Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

Ungrateful child

86 replies

bridgetjonesmassivepants · 23/02/2017 10:58

Daughter is at a dance workshop so said that younger son and I could go and see the new Batman film. Son excited, booked tickets for today.

When it came to getting near to leaving the house son starts moaning and saying that he can't be bothered and wants to stay at home. (He's 8)

I get really cross, walk away to calm down and come back and say he is being ungrateful that lots of kids would love to have a treat like this and that we are no longer going and that he is to leave me alone for the next three hours.

Backstory is that he never wants to leave the house and is always whining when we leave it - it's like being under house arrest. I just thought it would be nice to do something fun together as we have been in the house a bit and daughter is having a treat at the workshop.

AIBU in not dragging him to the cinema?
Now passively aggressively hovering the house instead...

OP posts:

VeryBitchyRestingFace · 23/02/2017 11:37

Presumably you've banned him from lego/Youtube for the duration of today?

I was a real mummy's girl and my mum telling me I couldn't speak to her for 3 hours would have been a devastating punishment.

HermioneJeanGranger · 23/02/2017 11:37

I think with kids, unless absolutely necessary, it's generally best not to pay out money in advance.

But once you'd bought the tickets, no way would I have been staying at home!

dementedpixie · 23/02/2017 11:40

If the tickets were bought then we would still be going whether they wanted to or not!

Carollocking · 23/02/2017 11:41

You must be giving too much pocket money if will only take 2 weeks to get it back

Yokohamajojo · 23/02/2017 11:43

My DS7 is like this, he always have to have a moan when leaving the house even if it's doing something he loves, like going to the cinema or McDonalds. Once out of the house he's fine, for him it is that he gets engrossed in whatever he's doing and can't seem to think of the nice thing he is about to do. Tell him if you stay at home he is definitely not playing on any electronic device but he can help with laundry, clean his room etc

leghoul · 23/02/2017 11:43

My son is like this. It's very annoying. However when he DOES go, he loves it. I think with him he has such a busy week he just really likes mooching around at home not having to do anything, so forgets that if he does that he will miss out on fun things. He also has a touch of anxiety (parties etc particularly bring this on)

Original poster

bridgetjonesmassivepants · 23/02/2017 11:43

£3.50 a week. Thought as he was eight I wouldn't make him pay for my ticket too, just his own.

OP posts:

leghoul · 23/02/2017 11:44

Yes he definitely gets engrossed in things - I've found it's easier to get him out without complaints if we go early in the morning before he has a chance to do other things at home.

leghoul · 23/02/2017 11:45

You should drag him to the cinema, I think. Carry him outside if you must and am sure he'll snap out of it.

diddl · 23/02/2017 11:45

I think that I would have made him go, although with the drive & a film that I didn't want to see, I can understand why you didn't.

I think making him pay is a good idea.

It's not good thinking that things can be paid for & then just dropped at will.

But really-you are the adult.

If you want to get out of the house-then it happens!

ExitStage · 23/02/2017 11:46

We used to call our son the Olympic flame as he never went out.

He's 15 now and the bugger is never in!

Carollocking · 23/02/2017 11:47

Oh pretty cheap cinema compared to here

Original poster

bridgetjonesmassivepants · 23/02/2017 11:49

Too late to go to the film now - love the Olympic Flame name! I can feel a new nickname coming on...

Finished the hovering - am going to carry on ignoring the child upstairs in the bath.

OP posts:

thunderbuddy · 23/02/2017 11:51

We never went anywhere like the cinema or theme parks or such as kids either and I found myself over compensating with my own two kids on trying to pack action packed weeks each half term.

Truth is sometimes they just wanted to stay home. One of mine in particular loves going out but hates the hassle to get there.

I would have probably made him go if tickets had been bought though.

Wolfiefan · 23/02/2017 11:53

How long is he spending on tech each day? Limit that for a start and he will soon want to leave the house!

Original poster

bridgetjonesmassivepants · 23/02/2017 11:57

Not much tech - he gets bored of it and likes to play Lego, board games, draw stuff. Unlike Daughter who is attached to her tablet.

OP posts:

Carollocking · 23/02/2017 11:57

Because of having the horses and farm the girls are outside loads,non of mine are over bothered about computers etc they have phones for safety but dont tend to spend that much time on them bar texting a bit for fun.
They have lots of other things they like to do as all like to cook and make craft things and luckily help about the house and farm too.
They love taking the dogs and cat for long walks when not out on there horses.
I never really encouraged computers and tech things though. What's nice to see is some of there friends they have that seem to live for tech stuff when there at home so love to come here and spend time with them and loose all inrerest in tech when have lots of other fun things instead.and never want to go home with tears very often.
We don't go the cinema that much as it's crazy money here and I hate the fact I can't pause the film for pee break etc lol

Carollocking · 23/02/2017 11:58

Mine love lego too

Mamia15 · 23/02/2017 11:58

I would turn off the wifi...

Carollocking · 23/02/2017 11:58

Especially since the lego friends came out

Carollocking · 23/02/2017 12:03

Also admit I love the lego too hehe

Pinbasket · 23/02/2017 12:05

I think this is more to do with the unlimited use of the wifi. It's fun for us all, and even as an adult I'd be happy to use it all day long (if only!)
Maybe you should consider limiting it's use to certain times of the day, or so many hours use a day, especially in the school holidays. I used to find that my daughter would find more creative things to do when I imposed screen free times (including the tv)

OliviaStabler · 23/02/2017 12:09

Did he ask to go to see the film or did you initiate the buying of the tickets?

Viviennemary · 23/02/2017 12:10

If I had paid for the tickets I'd have made him go. And said sorry it's too late to change your mind. Even as adults we don't always feel like doing things but we just have to get on with it.

Carollocking · 23/02/2017 12:14

I think to stop pocket money till your repaid is a good idea,plus maybe in future if you have both decided on something don't back down he goes no matter what.
Have you rung cinema they may give u new tickets if say you broke down or something ?

Flip

1 2 3 4

Swipe left for the next trending thread