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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Sleeping in living room so my children have a room each

90 replies

4267sparkles · 03/03/2017 06:56

I have 2 children boy age 9 (10 in may and a girl age 7. We live in a private rented 2 bed house where the kids share the larger double room. They have bunk beds and there chest of drawers,couple of shelving units with there toys etc on..its a decent size room for them to share at this age. However I want to move to an area where the kids will be in the catchment for the high school they are to go to but the rent for 3 bed houses in that area are out of my budget,its just me and the kids at home.
I went to view a house last night in the area I want to be in but the house,(well bedrooms) is smaller than we are currently in.
AIBU to consider moving so the kids can go to the high school we want and for me to give up a bedroom to be able to give them there own room? They could share but it would be a bit of a push and in the next couple of years they will want there own space.

Another point that I considered is that I have shared custody with my ex so I have the kids 3 nights mid week and alternate weekends. When they are with there dad I could sleep in my daughters bed...or would that not be right?

I just want to see if anyone else has been in this situation

OP posts:

Livelovebehappy · 04/03/2017 10:39

I did this in my first rented house after splitting with my dh. My thinking was that the Dc spent more time in their bedrooms, with friends, homework and hanging out, whilst I only would use it for sleeping. My DCs were similar ages to yours, and I too slept in my DS bed on the weekend when she was with her DF. We had a basement for storage and I had a canvas wardrobe down there to store my clothes. Not ideal, but it worked. You could live in the rented place until your DCs actually secure a place at the school, then find something bigger further away, and they could then catch public transport to get to school, so it could be looked on as a temporary situation to be in.

bibbetybobbetybooo · 04/03/2017 19:52

It sounds doable and sensible to me. I'd get a wall bed if you're allowed to have one. Much more comfy

mizu · 05/03/2017 09:25

We've thought about this. Two girls though so not essential.

Now in 2 bed flat in catchment and just got 2nd DD in school.

We are now looking to buy our 1st (and only) property in the next year but prices around here are insane. There is no way we'll be able to buy a 3 bed. Girls can share, having your own room is a luxury in my eyes, lovely but def not essential.

JLong1980 · 01/12/2018 17:29

Thanks for this. I recently moved into a 3 bedroom 1 bath and I have 2 teenage girls, 1 teenage son and an 8 month old grandson—- so I decided to give my Dad my bed, buy a sleeper sofa, put my bedroom armoire in my new living room and hang my clothes in the jacket closet and give each of my kids their own room. My grandson is staying in my oldest daughters room, of course, but I just wouldn’t feel right having a room to myself and making my daughters share or making my son take the living room. No way! You’re a great mom. And you can always turn your living room or dining room into a bedroom and just use curtains to block it off. That’s my next move. I’m gonna block off the living room and make it my bedroom and since my driveway leads to my side door—- everyone can just use that door to enter my home and go through the kitchen and dining room to the hallway and on to the rest of the house without stepping foot in my room. Everybody has to use what they have and make the best of it. You’re not alone. Bravo Mom!

AwkwardPaws27 · 01/12/2018 18:05

I shared with my brother until I moved out at 17. We couldn't afford a bigger place. We had the bigger bedroom, and put our wardrobes side by side in the middle of the room, facing opposite directions - this created a "wall" of sorts so we had separate areas. The ceiling light was on my side but the wardrobes didn't reach the ceiling so my brother got some of the ceiling light + we each had a lamp. The room had two windows so we each had a window.

hazell42 · 01/12/2018 18:08

I have been sleeping in the living room for the last 4 months when my adult son came home after a relationship break up. Lots of reasons why it was better for him to have the room.
BUT I knew it would be only temporary and he is moving out in 2 weeks.
It's been fine, but the problems I have found is that:
When the first person in the house gets up, I have to get up
I cant go to bed until the last person in the house does
If someone gets up in the night it wakes me up
I have to be very vigilant if I want to prevent my living room looking like a bedroom. I made sure I had a chest of drawers for my clothes and cupboard for my odds and ends to tidy everything away.
If you are happy with with all of that, then you are the person best placed to decide what is best for your family.

kleemanning · 22/10/2019 21:35

I have a small 2 bed house and currently my 13 year old son is having to share with my 2 year old son . he's going to be going into a bed soon and my eldest always wants his x box on . really thinking of doing this but my own space is so important to my mental health I'm struggling to decide what to do . does anyone here have same sex and big age gap?and if so how do you manage this?

IceCreamAndCandyfloss · 22/10/2019 21:38

I’d do this if it were the only way I could live in catchment for a school I wanted. They need their own rooms given their ages, both need privacy.

Dieu · 22/10/2019 21:43

If I've understood correctly, you have the children 3 nights per week, and every other weekend. I think it's definitely manageable to sleep on the sofa for that time.

SapatSea · 22/10/2019 22:05

You could give your Ds the smallest room and then share the larger room with your DD assuming there is enough room for 2 single beds. You coud decamp downstairs if she has a friend for a sleepover. A cheap folding screen would create a barrier around your bed. Your DD is still young.

ViciousJackdaw · 22/10/2019 22:26

That's very selfless of you but I would consider a couple of things. As PP have already said, you might not get into the school. What would you do then? Also, there will be a point where you meet someone. How would you manage that?
I'd advise having a plan B for the present and also a long term plan so in the next few years, all three of you can have your own room.

mumwon · 22/10/2019 22:38

would it be feasible to have an eat in kitchen - so if you want to go to bed early (as they grow up a bit) the dc can entertain/stay up a bit there?
& have a small tv there?

BlackeyedGruesome · 23/10/2019 00:08

thank fuck for that... that is wha t I do . I find putting the sofa cushions onthe floor is more comfortable thatn the sofa bed which has a crap mattress. I use a cot mattress on the sofa to sit on.

the living room is bedroom, living room, play room, office and dining room.

Hollyhobbi · 23/10/2019 00:40

Not that long ago people were in 2 up 2 down houses with 10 or 12 children or more!

JamieVardysHavingAParty · 23/10/2019 00:54

Zombie Thread

OP asked this in March 2017.

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