Sad Hopefully this woman being smacked down will help reverse that a bit.

I would quite like to join a gym but don't have the confidence. I am fairly slim and (aside from the lack of beautifully sculpted muscles) would more or less fit in. However, in my head this makes it worse as my complete lack of strength or fitness and beetroot face at more than light exercise would seem even more notable and out of place! I know it's not logical! But people really should think about how much their actions can affect people's lives.

ItShouldHaveBeenJingleJess · 14/03/2017 11:13

I think she deserves empathy, rather than malice. A happy person doesn't set out to hurt others - therefore she's clearly not happy.

TheWitTank · 14/03/2017 11:13

You will actually often find that the fittest athletes fully appreciate the struggle and hard work it takes to get fit and stay fit and are therefore the most supportive and least judgmental. Never look at somebody and think "they must think I look awful". I bet you they won't be.