There's always one who thinks their wants overrides everyone else

[FairfaxAikman]

Sick of drivers bumping their cars up onto our garden, over new year I installed big fuck off rocks and painted them white.
Apparently this is not a big enough clue that it's private property and CorsaCunt has chucked them about to do what suits HIM, leaving a sodding great hole in the grass where the rock used to sit.
Sadly I had to leave for work otherwise I would have been staking the car out to confront the tosser.
Absolutely livid!

Cornet? That would have been no problem. CONCRETE.

Kind of a sunken wall that you can't see from the house I think

If the property is jointly owned and you all pay for upkeep could you agree a small chain link fence. If you all agree then who's to complain if a fence is there. Ok there are 'regulations' to say no fences but what's the worse that can happen? Someone says take it down. Not exactly serious.

Alternatively steel posts driven into the ground, painted white and a sign saying no parking. Private land

Diagram is a work of art btw

I love a parking thread with a diagram

Corsacunt needs to be taught a lesson, put the rock back where it was, it doesn't matter if the car is in the way

Have to compliment you on your use of excellent diagrams and photos.
other people complaining about their parking issues are just so bloody lazy!

Queen 100 properties, the majority of which are rental properties. Sadly I know from experience that the landlords won't agree to anything which will cost them money.

The back of his car wouldn't need to be levered up that much to be able to insert the rock back underneath it, would it?

Could you put a flowerbed there? Or plant a few shrubs?

How about a scarecrow?

Rocks quite clearly indicate that the presence of your vehicle on the grass is unwelcome regardless of ownership.

Saying that, I have an awkward shared drive with a 90 degree bend. It can be possible that to reverse out of a parking position to the turning circle that it's necessary to turn at 270 degrees in a narrow drive. The neighbours whose property it bounds on to, but don't use the drive lined it with rocks. If a van accesses our properties, their wheel base is too long to stay on the tarmac on the bend and they have to shift the rocks or risk them gouging into the mud. (Crap layout by the developers. Cheers.) After a few such incidents, the rocks were shifted in a couple of feet so that they ceased to be an obstruction to passage on and off the drive.

However, shifting the rocks to park your car in a twatty fashion where there isn't space is quite clearly unreasonable.

I don't know why people are even TRYING to defend CorsaCunt.

It's obvious that you aren't supposed to reverse half of your car onto a grass verge.

It's obvious that the rocks are supposed to prevent people trying to park on the verge.

CorsaCunt (and of course it's a man, regardless of the physical strength required to shift a bloody great rock) is being a Grade A cunt.

Got to agree that concreting the rocks in would be a better option. Although I did also consider suggesting covering the rocks in dogshit, until I saw someone else had already done that!

well I'm sure not defending corsacunt, but am peed off that the op automatically refers to them as a HIM, if she's said HER this thread would be up in arms, but because it says HIM then thats game for the course to pile in.....

of course if the op knows it's a man cos she seen him, then why the hell didn't she say to him you can't park there??

Ssd I've seen the vehicle owner on pervious occasions, I just didn't see him park like this.

fair enough

can you leave a note on his windscreen then, or let his tyre down

Not marking a place at all ...

I would put loads of nails in the grass and hope that his tyres were punctured or slash his tyres, to make sure

lovely diagram.

I have got an image now. OP is standing next to the corsa, steam rising from her ears, while a Maggie Smith-in -full -flow voice intones

" We are going to need considerably bigger rocks....."

Put rock on car roof. Penguin bollards.

I've laughed a lot at "angrier fuckier rocks".

CrossCunt is taking the piss totally.

It's not outrageous to assume that whoever moved the rock is a man. I would find that hard to lift and I am quite strong for a woman.

Top class diagram! I cannot even fathom the thinking pattern that leads to moving a rock in order to park like that!

It doesnt look like private property but it doesnt look like a parking space either seeing as its up a kerb & on to grass #parkingcunt

I'd say letting a tyre down every time

we did that once, similar situation, we were getting really pissed off and the driver couldn't have cared less, well he sure cared the morning he tried to set off for work and found his rear tyre was flatter than a pancake...he never parks near us now..

You need bigger rocks!

My brother is a farmer and there's a cattle grid as you come onto the farm with fences running up to it either side, immediately followed by a right-hand bend with a massive turning area in front of it, so that tractors and trailers, milk tankers etc can make the turn with no problem at all - DP delivers cow cake to the farm in a huge rigid wagon and confirms that it's not a difficult turn to make. However, my brother got so sick of bad delivery drivers knocking down the fence on one side of the cattle grid (thus letting next door's sheep in) due to not taking the turn wide enough on their way out that he concreted a massive boulder in front of it. He hasn't had to repair the fence since then. :)