To think missing a portion of a lesson is not an appropriate sanction?

[MsGameandWatch]

Even if it's a favourite lesson, it's still a lesson, it's on the NC, it's part of their education. I don't think it should be used as a sanction punishment.

Thanks all, I really don't want to share too many details but my child was not defiant, she just intensely believed that she was in the right and as such could not apologise. Knowing the details I can understand why. I've spoken to two teacher friends in RL and both said this is not something they would ever do certainly not in the situation described. But as usual MN is a different world 😉

That's the other problem. It sets up a hierarchy of subjects that non-"core" teachers have to fight against already (and I say that as an English teacher).

Maths is too important to miss but it's ok to miss art or PE. Ok well I'll just bunk art next week then.

It's difficult to be definitive without more detail as to what happened between the two. Sometimes apologising isn't about being right or wrong, it's about sucking it up and making the whole situation better.

You've obviously made your mind up OP, so not sure why you're asking the "other world" that is MN. Especially when you won't give the details that make it "clear" and given how often primary children fall out, hardly identifying

Trifle was just trying to establish what happened, I think...why so chippy, OP?

That's kind of my point in posting blue, which is why I won't give away information that would make us recognisable. It's not really about that and whether she earned that punishment or not, it's about whether it's appropriate to miss lessons for minor infractions and how the various subjects are valued. There's more to this obviously and many parents have observed things like drama, art, PE taking more and more of a backseat.

OP I would usually just agree with a friend in this kind of situation too. It is not worth losing a friendship over, so I would not pay too much attention to what your friends said.

I don't think though the teacher could just ignore that your DD refused to apologise. The teacher had to take some kind of action.

I don't think I was being tbh. Just know some posters of old and feel a certain amount of futility in engaging with them.

What punishment do you think the teacher should have given?

Missed a portion of break brasty. This is the usual punishment for the boys. Though personally I don't think she should have been punished at all given her exemplary behaviour and record and other information that I honestly can't share as it's personal.

Then talk to the school about how you don't agree that missing lessons should be a punishment. But missing breaks is fair enough. It is immaterial that it is your DDs favourite lesson.

No it isn't, again for reasons I can't go into here. I understand it's frustrating to not get all the details but that's just how it is.

As I said this was more about the valuing of various subjects anyway. I've read all the posts and I don't think it's appropriate to punish by missing lessons. They're either important enough to b PE on the curriculum or they're not surely? Of course this does not apply to situations described where disruption is preventing the lesson from progressing.

Yes I agree with you. I disagree though that it was fine for your daughter not to apologise. Sometimes we just have to swallow and do this.

I agree, OP. No lessons should be missed as a punishment, only breaks or Golden Time.

I think there is probably a whole other story to this and there is probably a distraught child in another house just now.

Your response to Trifle was uncalled for and way off the mark. I think you are reacting in the way that you are because you don't like what she has to say.

You say your DD shouldn't be punished due to her exemplary record but that is nonsense. The other girl may well have thought they were in the right but they had the manners to apologise. Your DD didn't.

And with regards to your other teacher friends, of course they are going to tell you want you want to hear!

In answer to your OP, yes, it can be appropriate to miss portions of lessons as sanctions . Education is a right but with that, comes responsibilities and too many children and prarents these days (shockingly more and more even in Primary school) see the rights but shirk the responsibilities.

Yabu to say she shouldn't be punished at all

Sometimes you just have to suck it up and apologise that someone's feelings were hurt regardless of rights or wrongs.

I agree that missing playtime or golden time would be more appropriate but I think you'd still be complaining anyway

OP

Everyone: We need more info but from your OP, YABU

OP:

Everyone: YABU

OP: No I'm not, but I can't say why because they might be identifying so I'm ignoring you all as you don't know the full story.

Some of those posts have made me laugh. I absolutely refuse to tell what happened because it's personal and I would only be accused of drip feeding anyway but i do feel that those of you making stuff up and slagging my daughter off would feel rather ashamed if you knew the full story. Wh don't people ever give anyone the benefit of the doubt on here? Always straight to the nasty assumptions. It may be of interest to you that in five years of attendance at that school I have never once complained about the actions of a teacher, always respected their position as being in loco parentis.

I will bow out now. I know MN too well to get sucked into the over sharing just to prove myself. I don't need to do that, certainly not on this occasion 😊

Oh and to be quite clear, I didn't ask whether my daughter deserved to be punished, I asked if that kind of punishment - missing lessons, was suitable, so I reserve the right to be as "vague" as I like, given that what she did is only relevant in whether something disruptive took place in the classroom, which it did not. So thanks for all those opinions on a question I didn't even ask 😊

What a very odd thread.

You stated that you didn't think your daughter deserved to be punished based on her record, so it's fair enough for posters to disagree with that. Having an "exemplary record," doesn't give you carte blanche to misbehave, even if it's only once. Also, sometimes in life you have to apologize even when you weren't in the wrong. It's just a thing you have to do.

Personally, I would have made her miss her next break time if I were the teacher. But I'm not the teacher, and I don't know what her motivation was for making your daughter miss part of a lesson. Was something special happening in the lesson, and that was the punishment, to miss the special thing?

Nobody has slagged off your daughter ffs! Plenty have said she should have apologised, that's all.

Definitely unfair on trifle . She was just trying to figure out/ suggest what happened.

Teachers are limited in their sanctions better than a detention like they would have had in secondary or a day in removal which is sitting in a cubicle in isolation.

Why post if you can't give enough information for anyone to decide if you are or aren't being reasonable?

Definitely unfair on trifle . She was just trying to figure out/ suggest what happened.

^ this.