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AIBU?

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Original poster

To use dd's hand me downs on ds (for one week!)

84 replies

NapQueen · 15/02/2017 12:31

Going away next week and snow is likely (not guaranteed). We have an old set of sallopettes and ski jacket dd used when she was 2. They are purple. Rather than buy ds (now 2) a fresh set for the chance they will get used, im planning on using these.

Dd has new as she is now in age 7 clothes, and as we have since had a ds weve bought her grey sallopettes to re use and a white coat.

Im getting the odd Hmm face off my dad some of our holiday companions. Apparently they are for girls and therefore it would be cruel to dress ds in them. Maximum 2 times. Ive attached a photo.

To use dd's hand me downs on ds (for one week!)
OP posts:
TheProblemOfSusan · 15/02/2017 12:44

Oh ffs. Even if you had millions of money and your dad was paying any way it would STILL be a total waste of money time and resources to buy more. Those are fine. Emperors wear purple, just change his name to Hapsburg for a week if your dad's masculinity is too fragile to handle fucking purple snow gear.

yikesanotherbooboo · 15/02/2017 12:47

Really? No one that I can think of would think that it wasn't entirely normal and reasonable to pass ski wear on. For that matter a lot of clothes , surely you won't be buying everything new for your son; shoes/ boots/ jumpers/ hoodies/ pyjamas / tshirts etc just because they were originally worn by a girl or designed for female children? That would be mad!

MrsJayy · 15/02/2017 12:48

In my family there is 5 girls between 3 cousins my dd being the oldest there is a tonne of photos when they were kids wearing the same jackets jumpers blah de blah not 1 have said why didnt you buy me a new jacket. Dd2 got clothes from twins it was fab hardly needed to buy athing

TheresABluebirdOnMyShoulder · 15/02/2017 12:52

I think the way to handle it is to treat the comments with exactly the amount of consideration that they deserve. I.e. none.

Just be really dismissive and change the subject every time. "Oh don't be silly, dad. They're bloody purple trousers. Where are we meeting for lunch again?" "Not this again, dad. How daft. What time are we heading out?"

SloanyAnne · 15/02/2017 12:57

I bet there wouldn't be a fuss if the situation were reversed and you were putting a DD in blue stuff.
Has your dad always been that hard of thinking? Smile
Trot out the joke that you've had a call from the 1950s asking could he please send his attitudes back as they're overdue.

kimann · 15/02/2017 13:03

you should see what top my son is wearing today, although white, it has flowers and a small pink bow. Yes - he has an older sister Smile Purple is a neutral colour anyway OP.

RedSauce · 15/02/2017 13:05

If the other people care so much, tell them to buy him a new set.

Or, just tell them how ridiculous they're being. Jesus.

Original poster
NapQueen · 15/02/2017 13:06

Ds loves a bit of faff and likes tobhave hair slides in, and tiaras and all sorts. Just like dd sometimes likes to chuck on dh's hiking boots and toolbelt and stomp round the place.

Kids is kids innit.

OP posts:
Broccolirevolution · 15/02/2017 13:08

My kids all wear the same hand me down ski clothes. They are mostly red so neutral BUT I wouldn't care regarding colour. We live near a ski resort and most of the families who go every weekend are like us. There are the occasional families in.stylish split new clothes but what a waste!

Snifftest · 15/02/2017 13:09

They are the definition of gender neutral snow clothing.

I'd buy them for my son.

My favourite item of his is a purple hoody.

Gileswithachainsaw · 15/02/2017 13:09

I would not waste money on something I already had based purely on colour.

What a waste of money and perfectly fine clothing.

FurryLittleTwerp · 15/02/2017 13:14

Oh no OP, what if someone takes a picture of him wearing purple & posts it on Soshul Meeja?? Better get some counselling sessions booked in for him in case he sees them when he's older.

Just remember you can alter digital photos afterwards - might save embarrassment later...

FFS Grin

AgeingArtemis · 15/02/2017 13:14

As a VERY tomboy child who would not have been seen dead in anything resembling "girls" clothes I would have worn them. They may be purple, but there's no "girl power" slogan or glitter or butterflies (not that there's anything wrong with glitter or butterflies Grin)

Besides, he is TWO! He's not going to mind, so why should anyone else?

kingpin20 · 15/02/2017 13:15

Reuse them. purple is a fairly neutral colour anyway I'd say. if you're worried buy one of those iron on patch things from ebay that is very clearly a 'boyish' picture and iron it on the back. Sorted.

I am pretty sure he won't be scared for life by wearing purple :)

SmileEachDay · 15/02/2017 13:16

I mean you could tell your dad that you've decided your DS is gender fluid....

Champers4Pampers · 15/02/2017 13:17

Purple was good enough for Prince & he was an absolute legend in my book.

Reuse them.

anonbecauseiwanna · 15/02/2017 13:19

His penis might fall off though Shock

Northend77 · 15/02/2017 13:20

My 2 year old girls wear blue all in one ski suits that I bought second hand from friends with boys - I can't see how it really matters!! When I look back on photos of me skiing when I was little I have never once asked if the clothes I was wearing were new or second hand - I really can't see that being something he'll even consider asking!

user1477282676 · 15/02/2017 13:22

YANBU. My friend merrily took my very pink and floral lined moses basket for her DS and she also took a number of "girls" baby gros.

She said "I'm not having any more DC>..I've only got boys...I'm having a flowery basket!" she ignored her DH's slight concern when he saw his son resplendent in the basket!

SasBel · 15/02/2017 13:23

Both DS wore/wear DD's purple sallopettes!

Mary21 · 15/02/2017 13:23

All ds,s ski gear came down through cousins girls, onto next part of family cousins boys then my ds,s then onto charity shops . Still would have only been worn for 6 weeks total before hitting charity shops

FacelikeaBagofHammers · 15/02/2017 13:24

My 'poor' son went to bed every night of his first year wearing his sister's pink flowery babygros, I thought he looked gorgeous Smile

rainingkitsandpups · 15/02/2017 13:25

I think they look pretty unisex. My son's favourite colour is purple so we have to buy everything in that colour. Drinks bottles, coats, wellies etc. He is 4 and nobody has ever commented. He's just obsessed with purple.

He's also quite stereotypically male in his behaviour (i hate that phrase but you know what i mean). I've never thought twice about it to be honest.

crocodarl · 15/02/2017 13:27

Dear god. You do know that the whole pink/blue (or star wars themed vs frozen themed or whatever) is just a horrible marketing ploy to make sure people with differently gendered kids have to buy twice as much stuff?

This particular issue drives me bonkers. Because it's not that anyone sane (or very small children) actually give a toss either way... but most, even if they don't like to admit it, are at least a bit concerned about what judgements Other People will make. And no-one wants their kid to be given a hard time.

And before you know it, the kids have subliminally picked up on all this and are refusing stuff on the same basis...

Ok, I'm blethering now. But my point is, just do it. I'm about to give my eldest boy an exceedingly cool (but shocking pink) hand-me-down bike for his 5th birthday following the same logic. Fingers crossed...

Green, orange, anyone?

MatildaTheCat · 15/02/2017 13:29

He will be damaged for life. If you let your father inflict his stupid views on him. Wear purple and defy an ignorant person, makes sense, no?

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