To stay off work today

[MrsTarzan1]

I've been feeling anxious/stressed since Christmas. Seen dr a few times and am being treated for this and am on medication.

I've not told work, or had any time off.

Dr told me this week that it sounds like I need time off,but wouldn't give me a dr note until I'd self certified for a week.

I'm worried about having a week off, wouldnt want all the questions when go back - it's a small place & we are all friendly so hard to keep it brief.

Anyway, I think I may stay off today. A colleague is in who does a similar role to me so no work would be missed; and I think a day at home before the kids break up for HT would do me good.

But I feel a bit naughty because I'm not ill as in cough/cold/sickness bug.

AIBU to stay off today?

Yno do as your dr says

There is nothing naughty about looking after your mental and emotional health. The more people start realising this the better! you're not well - take the day off.

Agree the sooner MH issues get treated like broken bones the better!

Take your time or you risk losing it at work like DH did then he never went back. Had he been honest perhaps things would have worked out differently

Thank you. I feel better hearing you say that :)

If your Dr has advised you to stay off, that is NOT "being" naughty. Mental health problems are just a real as physical ones. It is no easier working in a big company if you have something private, and want to keep it that way, do you have a special friend there, you may find they can help and support you.

I understand why you feel like this. It somehow doesn't feel real, as if you know you need to, but no one else (esp at work) would see it like this. I have been on both sides, as an employee taking time off work (due to work related stress, due to overwork and "difficult" manager) and as a member of staff supporting colleagues who have been off for their own MH. If you're in that place you have to protect yourself and if work are unaware then it can easily spiral and get worse.

If you're comfortable and feel able i would suggest talking to work. Do you have an occ health or employee assistance programme? They can be very good.

Take some time for you. Be kind to yourself and don't feel guilty.

Do you have an approachable boss? I'd be honest and get some time off in confidence.

Absolutely take the day off. I have a friend who has worked at the same place for over a decade. She has days off here and there when it's all getting too much for her and as far as I can see, her management are fully in support of this. She continues to do her job and get promotions.

The alternative is to do what I did, which was burn out, break down, get signed off with stress, and then resign.

All the best

Hope you feel better soon. Follow your doctor's advice, especially given @zippedy's experience. Be clear in the reason why - don't say you have a cold if you don't. As pp say, MH issues need to be treated like more "tangible" issues and the sooner the better! Take care of yourself