To think SiL takes Facebook 'likes' too much to heart?

[FirstOfHerName]

SiL is very glamorous – think Footballer’s Wives levels of maintenance. She also loves the high life and expensive brand name stuff and she and DB1 are always flying business class or out at fancy restaurants or hotels. They constantly post photos of themselves partaking in these activities on Facebook, and SiL posts dozens of glam selfies per week. All fine in itself if that’s what you want to do.

However, if I or any member of my family don’t happen to click Like or make a comment on her photo saying how fabulous she looks, DB1 rings us and tells us off! My DM has got several bollockings from him for not doing this – apparently SiL was in tears last time, as none of us had Liked her last selfie. He even told my DM exactly what to say when making a comment on this! It’s actually really upsetting my DM but whenever I or DB2 try to talk to DB1 about it he gets shitty with us.

AIBU to think this is all a bit batshit?

(And no, I'm not going to delete my Facebook account just because of this!)

I'd actually laugh if someone told me off for that. I've sometimes said with a jokey sad face to my partner that we're not popular if somethings not got a lot of likes (i only post a few times a year and DF never posts) but i'd be absolutely mortified if he rang my friends to tell them off! I wonder if she even knows he does that.

Do you know her family? Can they shed any light on her behaviour or would they be better placed to gently intervene?

Sadly they are equally batshit - very wealthy and image obsessed and practically disowned her older brother for "only" becoming a teacher and marrying a "very plain" woman.

So I have no doubt that her issues stem from them, but my brother enables her. He wasn't like this before he met her either!

They sound like a bunch of utter fucking dicks OP!

They are being preposterous. Taking her out of the equation (because she's being too silly to do anything but ignore) your brother is being the real knob of the piece, creating on her behalf.

I could well imagine my bil (dh's brother) being the same...he is very self important about his marriage and his wife...we are all supposed to be fascinated by her. It's nothing to do with how much he loves her, it's to do with the fact that he expects a standing ovation for everything he does, including getting married.

She sent me an utterly bonkers message accusing me of brainwashing the family against her...but I have never discussed her with any of them. I replied in the negative and expressed baffled surprise about it. They both responded by blocking me.

I just leave them to it. Pair of twats.

Just another view point- what would happen if you "liked" all her photos?

In the grand scheme of things if

• makes someone happy
• stops you and your bro hasseling you
• no skin of your nose

I'd just do it. I'm for an easy life and trivial stuff like this wouldn't bother me. It's her with the problem not you. I'd just start liking every single one and hopefully that will be the end of the drama.

Bizarre. It's sad how she measures her self worth by the amount of attention she gets and needs constant validation. I had a friend once who constantly complained that men only saw her as a sexual object, whilst posting her 14th ass selfie of a day. I d just leave them to it .

I'd just do it. I'm for an easy life and trivial stuff like this wouldn't bother me. It's her with the problem not you. I'd just start liking every single one and hopefully that will be the end of the drama.

I can see where you're coming from, but you're going to miss one of their posts at some point and they'll get really offended. Also, why the hell should you let someone manipulate you in that way?

I may not be a very nice person but I would refrain from liking anything of hers in future, on principle.

Just say 'oh we didn't see it, sounds super!' Maybe unfollow them on FB so that you can say it truthfully.

It sounds excruciating but it sounds like she maybe has a few issues, so go easy.

Who drives the behaviour? Is it your DB or SIL? Just wondering as he seems to be demanding the reaction. Has SIL ever said anything herself or been upset when you were around?

If I were feeling nice, I'd suggest to my brother that his wife's reaction to other people having a life her photographs not being 'liked' was abnormal, and rather that put a sticking plaster over the issue by insisting everyone panders to this, if he loved his wife he'd be trying to get to the bottom of her insecurity and helping her with that. I'd probably round it off with a 'fuck off while you're at it'.

If I were not feeling nice, I'd go straight to the 'fuck off'.

NotAMammy I'm sure I've made it sound far more intriguing than it is.

I'm well known in my field and people like to think they know me and my life.

I think next time he rings I'd recommend a good therapist for both of them. He really is out of order upsetting you mum and I would tell him that. I have a friend who constantly posts Share if you love your daughter, well I have a daughter and we are fb friends so I felt obliged to always share it and then she always "likes" it. Eventually we were chatting about it and my daughter said she only likes it as she also feels obliged. So I said to her "shall we take it as read that I love you unconditionally and leave it at that". So that's what we did. I don't really get why people post "selfies" as I think it's really vain but that could also be because I am quite old (59).

Ugh, the "share if you love your hubby" memes! I always want to say I'm not sharing as mine's a complete cunt...

Christ I couldn't humour that level of shite

FirstofherName

He's your brother, just tell him to shut up.