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Original poster

Strangest phone call from school

158 replies

Dorisswept · 25/02/2017 09:24

It is the last weekend of half term here and I have just received a phone call from the headmaster of ds(17) school that 2 members of staff have been suspended pending investigation, after members of the public reported comments they allegedly made concerning ds
.no more detail than that.I don't know what to think.do I tell Dc? The last thing he needs is this with his a level exams coming up. I cannot begin to imagine what kind of comment ,who made it, who reported it, and how given it is half term?

OP posts:
OurBlanche · 25/02/2017 12:24

He is 17.

2 teachers have been suspended,.

Someone outside school has reported it.

What is to be gained by not telling him? It is 'out there' and, if he arrives at school without a clue then he is going to feel a tad silly, upset, betrayed!

But mainly, he is 17 and the school will choose to have most contact with him, it is probably only because of the timing that they haven't already spoken to him directly.

UnGoogleable · 25/02/2017 12:29

You can guarantee that your DS will hear about it pretty quickly, so you really ought to tell him. He may even know himself what it was about, so you can talk about it together.

I see absolutely no reason for the secrecy here - he's 17, he's not a child. He will find out, so talk to him, deal with it together.

ohtheholidays · 25/02/2017 12:30

If you know which members of staff it was and you think it may be on FB I'd be looking on there.

BurningBridges · 25/02/2017 12:31

Ring Head back, tell him you expect to see him at 9am on Monday. Can't tell you more my arse. And I would tell DS he'll be hurt if he finds out you kept it from him.

KateAdiesEarrings · 25/02/2017 12:34

Asking the school how they plan to support him is not an overreaction. They may say he doesn't need support but until OP asks she won't know.

Rockingaround · 25/02/2017 12:37

How strange, what was the point in telling you, there's no context and that's what you need. I would just be at the school at 8.30 on Monday morning, I would mention ofsted involvement if you're not satisfied. My main worry now though would be if DS is ok, and I would definitely just tell my son what the head said and let him tell me the rest, why wouldn't you? I'd be worried why he hadn't mentioned whatever has happened to me, he may feel much better having whatever it is out in the open, what if he's stressing out and worried himself?

OurBlanche · 25/02/2017 12:45

Asking the school how they plan to support him is not an overreaction. They may say he doesn't need support but until OP asks she won't know. He is 17. School will not be able to tell OP much at all!

If her DS takes up any counselling sessions they cannot tell her.

Other support would be provided by other members of the tutor/safeguarding team and that too carries confidentiality.

OP could be told that he is being supported but not the details of ^how".

OurBlanche · 25/02/2017 12:45

I see absolutely no reason for the secrecy here - he's 17, he's not a child. Because 2 members of staff are under investigation... the 'secrecy' is to protect them, as well!

Fighterofthenightman · 25/02/2017 12:54

I think this will turn out to be a very minor incident so try not to worry too much.

pieceofpurplesky · 25/02/2017 13:05

I would talk to you DS. I am a teacher and if it is on social media everyone will know about it - likelihood is that the member of the public that complained is a parent ....

WhisperedLoudest · 25/02/2017 13:06

ourblanche you're being ridiculously naive to suggest that this is about safeguarding.

Safeguarding does not extend to protecting teachers in circumstances where they have been suspended, it is a defined term under the Children's Act of which the overarching premise is protection of children.

It may be that teachers have the right to privacy/confidentiality or that the school don't want to prejudice an investigation but that is not safeguarding and their "rights"need to be balanced against genuine safeguarding of the child (which a 17 year old is for these purposes).

Not telling the parent/child smacks of arse covering

OurBlanche · 25/02/2017 13:16

Whispered I would love to be naive about safeguarding, but having spent countless hours undergoing the training, being a departmental 'named person' and having dealt with all sorts of issues, I think I know what it is. It is an umbrella term that covers a lot!

As I said a few pages ago, the confidentiality aspect is there to protect both sides.

OP has absolutely no right to know any details. Suspension is automatic after such an allegation.

If you want the automatic response to be "School is lying, covering something up" then go for it. But, as someone with experiences of such stuff, I would say, as another poster who is also a HT has said, the current scenarios says that the Head in this case is trying, is not hiding anything!

But if you prefer the more paranoid, conspiracy riddled version of life go for it! I shall remain 'naive' and happier!

Mabelface · 25/02/2017 13:21

I'd talk to your nearly adult DS. Chances are that he already knows what it's about.

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 25/02/2017 13:22

From an employment perspective they have a legal obligation to conduct an investigation without prejudice. That can and will require confidentiality.

It's a balancing act for sure but the op does need to ask the questions that relate to her child because that is her priority and interest.

Op your plan to find out the facts first seems very sensible. Good luck Flowers

I do think some of the posters on this thread are treating supposition as fact and have let their imaginations get the better of them.

maybeshesawomble · 25/02/2017 13:24

I would speak to him. If it is regarding social media I expect he already knows.

SilverBirchWithout · 25/02/2017 13:26

Everybody is assuming it is something 'negative' that the teachers said. However it's just as likely something slightly inappropriate such as 'what a hunk' or even 'wish I was a bit younger...' said between the 2 teachers.

Probably more likely given the report by a concerned member of the public and the immediate suspension. An inappropriate comment with possible sexual overtones is much more likely to have generated this swift response.

MrsGuyOfGisbo · 25/02/2017 13:26

you're being ridiculously naive to suggest that this is about safeguarding. Safeguarding does not extend to protecting teachers in circumstances where they have been suspended
precisely - people holler the 'safeguarding' mantra to save them any effort in responding correctly.

OurBlanche · 25/02/2017 13:28

people holler the 'safeguarding' mantra to save them any effort in responding correctly. Total bollocks!

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 25/02/2017 13:30

Yes some people use safeguarding as an excuse to be difficult or jobsworths (see also Heath & Safety) but I can't see that here.

WhisperedLoudest · 25/02/2017 13:31

mrsguy falls into same category of people who quote "data protection" without any understanding of what the legislation actually says

WhisperedLoudest · 25/02/2017 13:32

movingon can you explain then how safeguarding applies here? I don't believe it does but always interested in different interpretations of the framework.

OurBlanche · 25/02/2017 13:34

Grin I may have met her, or her twin, out here in Real Life!

I have just spent a few hours checking that I don't need to be registered with the ICO. Logic told I do not, the association I belong to say I don't, the list on ICO says I don't, but still she carried on blocking my work until I had registered. I declined the work in the end, much to her surprise Smile

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 25/02/2017 13:35

Probably not as well as others can and have done so already. I can explain more about the employer's obligations to conduct a without prejudice investigation and why suspension would be appropriate if that helps? That's my field of expertise :)

Obviously I can't comment on the specifics of this case because nobody knows them. Hence point of thread.

GeorgeTheHamster · 25/02/2017 13:37

I have been told by school that safeguarding no longer applies to seventeen year olds - the context being that they feel it is ok for my DS to share a hotel room with his FTM trans friend on a trip. Both students consent. But they'd never let him share with one of the girls (which this student biologically is).

OurBlanche · 25/02/2017 13:40

I have been told by school that safeguarding no longer applies to seventeen year olds That is not true! Given that I spent a couple of decades in FE teaching 16+ I can tell you that this is not right.

However... the scenario you put forward is a really tricky one. I have no experience of it, so can't help with that! But I know that sex segregation in dorms isn't always possible on some field trips... so they are treated as adults, not sex fiends!